# Give me one reason why your ex is your ex.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [September 11, 2005, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092 "2005-09-11T11:35:20Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 6

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**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/101 "2005-09-13T03:28:38Z")

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She wanted to stay in France; I wanted to move back to the States. I suppose this is code for “After ten years, we were a bit tired of each other”.

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**Author:** ![ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/102 "2005-09-13T03:42:26Z")

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(Previously undiagnosed or perhaps ignored/neglected by her family) Borderline Personality Disorder.

From which stemmed all sorts of fun things like substance abuse of whatever substance was available, manipulative suicide threats/attempts, and the ability to only be somewhat functional one month out of every six.

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**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/103 "2005-09-13T19:25:54Z")

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Hawaii and California, while close, aren’t _that_ close.

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**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/104 "2005-09-13T19:53:09Z")

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We couldn’t communicate at all. It was if we were speaking two different languages. By the time we were able to learn each other’s language it was too late.

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**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/105 "2005-09-13T20:36:46Z")

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The near constant farting.

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**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/106 "2005-09-13T20:39:29Z")

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She was _boring_.

(This is not an easy thing to tell someone during a breakup.)

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**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/107 "2005-09-13T20:44:10Z")

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> [@niblet\_head](#):
>
> The near constant farting.

☹ But I still love you!

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**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/108 "2005-09-13T20:45:37Z")

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Then for chrissakes, stop eating so much goddamn cauliflower!!!

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**Author:** ![anu-la1979](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/47e85d/32.png) [@anu-la1979](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anu-la1979)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/109 "2005-09-13T20:55:23Z")

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His parents didn’t want us to get married because we were from different parts of India, I was from a higher caste, coming into a J.D. and was obviously an upwardly mobile career girl and not someone who would sit home pushing out squalling grandchildren.

He’s heir to millions, so he agreed.

Now I’m the lawyer and he’s unhappy. Ha!

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**Author:** ![meenie7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7993a0/32.png) [@meenie7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meenie7)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/110 "2005-09-13T21:41:24Z")

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Hmm, let’s see:

Girlfriend #1: We just sort of drifted apart, largely because it’s hard to have a successful relationship while pretending you’re not having one.

Boyfriend #1: He was unambitious, boring, and he smelled bad. (As far as I know, he is still years away from his BA, having been kicked out of at least one college for low grades, and is working menial jobs like being the cart boy at the supermarket.)

Boyfriend #2: He thought I was too unambitious, plus he was boring and he smelled bad. (my last contact with him consisted of him IMing me, after not contacting me once in the two years since we broke up, and asking a bunch of snotty questions about whether I still lived at home, was I still working at the same low-paying job, etc. I feel no regret at the fact that I proceeded to smugly inform him that I had gotten a major promotion at work, including a significant pay raise, despite the fact that I had contracted a chronic, debilitating illness, the symptoms of which I took care to describe in detail.)

(I can really pick 'em, eh?)

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**Author:** ![TheOnlySaneOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@TheOnlySaneOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheOnlySaneOne)\
**Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/111 "2005-09-13T22:15:24Z")

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We’ll go with the latest one:

Never had time to see each other, despite going to the same school.

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**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2005, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/112 "2005-09-14T05:59:59Z")

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#1. Cheated on me. With a girl in the same class (this was in high school).  
#2. Misunderstanding. We both thought the other wanted to break up. (In hindsight, though, I’m glad we broke up when we did. It wasn’t going anywhere anyway.)  
#3. Was only interested in me when I was at a vulnerably stage in my life. After I pulled my shit together he lost interest. Bastard.  
#4. Was secretly in love with the ex of my ex (#2).  
#5. Control freak, not to mention utterly boring.

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**Author:** ![Belrix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed655f/32.png) [@Belrix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belrix)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2005, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/113 "2005-09-14T18:59:23Z")

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In order (I think):

1. We “went together” for two days just to say we were (8th grade peer pressure)
2. I moved 1000 miles away (10th grade)
3. Differing religions (Baptist vs. Agnostic) (Freshman year)
4. I was stupid & scared of serious relationships & broke off a good thing
5. I was stupid & scared of serious relationships & broke off a pretty good thing
6. She started seeing someone else while I was away at college (ex-fiance)
7. The only person important to her was herself (ex-wife)
8. She was 10 years older than me and I had problems with that.
9. She was 100 lbs heavier than me and I had problems with that (plus she was bi-)
10. She hasn’t killed me yet (10 year anniv. coming up!)

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**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/114 "2005-09-14T19:04:20Z")

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She moved out.

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**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/115 "2005-09-15T16:54:41Z")

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**Ex #1:** I grew up and he didn’t. Or, more to the point, he _wouldn’t_ grow up, and I gave him plenty of chances.  
**Ex #2:** I was just the girl he was screwing until the girl he really wanted freed up. (Suuuper)  
**String of various guys who really weren’t that important in the long run:** Just wanted sex, and I wouldn’t give it up after being seriously broken by Ex #2.  
**Ex #3:** I think he was gay. I didn’t think he seemed all that interested in having me around, so I just left. When I found out he _really wasn’t_ all that interested in having me around, or really cared that I left, it made me sad.

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**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/116 "2005-09-15T17:14:01Z")

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Of the two that actually count:

1. Slept with my _four_ best friends and forgot to tell me he was engaged to someone back home.

2. Well … one reason is difficult. If you ask him about it these days (we’re still friends), his answer will be because he was stupid. I’m inclined to agree. 🙂 But _my_ one reason why it didn’t work–because he was stupid in a totally different way. I don’t like pretending not to be smart just so he won’t feel dumb.

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**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/117 "2005-09-15T18:02:58Z")

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#1 She hated my family and expected me to have no contact with them.

#2 She had reverse PMS i.e she was sane 1 week a month…

#3 She cheated on me.

#4 She was emotionally incontinent; EVERYTHING was the end of the world.

#5 We divorced after she moved several hundred miles away to go to grad school.

#6 She left one weekend while I was away w/o ever actually telling me why.

#7 I divorced her because I couldn’t deal with her abusive, obsessive-compulsive behavior for another moment.

#8 She ditched me because I have “too much pent up rage.”

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**Author:** ![ten9ten](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/82dd89/32.png) [@ten9ten](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ten9ten)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/118 "2005-09-15T18:20:46Z")

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Two minutes after I walked in the door from a weekend out of town, she said “I don’t think I want to play the wife roll anymore.”

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**Author:** ![Future\_Londonite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9dc877/32.png) [@Future\_Londonite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Future_Londonite)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/119 "2005-09-15T19:11:47Z")

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Ex #1 - we knew when we met that it wouldn’t be a lifetime deal. After 2yrs (to the day) we decided that whatever role/purpose we were meant to play in eachothers lives been fulfilled/played out so we called it quits  
Ex #2 - he decided he liked me better as a ‘best friend’ instead of ‘boyfriend’. He thought for a while that his feelings for me would intensify and justify us being boyfriends but it didn’t happen. So as not to lead me on he broke up with me.

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**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/give-me-one-reason-why-your-ex-is-your-ex/321092/120 "2005-09-15T19:12:03Z")

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I guess the main reason my ex is my ex is because of my ex-best-friend’s penis. :rolleyes:

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