# Get the hell outta my car, ya hooker! Or, worst. night. ever.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [November 26, 2002, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956 "2002-11-26T20:37:18Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Kyomara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyomara)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/21 "2002-11-27T01:49:50Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by ratty \*
> \*\*You knew he was going to buy drugs, and you gave him the money anyway? This is not only incredibly irresponsible, it also makes it completely your fault when they later started smoking crack in your car. :rolleyes: \*\*
To be fair, in my limited experience at gay clubs cocaine is consumed on the spot, and I doubt that $10 would get anyone enough that they would have some to carry around after they had had some.
FWIW
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### Author:  [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/22 "2002-11-27T02:52:42Z")
\*\* B.Pants\*\*, if I understand you correctly, you knowingly went into a bad part of a town that was strange to you, with a person you knew to be a drug user, looking for a somewhat unconventional pick-up date. Then you were _surprised and offended_ that some weird shit went down?
If you just turned 19, you must be a very inexperienced 19. I hope you learned something: Namely, that when you set off on an adventure such as that, some weird stuff is very likely to happen. It’s not unusual in such circumstances, it’s the norm.
I’m not really being critical here. I have been to some strange places and seen some strange things myself, but that’s what I expected to happen when I left the house.
For your own safety, please be better prepared to deal with things before you leave home on a Saturday night. 😉
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### Author:  [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/23 "2002-11-27T03:11:53Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by B.Pants \*
> \*\*I’m only 19 now. It’s been a month or so since this incident happened. See? Not so weird. \*\*
Well goodness, you’ve just got a pat answer for everything. Kudos to you.
Nope, nothing weird here. Moving along…
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### Author:  [@Blalron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blalron)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/24 "2002-11-27T03:23:08Z")
I laughed my ass off reading B.Pants story. Especially the image I got about the pimp yelling “YOU BEST NOT DISRESPECT MY BITCH!” as she accelerated away at full speed.
Stay AWAY from low life drug addicts. My father lost $10,000 in cash, a laptop, two digital cameras, a 15 speed mountain bike, and a 500 pound arch welder that was bolted to the side of his truck before he realized this. They aren’t your friends.
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### Author:  [@DKW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DKW)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/25 "2002-11-27T03:49:45Z")
I just got a couple things to add.
First, you’ve _got_ to find a new sport. My suggestion: soccer. That way, when you see something that rubs you completely wrong, you can just think “red card” and end the foolishness right then and there. If you think that might be a little harsh, you can call “yellow card” instead, meaning that you’ll let it slide once, but if anything like it happens again, you’re outta there. This just makes more sense to me. I’ve never understood the logic of allowing yourself to get kicked in the teeth three times before you even react.
Second…you _are_ aware the the kind of person who’d become a prostitute would have to be pretty shameless to begin with, right? So it shouldn’t be all that shocking that one of them just, er, initiated a transaction with the first customer she saw (which, yes, is how a lot of them actually do work)? And it also happens to be illegal, so there isn’t exactly a list of guidelines for proper professional conduct?
Seems to me that you just got taken for a ride. The best thing to do is not let it eat you up, learn from the experience, and be thankful that any number of far worse things didn’t happen. Trust me, $10 is a bargain for the wisdom you gained.
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### Author:  [@kevja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kevja)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/26 "2002-11-27T03:59:56Z")
A few years from now, you are going to love to tell this story. And it won’t be Pit rant style either. It will be that kind of thing where someone tells a wacky story about some weird experiencethey had. And then you’ll say, oh yeah, let me tell you about the time we were on our way to a glbt club, and these guys were smoking crack in the backseat of my car, and then some hooker and her pimp got involved.
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### Author:  [@B.Pants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Pants)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/27 "2002-11-27T07:24:33Z")
> [@](#):
>
> _Originally posted by John Carter of Mars \*
> \*\*\*\* B.Pants_\*, if I understand you correctly, you knowingly went into a bad part of a town that was strange to you, with a person you knew to be a drug user, looking for a somewhat unconventional pick-up date. Then you were _surprised and offended_ that some weird shit went down?
>
> \*\*
For the record, I knew he was supposedly a _former_ crack addict, but had court ordered drug tests and had not used in over a year. I wasn’t looking for a pick-up date, I just wanted to meet someone and have clean fun. I wasn’t offended that weird shit went down; I like weird shit sometimes. Just not this goddamn weird. I was mostly struck by the crack whore in the car than anything else. It was horrifying at the time, but it makes it worth having the rest of the horrible night. Everybody needs a crack whore story! Might as well get it young!
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### Author:  [@B.Pants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Pants)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/28 "2002-11-27T07:26:09Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by John Carter of Mars \*
> \*\*
> For your own safety, please be better prepared to deal with things before you leave home on a Saturday night. 😉 \*\*
It was a Thursday! 😉
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### Author:  [@B.Pants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Pants)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/29 "2002-11-27T07:27:21Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by AntaresJB \*
> \*\*I just find it amusing that this: :eek: is the face you use for those other “favors”, considering that :eek: is probably exactly the mouth shape, at least, that he used to perform the favors.
