# Giuliani has cancer (not a gag)! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 27, 2000, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540 "2000-04-27T16:42:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/1 "2000-04-27T16:42:00Z")
[http://ap.tbo.com/ap/breaking/MGIJIFJLK7C.html](http://ap.tbo.com/ap/breaking/MGIJIFJLK7C.html) I guess this will bring up a lot of mixed emotion posts (“I hate the guy, but . . .”), a few "good!"s and what-not. Just thought I’d inform the New Yorkers here that the Senate race just got more interesting . . . ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/2 "2000-04-28T05:17:00Z")
Oh boy, I get to be the first to start a new conspiracy theory: Hillary poisoned him with radioactive plutonium she was given by Chinese intelligence agents. This’ll be reported on the Rush Limbaugh show within a week. ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/3 "2000-04-28T05:24:00Z")
Part of me thinks: good. Maybe he’ll drop out of the race. The other part of me smacks the first part for being such a sadistic ass. * * * “I go on guilt trips a couple of time a year. Mom books them for me.” A custom made Wally .sig! ```auto My iguana's sick. He's all floppy. Could he have Reptile dysfunction? -Chef Troy, Haiku Master ``` ---
**Author:** ![curious\_george](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b487fb/32.png) [@curious\_george](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curious_george)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/4 "2000-04-28T05:32:00Z")
Rudy is not as bad off as Tom Green. That poor guy is so young to get Testecular cancer. ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/5 "2000-04-27T18:08:00Z")
I hate the guy, but…I’d wish on him maybe a really painful pimple on his ass or something like that instead. Rudy’s a putz, but I’m not entirely convinced that he’s evil. Just stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/6 "2000-04-27T18:13:00Z")
Yeah, this is one of those mixed-emotions “when bad things happen to bad people” situations. I hate Giuliani, but not THAT much. If he broke his arm or something I’d titter, but I wouldn’t wish this on him (or on us—we’re going to have to hear about RUDOLPH GIULINI’S COLON for the next few months!). Now, I have a hard time feeling sorry for Ronald Reagan, who almost single-handedly turned AIDS into the tragedy it is, by ignoring it for so long. ---
**Author:** ![neutron\_star](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/51bf81/32.png) [@neutron\_star](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neutron_star)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/7 "2000-04-27T18:33:00Z")
Guiliani has cancer. Yet more proof that if there is a god, he has a soft spot for pornography … and strikes out with furious vengence at those who try to suppress it. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Olentzero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/90ced4/32.png) [@Olentzero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Olentzero)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/8 "2000-04-27T18:40:00Z")
Guiliani’s a complete ass. I have nothing but contempt for the man. It’s unfortunate that he has something this serious but at least he has the ability to afford good care for himself, unlike the people he’s put on workfare. That said, I certainly don’t wish any suffering on him. The only bastard I’d gladly see suffer anything and everything that could possibly happen to him has been lying under a parking lot somewhere in Berlin for the last 55 years. * * * All I wanna do is to thank you, even though I don’t know who you are… ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/9 "2000-04-27T18:46:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Olentzero: > \*\*Guiliani’s a complete ass. > \*\* Not for long. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/10 "2000-04-27T19:02:00Z")
This reminds me of when Tricky Dick died, several years back…I was at a cocktail party, and the subject came up. A literary agent – a very distinguished, silver-haired, impeccably tweeded, Brit-accent-and-all literary agent – said “Too bad he died so soon…I wanted the son-of-a-bitch to go BLIND first.” Even in that roomful of professional snotty-East-Coast-intellectual-media-Nixon-hater types, there was a moment of embarrassed silence. * * * Uke ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/11 "2000-04-27T19:06:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by manhattan: > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > Originally posted by Olentzero: > > \*\*Guiliani’s a complete ass. > > \*\* > > Not for long. > > \*\* BWAHAHAHAHA! ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/12 "2000-04-27T19:10:00Z")
Damn, Mr. C beat me to it. LOL, manny! ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/13 "2000-04-27T20:12:00Z")
