# Geology puns - help me out **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 21, 2011, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523 "2011-03-21T22:01:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2011, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/21 "2011-03-22T16:54:45Z")
Ah well. Chalk this thread up to experience. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2011, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/22 "2011-03-22T16:57:54Z")
> [@lieu](#): > > When’s the best time to buy bullets? On ammonite!\* Praseodymium and pass the ammonites. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2011, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/23 "2011-03-22T18:50:47Z")
Geology is a profession often taken for granite. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2011, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/24 "2011-03-22T18:57:02Z")
Too late for ETA… These fossils are ten million and fourteen years old. (Wait for question about how you know the exact age.) When I started here I was told they were ten million years old and that was fourteen years ago. (Adjust numbers as needed of course.) ---
**Author:** ![Bootis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e8c25b/32.png) [@Bootis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bootis)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2011, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/25 "2011-03-22T21:31:37Z")
What did the geologist golfer say after he hit the iron? Ore! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2011, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/26 "2011-03-22T21:44:08Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > [Cummingtonite](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cummingtonite). God willing. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2011, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/27 "2011-03-22T22:29:26Z")
You guys rock! This is why I love the Straight Dope. When you pass around samples, be sure to ask the class to return them when they are done. I used to know a geologist who did presentations like this until the time when he handed around metamorphic samples and lost his marble. ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2011, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/28 "2011-03-23T07:25:22Z")
OK I simply HAD to buy [this shirt](http://www.zazzle.com/are_you_cummingtonite_tshirt-235135082452514555). ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2011, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/29 "2011-03-23T14:08:49Z")
Another t-shirt/bumper sticker: Geologists never have to stalk their quarry. ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Dave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/46a35a/32.png) [@Great\_Dave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Dave)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2011, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/30 "2011-03-23T15:11:05Z")
Don’t step in the schist! ---
**Author:** ![fumster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9c0ed/32.png) [@fumster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fumster)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2011, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/31 "2011-03-23T15:30:25Z")
Earthquakes swarm through no fault of their own. I keep all my core samples in separate buildings to keep them from being contaminated. I have a shed made out of wood for the shale. I needed something sturdier to hold the basalt so it’s built like a brick schist house. Like birds, dinosaurs would swallow small rocks to help their stomachs grind up food. They had to be careful what kind of rock to use so they didn’t eat schist and die. We spent all day mapping fault lines, but it ended up being anticline-actic. ---
**Author:** ![Twoflower](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/twoflower/32/22_2.png) [@Twoflower](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Twoflower)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2011, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/32 "2011-03-23T15:47:34Z")
Reunite Gondwanaland!!! ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2011, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/33 "2011-03-24T07:06:16Z")
sing: Near a glacier you stand, You see rocks mixed with sand, That’s a moraine! ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2011, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/34 "2011-03-24T13:20:11Z")
> [@chacoguy](#): > > Don’t take schist for granite. I remember a high school teacher in the 1990’s saying something to the effect that “You can take this rock for granite. You can’t take this rock for granite, because it’s limestone.” ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2011, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/35 "2011-03-24T13:22:32Z")
What do you call a can of soda/pop found in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2011, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/36 "2011-03-24T13:54:38Z")
> [@Duckster](#): > > “Pyrites of the Caribbean” I **must** use this line the next time my pirate character gets stoned. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523/37 "2011-03-24T18:27:19Z")
Geologists do it with petrified wood. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geology-puns-help-me-out/575523.md?page=1)