# Get ya new noble titles here! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 16, 2003, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626 "2003-05-16T06:11:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Capcha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Capcha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capcha)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/61 "2003-05-17T03:36:13Z")
You shall henceforth be known as: Duchess of The Alliance of Drunk Driving, Jedi Master Dee Herba Essential Oh wait, that’s not very funny. lmfao…i get drunk but i don’t drive…yet…should i take it as a warning? ---
**Author:** ![Avarie537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/48db29/32.png) [@Avarie537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avarie537)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/62 "2003-05-17T04:03:47Z")
HOLY CRAP!!! Gotta include this one!! **Centurion of Deep Throating, Avarie Jensen, the Sixth** _That outfit looks really good on you._ Sounds like the title of a bad porno movie AND the first line!!! I used to love to go to karaoke! **Queen of Karaoke Bars, Avarie Greely** \*Now you just have to stop turning around whenever somebody yells, “Hey, freak!” \* Ok, **Tiburon, kungfulola, and all you other rug-munchers**!! I have ARRIVED!! **Admiral of Lesbians, Avarie Sawyer** _I deleted this._ It said: That lump is cancer. Not gonna make Dopers sad in such a funny thread. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/63 "2003-05-17T04:23:45Z")
Centurion of Paychecks, Marley [middle name they made up, real last name] This page is brought to you by the letters “AE” and [I think it’s rho] and the number e[sup]1[/sup]. Constable of Calculators, Marley Where is the potato? Minor Deacon Emeritus of The Ancient Order of Small Furry Animals, Marley [realname] Now that’s what I call a sticky situation. Marquis of Sticking Your Head and Arms Out the Window, Marley [ahem] That outfit looks really good on you. Captain of Bubble Wrap, Marley L. [blah] Abandon all hope, all ye who press Enter. ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/64 "2003-05-17T04:50:26Z")
Tried it again tonight… this is what I got: \*\*Empress of The Institute for Promotion of Spastic Colons, Flami C. Hansen \*\* \*In my home country, this is a withering insult. \* \*\*Lesser Sorceress of Canned Air, Señorita Flami Hansen XVI \*\* \*In the unlikely event of a water landing, this title is designed to be used as a flotation device. \* Very fun… I’ve tried it with my friends’ names, too. 😃 F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/65 "2003-05-17T04:54:58Z")
Oh, I just got one which I can’t figure out… **Caesar of Yggdrasil, Goodtimz Mara Pho** \*Do you feel better about yourself now? \* What / Where the heck is Yggdrasil? F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Fairy\_Princess\_Kitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df705f/32.png) [@Fairy\_Princess\_Kitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fairy_Princess_Kitty)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/66 "2003-05-17T05:06:07Z")
Acting Sovereign of Small Furry Animals It seems somehow appropriate. Kitty ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/67 "2003-05-17T06:45:38Z")
I’m holding you personally responsible for this outrage, **Flamsterette\_X.** It said to me: > [@](#): > > You shall henceforth be known as: > > Headmaster of Beating Dead Horses, Satisfying Andy Licious > > You are nothing but a goddamned communist. ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/68 "2003-05-17T06:47:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Flamsterette\_X \* > \*\* > What / Where the heck is Yggdrasil? > F\_X \*\* It’s a Norse thing. You wouldn’t understand. ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/69 "2003-05-17T06:51:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Satisfying Andy Licious \* > **I’m holding you personally responsible for this outrage, Flamsterette\_X…** Hey **SAL** , you can always change it if you don’t like it, you know! > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Satisfying Andy Licious \* > **It’s a Norse thing. You wouldn’t understand.** Really? Try me anyhow. (unless it’s so esoteric that I really wouldn’t understand, but gimme the basics anyhow) F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/70 "2003-05-17T06:56:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Flamsterette\_X \* > **Hey SAL, you can always change it if you don’t like it, you know!** I know. That was the **better** one. > [@](#): > > \*\*Really? Try me anyhow. (unless it’s so esoteric that I really wouldn’t understand, but gimme the basics anyhow) > > F\_X \*\* [Yggdrasil](http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=yggdrasil&r=67) is this great big tree that holds up the sky and has hell in its roots, sort of. ---
