# Girl at my work **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 4, 2016, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074 "2016-07-04T15:57:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2016, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074/81 "2016-07-07T17:46:24Z")
> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#): > > I doubt this woman’s boyfriend would take news of friendly lunches with some guy with a crush on her so lightly. And he’d be in the right. > > The OP should back off and find someone else for his attentions, pronto. His intentions for this woman are nowhere near plain friendliness, and he shouldn’t pretend that they are. There are boyfriends and boyfriends. She could be living with him, in which case she should have said something, or she could be dating him once a week and getting tired of him. If you are attracted to someone who is married, it is a good idea to stay away. But I don’t see any moral problems with asking someone out who you’ve heard has a boyfriend. Sure he may not like it. Tough. He doesn’t get to own her and her work relationships. ---
**Author:** ![tullsterx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tullsterx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tullsterx)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2016, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074/82 "2016-07-08T13:19:25Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > There is so much wrong with this post here, I don’t even know where to begin. Oh! I’m sorry I’ve been doing it wrong all these years, but it’s really worked out well. ---
**Author:** ![Pedro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/919ad9/32.png) [@Pedro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pedro)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2016, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074/83 "2016-07-08T13:45:34Z")
She might have a boyfriend like she might have brothers and sisters, whatever. Irrelevant. You don’t need to make that decision for her, you just need to respect her boundaries. If she drops the boyfriend into the conversation a lot that’s a clear boundary to keep it friendly. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2016, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074/84 "2016-07-08T17:30:53Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Well, for me, it’s easy. There isn’t a girl on this planet capable of making me pine for her because I’m so in love with my GF. Wait! You have a girlfriend? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2016, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074/85 "2016-07-08T18:26:30Z")
I have never in my time on the dope seen him mention a girlfriend, anywhere, so I’m a bit skeptical too. ---
**Author:** ![Gladys\_Overnow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@Gladys\_Overnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gladys_Overnow)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2016, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074/86 "2016-07-09T12:56:37Z")
Hitting on people at work can quickly be seen as harassment. Better safe than sorry. Admire her from afar. If by chance she becomes available down the road, invite her to lunch - just the two of you. If she declines, then she’s not interested and you should back off asap and look elsewhere. The workplace is not a club/bar. If you want romance, don’t seek it at work. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/girl-at-my-work/759074.md?page=4)