# Giant Battle Monsters, featuring Guinastasia and Libertarian. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 25, 2003, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801 "2003-09-25T18:11:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/41 "2003-10-08T05:06:42Z")
Surprisingly, the outcome of the California recall would not have been significantly different had Gray Davis been [a giant four-armed ape with a ray gun.](http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Arnold+Schwartzenegger&def=Gray+Davis&a=S) ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/42 "2003-10-08T05:12:11Z")
Gah. Just did my user name. Miller is a Tiny Blob that came from Another Planet, can Change Colour, and has a Long Neck. Strength: 1 Agility: 1 Intelligence: 1 Pathetic. I hate these internet name games; I always get the crappy result. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/43 "2003-10-08T06:33:22Z")
kaylasdad99 is an Average-Sized Squid that is Susceptible to Hey, that’s Classified! shoots Laser Beams, swallows Aeroplanes Whole, Screeches when Angry, and has a Humorous Nephew Sidekick. Strength: 4 Agility: 3 Intelligence: 8 Not exactly the most formidable in physical appearance, but when attacking using Intelligence, I bested the Libertarian, and the Guinistasia both; and with Agility, I even managed to out-perform the planet-sized Raibd\_Squirrel. A correctly spelled Rabid\_Squirrel, however having a very nice set of 11’s across the board, kicked my sorry ass six ways from Sunday. Time to go see how I can improve my skills with a little judiciously-wielded dysgraphia. ---
**Author:** ![Freyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freyr/32/5763_2.png) [@Freyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freyr)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/44 "2003-10-08T06:35:08Z")
> [@](#): > > Freyr is a Giant Man-Eating Plant that swats Aeroplanes like Flies, is Very Slow, and has Prehensile Eyes, a Terrible Roar and Suckers on its Feet. Oh man! Prehensile eyes! Dig it! > [@](#): > > Strength: 6 > Agility: 3 > Intelligence: 4 Fear me! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/45 "2003-10-08T06:38:26Z")
Ooooh, check out **kayladsad99**! kayladsad99 is a Collosal Ant that CANNOT BE STOPPED, can turn Invisible and Generate Electricity, is in League with Dark Forces, and has a Computer for a Brain. Strength: 13 Agility: 5 Intelligence: 15 ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/46 "2003-10-11T20:55:22Z")
**Ilsa\_Lund** is a Giant Dragon that has a Long Neck, and looks like a Man in a Rubber Suit. ---
**Author:** ![Taran](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Taran](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taran)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/47 "2003-10-11T21:31:32Z")
[Metamonster](http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Squid+is+a+Giant+Ant+that+lives+Underwater%2C+breathes+Fire%2C+is+Worshipped+as+a+God%2C+and+has+a+Terrible+Roar+and+Enormous+Tusks+is+a+Giant+Ant+that+lives+beneath+New+York%2C+emits+Ultrasonic+Screams%2C+controls+Human+Thought%2C+has+four+Extra+Limbs+and+a+Metal+Jaw%2C+and+eats+Trees+is+a+Human-Sized+Man-Eating+Plant+that+Stomps+Around+a+Lot%2C+can+Phase+in+and+out+of+Existence%2C+cowers+from+Fire%2C+and+has+Very+Sharp+Fangs+and+a+Toughened+Steel+Skeleton.+is+an+Average-Sized+Ape+that+is+Highly+Flammable%2C+emits+Clouds+of+Inky+Smoke%2C+and+Screeches+when+Angry.+is+a+Giant+Ant+that+is+Just+Trying+to+Get+Home%2C+Expands+when+Attacked%2C+and+cowers+from+Radiation.+is+an+Average-Sized+Ape+that+can+Generate+Electricity%2C+Freezes+Solid+when+Cold%2C+and+has+Crablike+Pincers.+is+a+Giant+Man-Eating+Plant+that+swats+Aeroplanes+like+Flies%2C+cowers+from+Radiation%2C+is+Wreathed+with+Flames%2C+and+has+Bulletproof+Skin.