>
> Not that I’d know. 😉 \*\*
Heh heh, that’s actually why I put it. The :o puts me in that mind as well.
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### Author:  [@Ms2001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms2001)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/30 "2002-11-27T12:08:25Z")
Once when I was driving with some friends, a hooker tried to come into our car at a stop sign. She opened the passenger door of the truck holding a beer and slurred, “You lookin’ for a good time?”
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### Author:  [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/31 "2002-11-27T12:20:10Z")
I once had a hooker get in my car in Philadelphia while we were lost in San Francisco. There were four of us, but the only person in the car with me was my friend, George. George pulled out his thing and started masturbating, so I yelled for him to stop. But the man in the back seat joined him, and the two of them made a big mess in my car. I told them to clean it up, but they ignored me and said they wanted me to show them mine. I refused, but the girl in the passenger seat grabbed my zipper, and all of a sudden I was beseiged by a whole motorcycle gang that was pulling my pants off. I turned on my windshield wipers, but that didn’t help. When the cop pulled us over, two dwarfs were sucking my toes and Carl was screaming “Rape!”. Lucky for me, the cop was one of those life-size cardboard things and couldn’t speak Hungarian.
I’m just glad all this happened on a Tuesday.
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### Author:  [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/32 "2002-11-27T13:06:30Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by B.Pants \*
> For months, a “friend”, R, from work had been bugging me to go out and hit the GLBT clubs with him. Finally, I agreed to go out for a bit of fun. At the first club we went to, I wasn’t allowed in because it’s 21 and up on weeknights.
OK… bad sign, he takes you somewhere you can’t go…
> [@](#):
>
> That was fine with me until R decided that he was going to go in without me and that I could just wait in my car while he picked someone up. Now, it would seem like any normal person would say “Hell no!” but I’m nice
No, hon - you’re a doormat. Someone does that to you, tell him “Chauffeur services are $100 and hour and the meter’s running” Better yet, drive off RIGHT THEN and leave his sorry ass behind.
> [@](#):
>
> cell phone in hand.
Please remember the cellphone. It will be referred to later.
> [@](#):
>
> He wants to borrow 10 dollars.
>
> Why? To buy some cocaine!!! Strike one.
Wrong. Strike three. One was taking you to a club you couldn’t enter. Two was abandoning you outside.
> [@](#):
>
> but I had intended to let him borrow a bit of money anyway, so I just went ahead and gave the money to him.
Never, ever, NEVER give money to someone for drugs!. NEVER!
> [@](#):
>
> He returns with some fellow he has just met. They both clamber into my back seat (like I’m some sort of hook-up chauffeur for drunks) and tell me where we’re going next.
Well, yes, he’s been treating you as chauffeur all night, didn’t you notice?.
> [@](#):
>
> As I drive, I smell a strange smell. I glance in my rearview mirror, and these fucks are
>
> **smoking CRACK COCAINE in MY car**.
I want you to realize what sort of situation you had got yourself into, young lady.
They’re in the back seat committing a felony. If the lot of you are pulled over, the assumption will be, until proven otherwise, that you were also committing said felony. Try to convince the nice cops you WEREN’T smoking crack when your hair and clothes reek of it. And you’ll get charged with a DUI. Also, as the driver of the vehicle, you will be held responsible for whatever happens in that vehicle - even if you can prove you weren’t getting high, you’ll still be brought up on charges of aiding and abetting. If convicted, you’re little butt could land in jail for _decades_. Also, even if you WEREN’T convicted, you’d almost certainly lose your car.
So, you were risking losing your car, fucking up your driving record, and losing the best years of your life to jail. And you can’t even call the cops for help, because they would arrest YOU, too.
Do NOT let people put you in this position. How do you avoid this? By breaking the chain of events as soon as Mr. Asshole takes you someone you can’t legally enter you say STOP. Right there. Don’t be a “nice girl”. The jails are full of “nice girls” who let themselves be used.
> [@](#):
>
> Since I was on the interstate, I didn’t want to pull over and risk having a cop enter the picture. It was occuring in MY car, after all, and a cop might not understand my lack of involvement.
Of course not. You ARE involved.
> [@](#):
>
> We got to the bookstore, and I told them there would be no more smoking in my car of any sort. They agreed
And you believed them? Never, ever, believe druggies. They lie. All the time.
> [@](#):
>
> Of course, at this point, I should have left them both there, but I didn’t even know where I was well enough to do that.
Yes, you should have left them. Don’t know where you are? You have that cellphone, right?
