# Get ready to waste a lot of time on this website

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [November 26, 2009, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004 "2009-11-26T04:25:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 14\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/1 "2009-11-26T04:25:18Z")

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[The SCP Foundation.](http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/main) It’s a wiki that takes the form of a large inventory of sorts of a secretive research foundation. Each entry is another “item” in the inventory. It’s not just objects, there are several living things, abstract things, large contraptions, etc…

I’ve already wasted a lot of time reading this site over. It’s sucks you in, because most entries have links to other entries, so you read those, which have links to others, etc…

A couple of my favorites so far:

[SCP-294.](http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-294)

> [@](#):
>
> Item SCP-294 appears to be a standard coffee vending machine, the only noticeable difference being an entry touchpad with buttons corresponding to an English QWERTY keyboard. Upon depositing fifty cents US currency into the coin slot, the user is prompted to enter the name of any liquid using the touchpad. Upon doing so, a standard 12-ounce paper drinking cup is placed and the liquid indicated is poured.

> [@](#):
>
> Document SCP-294a (regarding incident 294-01): On August 21, 2005, Agent Joseph ██████ attempted to utilize Item SCP-294 to obtain coffee during his allotted break time at 9:30 AM. At the request of Agent █████ █████████ “to see what it would do”, ██████ requested “a cup of Joe” from the item. Moments after confirming the selection, Agent Joseph ██████ began to sweat profusely and complained of dizziness before collapsing. After being moved to the infirmary, the medical team recovered the contents of the cup dispensed by Item SCP-294; a foul-smelling combination of blood, bits of flesh, and other various bodily fluids. Most disturbingly, testing revealed the DNA sequence of the biological material dispensed by Item SCP-294 matched that of Agent ██████.

> [@](#):
>
> Addendum [SCP-294ad]: Researcher produced request consisting solely of the phrase, “Surprise me.” Device produced a opaque cup containing normal water, later determined to have been superheated to about 200 degrees Celsius. Upon receiving vibration from transport, the contents of the cup turned into steam, violently spraying boiling water in a 2 meter range. Researcher reported a quantifiable level of surprise at the occurrence.

Ha!

There’s also downright _creep-as-fuck_ ones.  
[SCP-075](http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-075)

> [@](#):
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> Description: SCP-075 resembles a large snail …with a muscular foot resembling a six-fingered, clawed hand…When not desiccated, SCP-075…adopts the behavior of a predator, jumping at and drenching its prey in a highly caustic base solution secreted from pores on its foot. These secretions are more corrosive than any substance known to terrestrial science.

[SCP-173](http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-173)

> [@](#):
>
> Description:…It is constructed from concrete and rebar with traces of Krylon brand spray paint. SCP-173 is animate and extremely hostile. The object cannot move while within a direct line of sight. Line of sight must not be broken at any time with SCP-173. Personnel assigned to enter container are instructed to alert one another before blinking. Object is reported to attack by snapping the neck at the base of the skull, or by strangulation. In the event of an attack, personnel are to observe Class 4 hazardous object containment procedures.

Good thing I don’t have to go to work tomorrow cause I’ll be exploring this site for _hours._

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/2 "2009-11-26T04:51:49Z")

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I think I got a cute overdose from today’s featured article. Now to read it.

NSFW link: http: [//scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-2558-j](https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-2558-j)

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**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/3 "2009-11-26T05:26:27Z")

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Yeah, I’ve spent lots of time there. If you like that you might also like The Holders.

[http://theholders.org/?Special:Main](http://theholders.org/?Special:Main)

Click on the series list, there are some 500+ short stories about the Holders.

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**Author:** ![badlyburnttoast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ad7895/32.png) [@badlyburnttoast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badlyburnttoast)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/4 "2009-11-26T05:29:37Z")

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I remember way back in the dark ages of the internet they had a very similar website, only it was not a wiki and it had a warehouse theme. You clicked to open a box, and it spit out a random description of an item.

Can’t find it on google, don’t know if it’s still around.

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**Author:** ![wunderkammer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ed8c4c/32.png) [@wunderkammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wunderkammer)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/5 "2009-11-26T07:22:15Z")

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[Warehouse 23 basement?](http://www.warehouse23.com/basement/)

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**Author:** ![brujaja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@brujaja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brujaja)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 8:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/6 "2009-11-26T08:43:39Z")

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> [@wunderkammer](#):
>
> [Warehouse 23 basement?](http://www.warehouse23.com/basement/)

Ooooh, thank you!

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**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/7 "2009-11-26T13:06:17Z")

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> [@wunderkammer](#):
>
> [Warehouse 23 basement?](http://www.warehouse23.com/basement/)

I’d forgotten about that one. I submitted a few items to it while cleaning out my apartment.

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**Author:** ![badlyburnttoast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ad7895/32.png) [@badlyburnttoast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badlyburnttoast)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/8 "2009-11-26T18:15:26Z")

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> [@wunderkammer](#):
>
> [Warehouse 23 basement?](http://www.warehouse23.com/basement/)

Yes, that’s it, thanks!

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**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2009, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/9 "2009-11-27T00:05:26Z")

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My inner geek/computer historian loves [SCP-079](http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-079), particularly because it involves an obscure computer I’ve actually played with. 🙂

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**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2009, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/10 "2009-11-27T01:13:23Z")

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Cripes. I just spent two hours looking through the Foundation’s pages. I may have to join…

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**Author:** ![Brainiac4](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brainiac4/32/3534_2.png) [@Brainiac4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brainiac4)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2009, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/11 "2009-11-27T01:44:53Z")

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Yeah, that’s a timesuck and a half. Great ideas for a Delta Green game there.

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**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2009, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/12 "2009-11-27T16:40:32Z")

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Damn, [SCP-093](http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-093) is just crazy. It starts off not seeming interesting, but then once you read the five ‘tests’ and other things at the bottom it gets intense. Creeped me right the fuck out.

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**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2009, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/13 "2009-11-27T19:08:32Z")

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Is it just me, or does anyone else think that this might be the basis of a kick-ass RPG?

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**Author:** ![Brainiac4](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brainiac4/32/3534_2.png) [@Brainiac4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brainiac4)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2009, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ready-to-waste-a-lot-of-time-on-this-website/519004/14 "2009-11-27T21:11:41Z")

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I think so. You could integrate the SCP into a Delta Green game, or use a framework like Fringeworthy or Bureau 13, or just go with D20 Modern and wing the rest of it.

I may need to do that…