**Author:** ![BraheSilver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@BraheSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BraheSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/71 "2003-05-17T07:00:10Z")
Godfather Maximus of Ladies in Waiting, Brahe “Dead Monkey” Silver I won’t make fun of your new name. You know why? Because I’m not that guy. Duke of The Ridiculous Army of Random Acts of Violence, Brahe Silver XV We are all Kosh. Maharaja of Poon Appreciation, Master Brahe Horseradish Silver You are nothing but a goddamned communist. Teenage Mutant Ninja Paladin-In-Training of Haunted Houses, Mr. Brahe “Magic Marker” Silver, The Seldom Lucid Hey, that’s what I call your mom in bed! Tsar of Panties, Father Brahe Silver, Oppressor o’ the Masses A name will not make you more popular. Unless you hang out with real puds. Okay, I’ll stop now. But this thing is fun! ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/72 "2003-05-17T07:27:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Satisfying Andy Licious \* > \*\*[Yggdrasil](http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=yggdrasil&r=67) is this great big tree that holds up the sky and has hell in its roots, sort of. \*\* Hmm. I knew that sounded familiar from _somewhere_… Thanks for the reminder. 🙂 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by BraheSilver \* > **Tsar of Panties…** I told a friend of mine about this site, and he got dubbed the “birdman of panties.” Heh. Now, this puts me in mind of the game that my dear friend Eric and I saw in an Electronics Boutique once… _Panty Raider_. :eek: F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/73 "2003-05-17T14:46:03Z")
Bow down in fear, folks, to the new: Teenage Mutant Ninja Inspector Junior Grade of Cannibalistic Rituals to the Glory of Cheesy Comestibles ---
**Author:** ![Sapphire\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f14d63/32.png) [@Sapphire\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapphire_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/74 "2003-05-17T15:46:27Z")
_Secretary of The Opposite of Stating The Obvious, Sapphire Wolf._ Does this mean that anytime someone states the obvious, I get to record it, and then record who puts the smackdown on them? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![green\_bladder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/73ab20/32.png) [@green\_bladder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/green_bladder)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/75 "2003-05-17T15:58:09Z")
_ **The Guy In Charge of No Pants, Green Bladder** _ How did they know?! \*\*\*Secretary of Wieners and Telepathic Snow Dolphin-like Things, Green Jebediah Bladder \*\*\* ---
**Author:** ![TelcontarStorm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3ab097/32.png) [@TelcontarStorm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TelcontarStorm)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/76 "2003-05-17T16:28:37Z")
Weeeeeeeeeeee This is fun. I’m the Ambassator of Wee Ceramic Kittens!! And Viscount Junior Grade of boxes of Animal Crackers. Not fair my Nephew gets to be High Ceaser of Poon appriation. I bet I appriation got more than he does… _grumble_ ---
**Author:** ![bibliophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@bibliophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophile)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/77 "2003-05-17T18:48:52Z")
I’m **The Godess of Yesterday Morning.** I kinda like it. I’m usually late and I’ve always thought I’d make a pretty laid-back godess! ---
**Author:** ![imthjckaz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/imthjckaz/32/3223_2.png) [@imthjckaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/imthjckaz)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2003, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/78 "2003-05-19T00:15:58Z")
\*\*Moff of Violent Nausea, Imthjckaz Zanatakis XV \*\* Well, they won’t be able to make a derogatory nickname from this one. Oh, wait… or **Mayor of Cannibalistic Rituals to the Glory of Stoopid Title Generators, Scrumptious Imthjckaz Kenobi** There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary and those who don’t. or \*\*Caesar Emeritus of The Klopfenstein Institute of Cloud Shape Analysis and Junior-High School, Imthjckaz Alcatraz \*\* … but you still make minimum wage or \*\*Marquis of Zeppelins, Imthjckaz Cummings \*\* Space aliens can have my penis when they pry it from my cold, lifeless hand. I don’t know which one I like better. ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2003, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/79 "2003-05-19T02:59:30Z")
I ended up being Chairman of the Order of White-Collar Crime, Don (insert real name here). Nice job, I should say. ---
**Author:** ![Necromancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac91a4/32.png) [@Necromancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Necromancer)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2003, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626/80 "2003-05-19T03:09:22Z")
My title is: Woman-at-arms of Things That Go “Bump” in the Night …but I already knew that. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-ya-new-noble-titles-here/175626.md?page=5)