Here’s what you do, should you ever have the misfortune to experience this again. Without telling the guys, you go out to your car, get inside, and lock all the doors. Start the engine so it’s good and warmed up. _Call the police_. Either get their number from information or, if you must, call 911. Tell the nice person you are lost in a bad part of town and fear for your safety, please either send instructions or the police to assist you. Would 911 get annoyed by this? Not if you tell them that these two guys want to use your car to buy drugs and whores and you need to get away from them and you’re afraid what they might do to you if they find out you’re thinking of getting away.
So… why didn’t you think to use the phone?
> [@](#):
>
> He wants my keys so he can go “talk” to someone in my car. I tell him there are plenty of places to talk.
YES! You DO have a backbone!
You realize, of course, that you may have saved yourself from having your car ripped off, don’t you?
> [@](#):
>
> He shows up an hour later (yet again, I should have just left him, but didn’t have the heart; we were an hour away from home).
Yes, you should have left him. An hour from home? Tough shit - he can get his own damn car.
**B.Pants** , don’t be such a “nice girl”. It will get you hurt badly one day.
> [@](#):
>
> I pull up to a stop sign, and wait to be able to pull out. Suddenly, the passenger side door opens and the unthinkable occurs: **a dirty street whore GETS IN THE BACKSEAT**!
Yes, that is how many of them operate.
> [@](#):
>
> Excuse me? You’re not from around here? That’s an excuse to get in my car? This is just what prostitutes _do_ in your neck of the woods?
Yep, that’s what streetwalkers do in pretty much any neck of the woods.
> [@](#):
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> He gets out of the car, and goes in the club. And what did I do? I got the hell out of there!
FINALLY!!!
> [@](#):
>
> Speaking of things that never happened, I never got any money back from him, either.
And at that, you got off damn cheap.
You’re 19. Obviously, there’s a lot for you to learn. But if nothing else, learn from this experience to put the brakes on EARLY in these situations. Don’t be too “nice” when someone it trying to use you for their own ends.
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### Author:  [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/33 "2002-11-27T14:38:21Z")
I just wanted to say that after reading this thread, I don’t wanna **B. Pants**.
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### Author:  [@B.Pants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Pants)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/34 "2002-11-27T15:00:11Z")
Broomstick,
many of these things you mention that I should have done are things that I have now figured out that I should have done. My foresight needs some glasses, but whew!, that hindsight is sharp!
Please do remember that one night of being stepped on does not make me a doormat forever! I’m usually pretty strong about not getting kicked in the teeth, but it happens to everyone, eh?
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### Author:  [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/35 "2002-11-27T15:06:34Z")
Aw, come on, you guys! Lighten up on her a bit. Yeah, she made some bad decisions that night, but I get the feeling that it was a Massive Learning Experience[sup]TM[/sup]. We’ve all done things in peer-pressure situations that were pretty stupid in hindsight. Besides, her intentions were good (not wanting to leave him in the lurch).
Plus, it was a good story.
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### Author:  [@Janx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Janx)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/36 "2002-11-27T15:26:19Z")
Shouldnt that be \*\* P.J. Pants\*\* ?😉
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### Author:  [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2002, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/37 "2002-11-27T15:37:11Z")
I think you could have been nicer to the prostitute.
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### Author:  [@Badtz\_Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Badtz_Maru)
#### Post date: [November 28, 2002, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/38 "2002-11-28T05:24:26Z")
You think that’s bad? I was out with my best friend and one of her friends, and we had to stop by her parents house so she could pick up something. I’m sitting in my friend’s parents driveway (who I was pretty close to, they joked that they had adopted me) when I noticed that my passenger in the back seat was SHOOTING UP. Now, I’ve been known to enjoy recreational chemicals and am pretty libertarian when it comes to drug use, but IV drugs are something I have never done and never will do, and it bothered me a bit.
I didn’t kick him out of the car, though. I would have had to end up explaining to my friend’s parents why.
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### Author:  [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)
#### Post date: [November 28, 2002, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/39 "2002-11-28T12:21:33Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by B.Pants \*
> [many of these things you mention that I should have done are things that I have now figured out that I should have done. My foresight needs some glasses, but whew!, that hindsight is sharp!
Mostly, I just wanted to be sure you were aware of those items.
Yes, I understand this is how you gain the necessary experience to stay out trouble next time. I did stuff that, in hindsight, is equally naive (because that’s what it was - naivite, not stupidity). I don’t like to see Bad Things happen to people because they wandered into places they shouldn’t be.
I’m glad you survived the experience, and a couple years from now you’ll be telling the story and laughing about it to friends. But try to avoid a sequel, OK? You know how sequels are almost never as good as the original, especially the ending…
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### Author:  [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [November 28, 2002, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-the-hell-outta-my-car-ya-hooker-or-worst-night-ever/138956/40 "2002-11-28T15:16:27Z")
All I have to add to this is:
a. **Broomstick** was right on the money.
b. Drive with all your doors locked. All the time. Make it a habit; get in, turn on car, get seatbelt on, lock door while grabbing for seatbelt.
c. Get a city map and keep it in your car. I use mine all the time.
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