# Getting rid of Scott **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 12, 2003, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/getting-rid-of-scott/181329 "2003-06-12T14:38:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 3\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/getting-rid-of-scott/181329/21 "2003-06-13T19:59:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zabali\_Clawbane \* > \*\ ***RickJay** that’s not love, that’s merely lust. Love involves accepting things about the other person that aren’t going to change. Sounds to me that he’s asking her to change, giving her flack for her established personality etc. He admitted he’s only dating her because “she’s so attactive”. It’s just his dick talking, not his heart. \*\* Without more evidence, neither you nor I know either way. Hence the use of the word “Maybe” in my post. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/getting-rid-of-scott/181329/22 "2003-06-13T23:23:07Z")
_As **Astro** takes the Pit a little too seriously…_ Obviously **Astro** wandered off to find the meds. Hey, he stood her up a few days ago. Told her he’d take her out, would be over in a few minutes, just had to iron his shirt. Half hour later she’s ready to go. He’s still ironing the shirt. Two yours later she calls him. 11pm. He’s still busy and won’t make it after all. He can call her every half hour while she’s visiting friends, but he can’t call to tell her he won’t make the date??? He tried to make a date to take her to a strip joint tonight. Sure, he _claims_ he didn’t know it was such a place, but hell man, it’s the oldest strip joint in town. She sure knew what it was! ++ And yes, I know that we have to keep our mouths shut and allow her to make her own mistakes. We just hear everything because my wife is her confidant. I have never spoken directly to her about this issue. I just think the guy is a complete and total asshole, undeserving of her attentions. She can do much better. ---
**Author:** ![Scotticher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Scotticher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scotticher)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/getting-rid-of-scott/181329/23 "2003-06-14T03:08:29Z")
I’m sure she CAN do much better. But she evidentally doesn’t choose to do so. There isn’t much you can do about it…you have told her what you think, and she is evidentally not interested in making a move. For what it is worth, (which is not much, I know) this guy sounds like scum. I hope she comes to her senses soon. BUT…again, you and your wife should just keep your mouths shut. I have a way I deal with this sort of thing. When one of my friends gets into an entirely stupid relationship, I tactfully give them my opinion. They invariably (of course) ignore my advice. So from then on, I am entirely neutral. They talk about the beloved… I say things like “Really?” and “Oh.” I am sure you get the drift. I sure don’t want to encourage the relationship, but I don’t want to drive my friend away, either. It is very hard. But worth it…because they ALWAYS come back broken hearted…and I don’t want them to feel they CAN’T come to me…because I might say (even without words) “I TOLD YOU SO!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/getting-rid-of-scott/181329.md?page=1)