# (Glorious, wonderful RO) Puppy killed for eyeballing owner's boyfriend **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 2, 2008, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385 "2008-12-02T20:33:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/41 "2008-12-03T17:45:46Z")
> [@Nikki\_Tikki\_Tavi](#): > > Useless trivia hijack: Did you know that chihuahuas have the largest brain in the canine kingdom, relative to size? I have a HUGE penis [sub](relative to the size of my wallet)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/42 "2008-12-03T17:52:37Z")
> [@](#): > > “I bet you a pork meal that I’ll cut off your balls if you step on my shadow.” > Then Juanito Yorick, being a Dubliner, stepped on his shadow and Moncho Mendez castrated him with a penknife but, not being greedy nor wanting to humiliate him, he forgave him the meal. > > - > - From a story by [Camilo José Cela](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Camilo_Jose_Cela) Better stay away from certain kinds of people. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/43 "2008-12-03T17:53:39Z")
If the dude didn’t like the way that puppy was eyeballing him, he’s REALLY not going to like prison. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/44 "2008-12-03T18:02:42Z")
> [@Projammer](#): > > Holy fuck-all. I’ve got a great dane and I’m pretty sure just his bones weigh more than 27 pounds. > > What plea do you usually put on the table? If it’s anything less than being assfucked with a barbwire wrapped baseball bat it’s too lenient. Yeah, the pictures in that one were really sad. I don’t know how he stayed upright. He did survive, however, and started gaining weight quickly once he was properly cared for. Offer: assuming they don’t have a prior record, a $1000 fine, 2 years probation, and court costs. All together, they’ll end up paying about $2800, and they’ll have to toe the line for two years, keep a curfew, abstain from alcohol, that sort of thing. Miss one payment or make one other mistake, and they can go to jail for up to a year. The max here for (first offense) cruelty to non-livestock animals is a $4000 fine and one year in jail. Yes, Texas law makes a distinction between livestock and non-livestock animals. Not that the penalties for cruelty are different, it’s just that it’s not a crime to kill your livestock animals in an acceptable manner or to perform other “animal husbandry” practices on them, such as branding or gelding. ---
**Author:** ![Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uosdwis_R.Dewoh)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/45 "2008-12-03T18:54:32Z")
Maybe the dog was evil. > [@](#): > > Gibson: You want me to replace the villain with a dog? I mean nobody > will know what’s going on. > Homer: They will if you set up that the dog is evil. All you do is > have to show him doing this. [lowers eyelids and glances > around in shifty-eyed fashion] > Then people will suspect the dog. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/46 "2008-12-03T20:04:46Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > If the dude didn’t like the way that puppy was eyeballing him, he’s REALLY not going to like prison. Prison has puppies now? That doesn’t sound so bad. ---
**Author:** ![Nikki\_Tikki\_Tavi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3da27b/32.png) [@Nikki\_Tikki\_Tavi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nikki_Tikki_Tavi)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/47 "2008-12-03T20:59:03Z")
> [@sailor](#): > > I have a HUGE penis [sub](relative to the size of my wallet)[/sub] Yeah but do you have buggy eyes? ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/48 "2008-12-03T21:00:36Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > Prison has puppies now? That doesn’t sound so bad. They must have been bad puppies. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/49 "2008-12-03T21:17:44Z")
[Freejack] You keep lookin’ at me like that, you’re gonna see me kill you. [/Freejack] ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/50 "2008-12-03T21:18:35Z")
The “I didn’t like the way it was looking at me” excuse sounds utterly bogus. The real reason, I’m sure, is that he wanted to hurt and control his girlfriend as much as possible so he destroyed something which she loved and which made him jealous. Just like the child-killing ex-boyfriends and ex-husbands we often read about in the news. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/51 "2008-12-03T22:19:56Z")
Looks like the dog had good reason to be eyeballin’ that dude. ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/52 "2008-12-03T22:39:47Z")
Listen, we’re jumping all over this guy and we don’t even know the whole story yet. Maybe the bitch had it coming. ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2008, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/53 "2008-12-03T23:06:24Z")
Goal! ---