I hat Guliani with a **passion**. This has been noted elsewhere. I don’t know about the being of 2 minds thing either. Guliani is evil, he is not stupid as some other poster said. He deliberately tried to undermine New Yorkers 1st Amendment rights. He deliberately tried to change the New York Charter so that there could be no challenges to, what he’d hope would be, his dictatorship. He deliberately underfunded the summer work program so that it could die a “natural” death. He tried to close down all of the HHC emergency rooms. He has chased out every politician who disagreed publicly with him, no matter how good a job they were doing. I could go on. This cancer thing? It’s Karma. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/14 "2000-04-27T22:21:00Z")
Well, there ya go! I can now say to all of you doubters that prayer does indeed work! * * * Yer pal, Satan [http://www.raleighmusic.com/board/Images/devil.gif](http://www.raleighmusic.com/board/Images/devil.gif) _I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Two weeks, four days, 20 hours, 21 minutes and 19 seconds. 753 cigarettes not smoked, saving $94.24. Life saved: 2 days, 14 hours, 45 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![Olentzero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/90ced4/32.png) [@Olentzero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Olentzero)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/15 "2000-04-28T03:00:00Z")
Nice one, **manhattan**! I can’t believe I misspelled his name, either. Oh well. I gotta give some props to **Biggirl** over there for that sharp statement… I still wouldn’t wish cancer on anyone but I’m not gonna waste any tears for ol’ Rudy. * * * All I wanna do is to thank you, even though I don’t know who you are… ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/16 "2000-04-28T04:02:00Z")
Yeah, yeah, yeah, sympathy to the mayor and his family, best of luck, our prayers are with him, yada, yada, yada. Now the important question: How does this affect me? More specifically, if Rudy doesn’t run for the Senate, who will be the Republican candidate? ---
**Author:** ![NickyLarson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b2d939/32.png) [@NickyLarson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NickyLarson)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/17 "2000-04-28T04:07:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Ukulele Ike: > \*\*This reminds me of when Tricky Dick died, several years back…I was at a cocktail party, and the subject came up. > > A literary agent – a very distinguished, silver-haired, impeccably tweeded, Brit-accent-and-all literary agent – said “Too bad he died so soon…I wanted the son-of-a-bitch to go BLIND first.” > \*\* **I** wanted to dig him up and kill him again. Still do. * * * Cats are like Baptists. They raise hell but you’ll never catch them at it. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/18 "2000-04-28T04:07:00Z")
I would think Rick Lazio would step back into the race. It will be interesting to see what happens if Giuliani does bow out of the race. A lot of people were planning to vote for Hillary only because they hated Rudy so much. I wonder if those people would vote for Lazio. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/19 "2000-04-28T15:06:00Z")
Well, maybe most of you hate Rudy. As someone who has a vivid memory of the Dinkins years, I like having the guy for a mayor, and certainly wouldn’t mind having him for a senator (I miss the colorfulness of Al D’Amato…Chuck Schumer is such a drag, and the only thing I’d heard out of Moynahan in years was about his retirement!) Does he have his faults? Sure, who doesn’t? Be that as it may, he took a city that was mired in bureaucratic incompetence, cronyism and crime and replaced it with, if not a well-oiled living machine, then at least one of the most livable large cities in the US. Get well, Rudy. And if you feel you can’t keep up a Senate campaign, then do the right thing and starty pumping up Rick Lazio’s profile immediately. Lord knows you put it down enough to support your run. * * * Chaim Mattis Keller [ckeller@kozmo.com](mailto:ckeller@kozmo.com) “Sherlock Holmes once said that once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the answer. I, however, do not like to eliminate the impossible. The impossible often has a kind of integrity to it that the merely improbable lacks.” – Douglas Adams’s Dirk Gently, Holistic Detective ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540/20 "2000-04-28T15:33:00Z")
I dont know him or his politics but medical science is pretty spiffy these days & he should be fine with the choices he has. * * * “‘How do you know I’m mad’ said Alice. 'You must be, ’ said the Cat, ‘or you wouldn’t have come here.’” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/giuliani-has-cancer-not-a-gag/16540.md?page=2)