# Get Your Freaking Light-Years Right! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 9, 2007, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352 "2007-05-09T03:27:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![David\_Simmons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9de053/32.png) [@David\_Simmons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/David_Simmons)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/21 "2007-05-09T15:39:36Z")
[QUOTE=Baldwin] In the old “Twilight Zone” show, I don’t know how many times some imaginary Earthlike planet was described as being, say, “80 million miles from Earth!”. [/QUOTE] Over and over in such programs, and not just the _Twilight Zone,_ planets are spoken of as being 200, or 400 million or even a couple of billion miles from earth as if those were a long distances. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/22 "2007-05-09T15:41:32Z")
[QUOTE=Plynck] Good for you, OP. Fight the good fight. Give 'em an inch, and they’ll take an hour. [/QUOTE] Give them six inches, and they’ll take half of that time. What bugs me is in Star Trek IV when Scottie complains that he’s travelled millions of miles to get to Earth. Sheesh, at least! ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/23 "2007-05-09T15:41:51Z")
Here’s an idea for writers. If you plan to use “light years” in a sentence, first substitute the words “miles” and “days.” If one of them makes sense in terms of meaning, light years will work too. Examples: The newest version of the vibrator will be ready miles ahead the competition. or The newest version of the vibrator will be ready days ahead of the competition. Now, I’ll grant there are ways in which either could be correct, since both vibrators could be developed by traveling sex workers in the back of a moving RV, but the second is more likely to be the common usage. ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/24 "2007-05-09T15:53:41Z")
[QUOTE=mischievous] If I had a camera with me, I would take a picture of the sign that is one of the elevators at work. Lacking one, I’ll describe it to you. The sign reads something like this: **During ongoing construction the fifth floor is “absolutely restricted” to construction workers “only”. Approximate duration of work: 5 months.** Quotation marks theirs, but that’s a whole different topic. [ul][li]Someone has crossed out the word “months”, and written in “years” above in black ink.[/li] [li]Someone else has added “light-” in front of “years” in blue ink.[/li] [li]Yet a third person has (at right angles to the rest of this) drawn an arrow to “light-” and added the comment “This is a measure of length, idiot!”.[/li] [li]And a fourth person has drawn an arrow to the above comment and labeled it “Dork.”[/ul][/li] Every time I see that sign I get the giggles. mischievous [/QUOTE] If the length of your dork can be measured in light years, is that soft or hard? ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/25 "2007-05-09T16:05:47Z")
[QUOTE=Nava] Back when I was a High School nerd (rather than just a nerd), there were a series of conferences in town to which several of us nerds went. One of them was by an astrophysicist. He spent the whole conference referring to stuff that was happening XYZ lightyears away as if it was happening there _now_. My question was something like “what we see now in spots that are a million lightyears away is light that was emitted a million years ago, so… how do we know that what’s a million lightyears away now doesn’t look like our immediate environment? Isn’t looking at stuff a million lightyears away more like looking into the past than like looking into the distance?” Poor guy never understood the question, but the other nerds present in the audience did understand it just fine! [/QUOTE] Well, i have trouble believing that the guy didn’t understand your question, especially if he was, as you say, an astrophysicist. If he seemed confused, it might be because he was thinking, “Who would ask such a purposely obtuse and pointless question?” As **Bricker** said, your question was functionally meaningless. Given that light speed is pretty much the universe’s speed limit, and we only have information about distant galaxies based on the light from them that arrives at Earth, it seems perfectly reasonable to talk about occurrences we witness there as happening in the present tense. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/26 "2007-05-09T18:28:13Z")
[QUOTE=mischievous] **During ongoing construction the fifth floor is “absolutely restricted” to construction workers “only”. Approximate duration of work: 5 months.** Quotation marks theirs, but that’s a whole different topic. [/QUOTE] Maybe I’m a confused here wouldn’t that statement mean that the only people not allowed onto the 5th floor would be construction workers?? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/27 "2007-05-09T18:40:19Z")
