# Giggly? Jiggly? No—Gigli!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [August 1, 2003, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357 "2003-08-01T14:06:44Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 5
### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/81 "2003-08-04T13:24:54Z")
Yeah, but there are only eight films out there this weekend. According to AP,
The Ben Affleck-Jennifer Lopez movie “Gigli” debuted dismally following weeks of toxic buzz and near-unanimous critical revulsion. The comedy about a gangster who falls in love with a lesbian rival during a kidnapping earned $3.8 million. “This is not a shock,” said Tom Sherak, a partner in Revolution Studios, which produced “Gigli” for Sony Pictures Entertainment . . . “I’ve seen a lot worse movies,” Sherak said. “Hey, is it the best movie ever made? Ehh, I don’t think so. … You move on. Look, the picture cost $54 million. So everyone is going to get hurt a bit.”
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### Author:  [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/82 "2003-08-04T13:33:26Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Amanita \*
> \*\*I was thinking that the “turkey, gobble, gobble” idiocy was referencing the urban-legendy use of turkey basters by lesbians for insemination purposes. I guess that goes to show the level of discourse I expected from this “film.” :rolleyes: \*\*
I was thinking that the line was a throwback to the old joke about the woman tattooing “Thanksgiving” and “Christmas” on her inner thighs because her husband said there was never anything good to eat between Thanksgiving and Christmas.
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### Author:  [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/83 "2003-08-04T14:48:57Z")
I hadn’t heard of this film until now, and to be honest I opened this thread expecting something about old Italian tenor Beniamino Gigli. Heigh ho.
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### Author:  [@B.Serum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Serum)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/84 "2003-08-04T17:52:02Z")
I have to confess…
I’m starting to want to see it.
To relish the sight of two over-exposed, over-rated stars fall on their faces.
To see just how horrible a film can be, especially one that can’t blame it’s awfulness on a low budget.
Of course, if I ever do, I’ll buy a ticket for one of the other features that’s showing. at that theater. I wouldn’t want to encourage these people.
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### Author:  [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/85 "2003-08-04T18:21:23Z")
Why not just wait for the video, **Hey you!**? Or even better, get it one two-for-one night at the video store.
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### Author:  [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/86 "2003-08-04T18:42:40Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by capacitor \*
> \*\*On the other hand, in thirteen days, _Shaolin Soccer_ comes to NYC! \*\*
i finally saw the trailor for that in front of Spy Kids 3d, and it scared me because they showed most of the cool effects, the dubbing sounds really bad, and i fear they may have turned one of the best movies ever made into just an average flick. I’ll still go see it so it will be supported and maybe we can get more asian films in theaters, but don’t be surprised if i sneak out and into another theater instead. I had to watch my DVD of Shaolin soccer to get the bad taste from the trailer out of my mouth.
And this thread has made me want to see Gigli!
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### Author:  [@gonzoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzoron)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/87 "2003-08-04T18:46:44Z")
Am I the only one who found the tabasco sauce and charmin jokes in the trailer to be funny? It doesn’t look THAT bad from the trailer. No worse than Maid in Manhattan or Forces of Nature. Bad to be sure, but not like these reviews…
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### Author:  [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/88 "2003-08-04T19:36:14Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by gonzoron \*
> \*\*It doesn’t look THAT bad from the trailer. No worse than Maid in Manhattan or Forces of Nature. \*\*
Exactly.
😉
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### Author:  [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/89 "2003-08-04T20:11:08Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \*
> \*\*So basically, she’s playing, what do they call it, “Lesbian until graduation” or something like that? \*\*
At Sarah Lawrence, they used to call em Freshman Dykes. ( not my wording, honest ).
I spent an eternity one afternoon with Ms. Lopez, shooting her for an Access Hollywood prime time special a few years ago. At that point, she was still romantically connected with a man who was on trial for playing with loaded guns at crowded parties.
:eek:
Cartooniverse
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### Author:  [@Agrippina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agrippina)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/90 "2003-08-04T20:21:15Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Hey you! \*
> **To relish the sight of two over-exposed, over-rated stars fall on their faces.
> To see just how horrible a film can be, especially one that can’t blame it’s awfulness on a low budget.**
You know this will be one of those historic-making bad movies. It’ll be mentioned in trivia books years to come right next to other big budget flops like _Ishtar_, _The Postman_, _Cutthroat Island_, _Cleopatra_, and _Caligula_. In another ten years, 20-somethings with a love-affair with really bad movies will rent it and it’ll become some sort of underground cult classic. But not one of those cult classics where the stars are proud of the movie like _Rocky Horror Picture Show_.
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### Author:  [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/91 "2003-08-04T20:26:12Z")
**Rabid Child** , you just gave me an idea for how to make “Gigli” better:
Reshoot it with all parts played by Tim Curry.
How could it go wrong?
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### Author:  [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/92 "2003-08-04T21:01:00Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by ElwoodCuse \*
> \*\*Alessan: in a film class I took once, I got read an essay by Ebert on _Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!_ It was an interesting read, to say the least. \*\*
The films of Russ Meyer figured prominently in a lecture I attended a couple of years ago given by noted feminist (and lesbian) film writer [Ruby Rich](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0822321211/qid=1060031128/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/103-7043617-7059048?v=glance&s=books). Weirdly enough, she _enjoyed_ them and was offering them as positive examples without (much) irony. Rather an eye-opening talk.