**Author:** ![bobkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c67d28/32.png) [@bobkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobkitty)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2008, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/54 "2008-12-04T02:00:52Z")
[confession] I’ve kicked a dog down a flight of stairs before. I was renting the basement apartment in the house my employer and his wife owned; they went on vacation, and I was tasked with taking care of their animals while they were gone. One, a Yorkie, was the thing nightmares were made of. Yappy, bitey, literally shit and pissed on everything… I hated that damn dog. I was trying to get back down to my apartment (there was a flight of stairs from the main part of the house, blocked by a baby/dog gate), and the stupid dog was doing its best to protect me from my shoes. I used my best doggy dominatrix voice, tried nudging him to the side, tried stamping at him to get him to go away, tried throwing one of his toys into the other room for him to chase… nothing. I picked him up and tossed him a little bit to the side, just far enough to give me a chance to get through the dog gate, but he was faster than I thought. As I went through the gate he ran in front of me, latching onto the foot I was just about to put on the second stair. Instead of stepping on him or toppling headfirst down the stairs, I booted him. Luckily the stairs were carpeted and the dog was incredibly stupid… he bounced a couple times, landed at the bottom, and was back up the stairs with no apparent harm done. Well, other than the fact that he never tried to block me from going down the stairs again. [/confession] This guy appears to be a certifiable asshole, though. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2008, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/55 "2008-12-04T03:28:52Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > Yeah, he probably should have just shot the dog, then no one would be on his back. Mmm, in Illinois, anyway, shooting a dog is the same as beating it to death. A class 4 felony - Aggravated Cruelty. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2008, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/56 "2008-12-04T03:41:16Z")
> [@AngryIrishLass](#): > > Want one. > > Hope the guy gets the shit kicked out of him. My aunt and uncle have a Shih tzu. Her eyes look almost like a human’s. She’s a total sweetie. (Even if my aunt DID paper-train her) > [@neuroman](#): > > Listen, we’re jumping all over this guy and we don’t even know the whole story yet. Maybe the bitch had it coming. Well, it looks like he’s gonna be someone’s bitch pretty soon. ---
**Author:** ![Sapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Sapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapo)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2008, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/57 "2008-12-04T14:38:13Z")
I hope the OP meant to be funny. The gratuitous picture of a random puppy was either too funny or just ridiculous, depending on intention. > [@sailor](#): > > Better stay away from certain kinds of people. That story was pure gold. I have no idea what it had to do with this thread, but I don’t care. It was just too funny. ---
**Author:** ![Greywolf73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@Greywolf73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greywolf73)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2008, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/58 "2008-12-04T16:06:59Z")
Sort of related (the “I shot a man” western story reminded me)–I just finished reading a book of excerpts from pioneer women’s diaries from the late 1800s and in one woman’s journal, she talks about a family dog that became an aggravation because she got old and also barked at everything. The father told the daughter to “get rid of” the old dog and being “soft-hearted”, the author and her sister decided they couldn’t just shot the poor old dog since they loved her so much. So, instead they decided on another method. They took the dog to the edge of a cliff, tied her to a tree with a long rope and then kicked her off the edge. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2008, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/59 "2008-12-04T22:46:11Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > If the dude didn’t like the way that puppy was eyeballing him, he’s REALLY not going to like prison. There’s gotta be some sort of skull-fucking joke here waiting to be pulled out, but I’ll leave that to one of the resident pros around here. :dubious: 😉 :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2008, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385/60 "2008-12-04T23:50:28Z")
I’m just glad the cruel bastard got his collar felt. Guess the police had a good lead this time. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glorious-wonderful-ro-puppy-killed-for-eyeballing-owners-boyfriend/475385.md?page=4)