[QUOTE=CalMeacham] And the 1970-era Cylons are only 5 microns away! [/QUOTE] We visited Cylon, once. In 1970. For 20 centons. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/28 "2007-05-09T19:15:32Z")
[QUOTE=tomndebb] HAH! As soon as we figure out a way to deliver ansibles through wormholes, we’ll be able to get real time reports whenver we need them. [/QUOTE] Yeah, but you’ll need a twelve-light-year-old kid to coordinate the ansibles. ---
**Author:** ![lowbrass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dc4da7/32.png) [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/29 "2007-05-09T19:23:35Z")
Confusing the meaning of light-years is the penultimate mistake in sci-fi writing. ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/30 "2007-05-09T19:30:27Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass] Confusing the meaning of light-years is the penultimate mistake in sci-fi writing. [/QUOTE] Then what’s the ultimate mistake? ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/31 "2007-05-09T19:37:46Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass] Confusing the meaning of light-years is the penultimate mistake in sci-fi writing. [/QUOTE] That’s totally irregardless. ---
**Author:** ![mischievous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@mischievous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mischievous)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/32 "2007-05-09T20:09:57Z")
[QUOTE=Hampshire] Maybe I’m a confused here wouldn’t that statement mean that the only people not allowed onto the 5th floor would be construction workers?? [/QUOTE] Yes. That’s what it says. I have chosen not to try to correct the signs I find in my elevators, but some of the suggestions here are tempting. mischievous ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/33 "2007-05-09T20:25:48Z")
[QUOTE=mischievous] If I had a camera with me, I would take a picture of the sign that is one of the elevators at work. Lacking one, I’ll describe it to you. [/QUOTE] Please, you HAVE to take a camera with you to work tomorrow. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/34 "2007-05-09T20:25:51Z")
[QUOTE=David Simmons] Over and over in such programs, and not just the _Twilight Zone,_ planets are spoken of as being 200, or 400 million or even a couple of billion miles from earth as if those were a long distances. [/QUOTE] Not long distances? _You_ try doing that commute every day, smart guy. ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/35 "2007-05-09T20:43:26Z")
[QUOTE=mischievous] Yes. That’s what it says. I have chosen not to try to correct the signs I find in my elevators, but some of the suggestions here are tempting. [/QUOTE] If you don’t mess with that sign, you’re going to have to change your user name. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/36 "2007-05-09T21:01:47Z")
[QUOTE=CalMeacham] You’re somewhat mixed up. “The Nine Bllion names of God” is a short story by Arthur C. Clarke, but neither it nor any of the stories in his anthology of that name have the plot you describe. The plot you describe belongs to Theodore Sturgeon’s “Microcosmic God”, which, like, The Nine Billion Names of God is a classic SF short story. They might even both be in the same anthology somewhere (“The Science Fiction Hall of Fame I”?), which might explain your running them together. [/QUOTE] Yup. My bad. I’m guessing I just combined a couple of the many anthologies I’ve read. Anyway, my point has been made. ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/37 "2007-05-09T21:35:24Z")
Man, I could sure use about 481,771,358,600,000,000,000,000 amu of aspirin right now. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/38 "2007-05-09T21:52:48Z")
[QUOTE=asterion] Then what’s the ultimate mistake? [/QUOTE] 43? ---
**Author:** ![nameless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/779978/32.png) [@nameless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nameless)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/39 "2007-05-09T21:57:22Z")
[QUOTE=Yeticus Rex] Man, I could sure use about 481,771,358,600,000,000,000,000 amu of aspirin right now. [/QUOTE] Did… did you just convert 800 mg of acetylsalicylic acid acid to amu? You, sir, are a loser. I also am a loser for checking that. ---
**Author:** ![David\_Simmons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9de053/32.png) [@David\_Simmons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/David_Simmons)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352/40 "2007-05-09T22:12:55Z")
[QUOTE=Biffy the Elephant Shrew] Not long distances? _You_ try doing that commute every day, smart guy. [/QUOTE] Phhht. Such distances are just down the street. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/get-your-freaking-light-years-right/403352.md?page=3)