Oh, and re _Gigli_, even though I see absolutely everything, I may make an exception for this one.
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### Author:  [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/93 "2003-08-04T21:08:01Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Governor Quinn \*
> \*\ ***Rabid Child** , you just gave me an idea for how to make “Gigli” better:
>
> Reshoot it with all parts played by Tim Curry.
>
> How could it go wrong? \*\*
Or Meatloaf.
_That_ would be a sight to behold. Meatloaf laying on the bed, spreading his legs, telling Meatloaf “It’s turkey time. Come on, gobble gobble.”
Happy
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### Author:  [@SmackFu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmackFu)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/94 "2003-08-04T22:53:46Z")
Anyone on this thread actually SEE this movie?
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### Author:  [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2003, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/95 "2003-08-04T23:33:07Z")
Does it matter?
-sigh- Yes, of course it matters. I will be glad to spend the 3.50 to rent this thing. I won't chuck out 8.00 in a movie theatre.
A man has his pride, you know.
😃
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### Author:  [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)
#### Post date: [August 5, 2003, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/96 "2003-08-05T04:56:20Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Tars Tarkas \*
> **i finally saw the trailor for [Shaolin Soccer]…and it scared me because they showed most of the cool effects, the dubbing sounds really bad, and i fear they may have turned one of the best movies ever made into just an average flick.**
Posted today at [http://www.kungfucinema.com/news/2003-08-04-05.htm](http://www.kungfucinema.com/news/2003-08-04-05.htm)
* * *
“Miramax …has sat on the film while applying numerous edits in an attempt to market the comedy to Western audiences. Original changes included renaming the film Kung Fu Soccer (this change was never finalized), re-dubbing the film into English, cutting at least 20 minutes, adding one previously cut scene, and adding new music to the soundtrack.”
However, the article says that now the
“ **planned wide release of an edited version of the martial arts comedy Shaolin Soccer has been cancelled**. In its place, the company will put into limited release, the original Cantonese language version with subtitles. This decision comes after a test screening of Miramax’s dubbed version in Calgary, Canada apparently flopped.”
(my emphasis)
When will Miramax (and others) finally learn that very few people want to see bastardized versions of Asian films???
Of course, the limited release will likely allow this film to fade into the woodwork, thereby “proving” to Miramax that the original version won’t sell.
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### Author:  [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)
#### Post date: [August 5, 2003, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/97 "2003-08-05T23:39:23Z")
I’m not sure if that is good or bad news (like pretty much anything i hear about this project–except renaming it Kung Fu Soccer, i was opposed to that a year ago!). Maybe i’ll finally get to see it in theaters when it comes out, there are enough asians in this town it will make money here.
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### Author:  [@ricksummon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ricksummon)
#### Post date: [August 6, 2003, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/98 "2003-08-06T00:32:50Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Is this movie so bad that it is worth of a MST3K viewing?
As of 8/5/03, **Gigli** is the #1 movie on the IMDB’s Bottom 100 list, pushing the ever-popular **Manos: The Hands of Fate** down to #3. The IMDB News also notes that as soon as Ben Affleck’s promotional contract for **Gigli** expired, even **he** admitted the movie was a mistake.
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### Author:  [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)
#### Post date: [August 6, 2003, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/99 "2003-08-06T01:11:11Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by BraheSilver \*
> \*\*Next time Crunchy Frog offers to take a movie-watching bullet for us, I expect we’ll know what to ask for, eh? 😉 \*\*
Hey, the link is at the bottom of my posts (some of them anyway). I’m still willing to do the movie bullets, but there hasn’t been mush interest lately, and I didn’t want to be the one to bump my own thread. As soon as this goes to video (which should be any day now from the sound of things) I’ll watch it for you.
And for those wondering, I’m _still_ trying to find a copy of Freddy Got Fingered for the next bullet review. And back in the origianl thread, someone requested I watch _Rick Oh, the Story fo Rickey_ and _I Spit on Your Grave_. I’ve found the former (whihc was surprisingly rented out at the time) and have a line on where to get the latter. New bullet reviews coming soon, possibly this weekend!
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### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [August 6, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giggly-jiggly-no-gigli/192357/100 "2003-08-06T04:45:26Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Eve \*
> \*\*Yeah, but there are only eight films out there this weekend. According to AP,
>
> The Ben Affleck-Jennifer Lopez movie “Gigli” debuted dismally following weeks of toxic buzz and near-unanimous critical revulsion. The comedy about a gangster who falls in love with a lesbian rival during a kidnapping earned $3.8 million. “This is not a shock,” said Tom Sherak, a partner in Revolution Studios, which produced “Gigli” for Sony Pictures Entertainment . . . “I’ve seen a lot worse movies,” Sherak said. “Hey, is it the best movie ever made? Ehh, I don’t think so. … You move on. Look, the picture cost $54 million. So everyone is going to get hurt a bit.” \*\*
It took in $3.8 _million_, which puts it behind _Finding Nemo_, a _fish_ movie, featuring a lesbian, doing the voice for a _ **blue tang** fish_. I think that says something.
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