# German Penises 'Too Small for EU Condoms'? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [August 7, 2003, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487 "2003-08-07T01:38:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ShoNuff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@ShoNuff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShoNuff)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/1 "2003-08-07T01:38:17Z")
I’ve never posted in GQ before, so mods forgive me if you must move this thread to somewhere more appropriate. [From Ananova.](http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_358876.html) > [@](#): > > Germany has demanded a rethink on EU guidelines on condom size after finding its average penis did not measure up. > > … > > Urologist Gunther Hagler, head of the team compiling the research, said: "By checking hundreds of patients we found German penises were too small for standard EU condoms. > > “On average they were 14.48 cms long and 3.95 cms wide. That makes them much smaller than the EU standard condom size of 17 cms in length and 5.6 cms in width.” > > He denied the German man was any smaller than the rest of Europe, adding: "We think the EU has got its sums wrong, and if other countries were to check out their men’s assets they would find the EU has made a mistake in its calculations. I’m admittedly no condom expert, but in my experience, one size tends to fit all. How could this discrepancy be possible? How can average penis size vary so greatly over national boundaries? Is it a bizarre physical manifestation of Freudian guilt? People smarter than I, I beg of you: HELP! ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/2 "2003-08-07T02:06:34Z")
Your answer is in your own post: "He denied the German man was any smaller than the rest of Europe, adding: ‘We think the EU has got its sums wrong, and if other countries were to check out their men’s assets they would find the EU has made a mistake in its calculations.’ " ---
**Author:** ![Agback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/977dab/32.png) [@Agback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agback)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/3 "2003-08-07T03:17:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ShoNuff \* > **I’m admittedly no condom expert, but in my experience, one size tends to fit all.** Not quite. I have never been tempted to try a ‘mega’ condom (59mm nominal diameter), but I find that the ‘extra-sensitive’ (52 mm) ones are uncomfortably tight. Regards, Agback ---
**Author:** ![SandyHook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dec6dc/32.png) [@SandyHook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SandyHook)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/4 "2003-08-07T04:08:10Z")
I can’t wait to hear about some German mini-dude visiting, oh, let us say Spain, who’s standing in the condom aisle waving a box at some cashier and asking, “Do you have these in petite?” ---
**Author:** ![NothingMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b77776/32.png) [@NothingMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NothingMan)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/5 "2003-08-07T04:13:11Z")
From what I know _Ananova_ is a respected source. This still sounds like an old joke to me. ---
**Author:** ![Blackeyes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f6c823/32.png) [@Blackeyes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackeyes)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/6 "2003-08-07T04:32:31Z")
There was a joke in the Cold War with Reagan and Gorbachev that went kind of like that. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/7 "2003-08-07T04:57:56Z")
[In related news …](http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_805215.html?menu=news.quirkies) ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/8 "2003-08-07T06:07:06Z")
> [@](#): > > From what I know _Ananova_ is a respected source. I’m not sure I agree… ---
**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 8:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/9 "2003-08-07T08:28:20Z")
I guess this explains why they keep starting world wars… 😃 But more seriously, I’m guessing there was probably some inaccuracy in measurement. It seems improbable (though possible) that one European ethnic group would be that genetically different from other ones, including some that are closely related. Then again, the story could be a joke or a hoax. I like the last line: “After all, they have also ruled EU standard condoms should be able to hold 18 litres of fluid without breaking, which also seems a bit excessive.” ---
**Author:** ![Tusculan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Tusculan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tusculan)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 9:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/10 "2003-08-07T09:59:13Z")
I very much doubt the veracity of the story. [EUR-Lex](http://www.europa.eu.int/eur-lex/en/index.html), the database of official documents of the EU gives only a few listings of the word ‘condom’ , none of which refer to anything like this story. (However, I did learn that there exists a French canton with that name). Nonetheless, in itself it would not be strange if there would be a EU-regulation on condoms; they are consumer articles after all. Googling for German pages containing the name “Gunther Hagler” only resulted in lots of pages repeating this story. Googling restricted to sites in Germany got me exactly zero results. One would expect that there would be some news of this in Germany. Given these results I’m assuming the story is false, unless someone can back it up with references to official sources. ---