+is+a+Giant+Robot+that+can+turn+Invisible%2C+Freezes+Solid+when+Cold%2C+and+has+Tough+Leathery+Skin+and+a+Single+Giant+Eye.+is+a+Giant+Moth+that+Glows+in+the+Dark%2C+is+Wreathed+with+Flames%2C+carries+a+Flamethrower%2C+and+has+Enormous+Tusks+and+a+Humorous+Nephew+Sidekick.+is+a+Tiny+Lizard+that+is+Just+Trying+to+Get+Home%2C+Freezes+Solid+when+Cold%2C+Hovers+Eerily%2C+and+has+Suckers+on+its+Feet+and+a+Humorous+Nephew+Sidekick.+is+a+Giant+Moth+that+came+Back+in+Time+from+the+29th+Century%2C+can+turn+Invisible%2C+Expands+when+Attacked%2C+has+Prehensile+Eyes%2C+and+looks+like+a+Man+in+a+Rubber+Suit.+is+a+Human-Sized+Man-Eating+Plant+that+spins+Vast+Webs%2C+Expands+when+Attacked%2C+is+Covered+with+a+Thick+Slime%2C+fires+Rockets%2C+and+has+Black-and-White+Stripes.+is+a+Giant+Man-Eating+Plant+that+lives+Underwater%2C+is+Covered+in+Bumps+and+Nodules+and+Covered+with+a+Thick+Slime%2C+moves+at+Great+Speed%2C+and+looks+like+a+Man+in+a+Rubber+Suit.&def=&a=S) [sub]and I sure hope I did the URL right…[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/48 "2003-10-19T02:47:16Z")
Dr. Rieux is a Giant Lizard that drinks Human Blood, and has Prehensile Eyes and a Long Neck. Strength: 10 Agility: 5 Intelligence: 4 ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2003, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/49 "2003-10-19T05:04:57Z")
> [@](#): > > ResIpsaLoquitor is a Giant Bee that breathes Poisonous Gas, was brought back from a Distant Volcanic Island, emits Clouds of Inky Smoke, has Staring Red Eyes and four Extra Limbs, and spits Ice. Crap…maybe I can sell honey nut cheerios on the side, too. > [@](#): > > Strength: 3 > Agility: 7 > Intelligence: 7 Bow down before my superior brain power! You in the back…you’re not bowing! ---
**Author:** ![Atomic\_Badger\_Racing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@Atomic\_Badger\_Racing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atomic_Badger_Racing)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2003, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/50 "2003-10-19T09:51:13Z")
> [@](#): > > Strength: 7 > Agility: 1 > Intelligence: 9 > > AtomicBadgerRacing is a Giant Squid that breathes Poisonous Gas, dissolves in Water, and is Covered in Bumps and Nodules, Very Slow and Susceptible to Electrical Damage. Meh… ---
**Author:** ![Atomic\_Badger\_Racing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@Atomic\_Badger\_Racing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atomic_Badger_Racing)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2003, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/51 "2003-10-19T09:52:46Z")
Oh wait, I forgot the spaces. > [@](#): > > Strength: 8 > Agility: 7 > Intelligence: 10 > > Atomic Badger Racing is a Giant Dragon that is Undead, controls Human Thought, and has Acid for Blood, Very Sharp Fangs and a Swirly Hypnotic Gaze. That’s… slightly better. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/52 "2003-10-22T07:29:12Z")
> [@](#): > > Gyrate is a Giant Blob that breathes Fire, spits Ice, has a single Horn on its Forehead, and eats Metal. > > Strength: 11 > Agility: 1 > Intelligence: 2 > > Cold Attack! > Fire Attack! So I’m not very bright, but I can lift real heavy stuff. Weyhey! Actually, if I’m a Giant Blob, where exactly _is_ my forehead? ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2003, 9:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801/53 "2003-10-26T09:04:00Z")
Strength: 8 Agility: 9 Intelligence: 3 torie is a Giant Lizard that shoots Laser Beams, moves at Great Speed, and eats Nuclear Waste and Metal. _i’m stupid_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giant-battle-monsters-featuring-guinastasia-and-libertarian/203801.md?page=2)