# Get your baby's dirty ass off the restaurant table! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 23, 2010, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435 "2010-05-23T03:58:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/221 "2010-05-24T19:23:14Z")
[QUOTE=C3;12492348The factions are the OP, people who agree with your list, and people who agree with your list and can’t pass up the opportunity to freak out about DtC.[/QUOTE] Well, Dio made an ass out himself several ways from the VERY start. I don’t think I need to list them. And got royally called out on it (by most everybody). And he has been back pedaling furiously since. A few more Dio threads like this and I am going Dio free. ---
**Author:** ![kidchameleon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/222 "2010-05-24T19:26:10Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > If they’re not following procedure, then your beef is with the management of the store, not with parents parenting their children. If? But I thought all restaurants cleaned their tables. Which is it? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/223 "2010-05-24T19:27:32Z")
I haven’t back pedalled from shit. ---
**Author:** ![C3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/c3/32/3108_2.png) [@C3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C3)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/224 "2010-05-24T19:28:29Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Well, > > Dio made an ass out himself several ways from the VERY start. I don’t think I need to list them. And got royally called out on it (by most everybody). And he has been back pedaling furiously since. > > A few more Dio threads like this and I am going Dio free. Please, do that. The people jumping on everything he says are far more annoying than he is. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/225 "2010-05-24T19:28:51Z")
> [@kidchameleon](#): > > If? But I thought all restaurants cleaned their tables. Which is it? They all clean their tables. They just might not all do it very promptly. If you see shit on a table, don’t use that table. You should also complain to the management because that would be just disgusting. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/226 "2010-05-24T19:32:09Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > They all clean their tables. They just might not all do it very promptly. If you see shit on a table, don’t use that table. You should also complain to the management because that would be just disgusting. But what if shit is there but you DONT see it? Enjoy your meal. Do you still want my visually shit free hand tossed salad? Its on the house and shit. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/227 "2010-05-24T19:33:47Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > If you see shit on a table, don’t use that table. ::scribbling furiously:: OK, but what if I see a bear? What do I do then? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/228 "2010-05-24T19:38:47Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > But what if shit is there but you DONT see it? Invisible shit? I guess that could happen with any table. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/229 "2010-05-24T19:55:46Z")
Shit happens. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/230 "2010-05-24T19:56:56Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Invisible shit? I guess that could happen with any table. Well, yeah. Toddler experiences leak from diaper, parent wipes it up with napkins, fecal bacteria remain on table despite no obvious brown smear. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/231 "2010-05-24T20:04:02Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Invisible shit? I guess that could happen with any table. Its WAY more likely on the ones that have had baby asses on them. That, or some of your recent posts. And I see you still arent taking me up on your invisible shit salad either. ---
**Author:** ![C3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/c3/32/3108_2.png) [@C3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C3)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/232 "2010-05-24T20:11:24Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Its WAY more likely on the ones that have had baby asses on them. That, or some of your recent posts. > > And I see you still arent taking me up on your invisible shit salad either. Considering we’re right in the middle of (another) e.coli-contaminated lettuce outbreak, I thought it was a given that there was shit in the salads. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/233 "2010-05-24T20:17:36Z")
What would be the need in the first place to sit a child on a table ? I’m not as grossed out by a clothed infant in his/her shit bag on the table, still think it’s an odd thing to do. But a kid in a diaper on the table is totally disgusting. According to some people its simple just avoid tables with shit on it. I’ll try to remeber to bring my field kit so I can swab for microscopic fecal bacteria in order to avoid another case of campylobacter. Or just keep your baby’s ass off the table. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/234 "2010-05-24T21:37:35Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Its WAY more likely on the ones that have had baby asses on them. Cite that it’s more likely to be on the seat of a baby’s pants than on somebody’s bare hands? Do you eat directly off the surface of the table anyway? By the way, did you know there’s shit in the hamburgers as well as the lettuce? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/235 "2010-05-24T21:41:21Z")
> [@Ibanez](#): > > What would be the need in the first place to sit a child on a table ? Any number of reasons, especially if they can’t stand up yet. Generally I’ve done it if I needed them elevated to shoe them or put a coat on them or clean their hands and face, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/236 "2010-05-24T22:08:20Z")
If food service workers are officially prohibited by Department of Health sanitation requirements from sitting on tables even when clothed, ISTM that it would be a good idea for everybody else to keep their asses, and their babies’ asses, off the tables too, whether clothed or not. [An example:](http://www.ci.the-colony.tx.us/Depts/Planning/Health/Documents/Guidelines_SeasonalHealthPermits.pdf) > [@](#): > > G. Sanitation in Seasonal Health Establishments: > > 1. All seasonal facilities in which open food will be handled or prepared will be required to have convenient hand washing and utensil washing facilities. The size, type, and number of sink compartments will depend upon the type of operation and will be determined by the Health Authority. > > 2. Food handling personnel must wash hands as frequently as necessary, even though disposable gloves may be used and are recommended. > > 3. Those facilities which are in operation and that sell non-packed, potentially hazardous foods must provide both hot and cold running water from a commercially-constructed permanently plumbed handwashing sink and 3 compartment sink for cleaning and sanitizing utensils and equipment. > > 4. Those establishments which are in operation and that sell non-packed, potentially hazardous foods must use NSF or equivalent refrigeration and/or hot holding equipment with approved power source. > > 5. The use of tobacco, eating food or drinking beverages is prohibited in food preparation and food service areas. Sitting on tables and counters is prohibited. Emphasis added. It also seems logical to me that if you **have** to briefly put a baby’s ass on an eating table for some reason, you should put a garment or a napkin or something under it. I don’t really care how clean you personally believe your baby’s clothed diapered ass to be; if your baby’s ass is somewhere that the Department of Health officially states that asses should not be put, then I personally would prefer you to keep your baby’s ass somewhere else, or if that’s not possible, at least not directly on the table surface itself. I don’t care in the least if you want to sit your baby (or change your baby’s diaper, for that matter) on your **own** dining-room table. But deliberately ignoring hygiene rules about “no asses on eating tables” in public food service establishments just because you can get away with it seems kind of douchebaggy. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/237 "2010-05-24T23:10:32Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > They all clean their tables. They just might not all do it very promptly. If you see shit on a table, don’t use that table. You should also complain to the management because that would be just disgusting. Better yet – how about not patronizing that restaurant? ---
**Author:** ![Peanut\_Gallery](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/838e76/32.png) [@Peanut\_Gallery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peanut_Gallery)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/238 "2010-05-25T00:52:38Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > In going back and reading the first page again, I can see… > > [snip] > > much confusion. My bad. Thanks for that. I was so puzzled by the fact that you couldn’t see the confusion coming out of posts 3 & 4 that I read 5 pages of this poppy-pants thread to see if it would hit you. I’m free! ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/239 "2010-05-25T01:44:16Z")
This thread proves the following once again: It’s a good thing for the rest of us that most of the people who don’t want or have kids feel the way they do. Also, Dio and I probably couldn’t agree on the color of the sky, so I hate when threads like this come along and I have to be on the guy’s side. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435/240 "2010-05-25T01:46:29Z")
> [@Rand Rover](#): > > I hate when threads like this come along and I have to be on the guy’s side. Yeah, ordinarily I’d feel sorry for him, but I have to say that this time I think he earned it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-babys-dirty-ass-off-the-restaurant-table/540435.md?page=13)