**Author:** ![raygirvan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ac91a4/32.png) [@raygirvan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raygirvan)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 10:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/11 "2003-08-07T10:37:08Z")
_should be able to hold 18 litres of fluid without breaking_ … although that could be taken as a simple measure of breaking strength rather than implying that they’d in practice need to contain 18 litres. However, like **Tusculan** , I’m very suspicious: among those anti-Europe in the UK, there’s a huge industry in “[Euromyth](http://edition.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2000/eurounion/story/laws/)” stories falsely claiming bizarre EU rules, and this looks related to the one about allegedly [standardising condom sizes](http://www.cec.org.uk/press/myths/myth21.htm). ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/12 "2003-08-07T11:49:50Z")
Actually condoms are contemplated in international safety standard ISO 4074 and it is the Chinese, not the Germans, who have small dicks. [http://sailor.teemingmillions.com/chicom.htm](http://sailor.teemingmillions.com/chicom.htm) ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/13 "2003-08-08T00:41:35Z")
Just to let you know, I have seen this thread, and even as we speak, I am weeping. This is not what I wanted to hear about German penises. At all. ---
**Author:** ![MikeG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikeg/32/4329_2.png) [@MikeG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeG)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/14 "2003-08-08T00:54:07Z")
Obviously the Irish data sampling threw off the entire study 🙂 Poor Germans 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/15 "2003-08-08T00:58:29Z")
I’ve got a friend who spent time in Kenya, who says that at least one of the many reasons why Kenyans (and Africans in general) are resistant to using condoms is that they don’t come large enough. I’ll point her to this thread; maybe she’ll grace us with some knowledge. ---
**Author:** ![KenGr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecc23a/32.png) [@KenGr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KenGr)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/16 "2003-08-08T02:01:15Z")
I recently ran across an article in a Korean newspaper (Dong-a Ilbo - the name seems relevant to this thread) noting that the average human penis was 15cm in length but the average Korean’s was 12.5 cm. This is remarkable given the usual reluctance to admit any “shortcoming”. Here’s the link: [Dong-a Ilbo](http://english.donga.com/srv/service.php3?bicode=100000&biid=2003073115268) (I won’t speculate on the accuracy of any of this.) ---
**Author:** ![Carnac\_the\_Magnificent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Carnac\_the\_Magnificent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carnac_the_Magnificent)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/17 "2003-08-08T02:16:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > \*\*Just to let you know, I have seen this thread, and even as we speak, I am weeping. This is not what I wanted to hear about German penises. > > At all. \*\* Not to worry. The average male on SDMB is three TIMES the reported German length and four times the girth. Our median IQ is 246, our biceps 21 inches in circumference, and few of us are less than multibillionaires. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/18 "2003-08-08T02:41:02Z")
whew ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/19 "2003-08-08T05:58:07Z")
So, an online news service that doesn’t tell you any information about the publisher or reporters? Not reliable. WRT the news report: The claim is that the EU condom standard of six and three quarters of an inch is too big for the average German’s penis of five and three quarters of an inch. Condoms are usually an inch and half longer than average size to allow for longer than average sized men. For men of average or shorter length, all that extra condom remains rolled up at the base of the penis. So, I find that the EU are mandating condoms to be only six and three quarters of an inch long to be rather implausible. Peace. ---
**Author:** ![Deptford](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Deptford](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deptford)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2003, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487/20 "2003-08-08T12:23:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Country Squire \* > \*\*Not to worry. The average male on SDMB is three TIMES the reported German length and four times the girth. Our median IQ is 246, our biceps 21 inches in circumference, and few of us are less than multibillionaires. \*\* All of the above is true for me except i’m a little short on my multibillion dollars. Could you let me have a few hundred million so i don’t bring the average down? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/german-penises-too-small-for-eu-condoms/193487.md?page=2)