# Glurgiest songs **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 28, 2010, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068 "2010-03-28T00:48:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/1 "2010-03-28T00:48:25Z")
While I was reading the thread about the “[most Seventies-est song](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=557224)” it occurred to me that a lot of the the most obvious contenders are full of [glurge](http://www.wordspy.com/words/glurge.asp). Songs like “Billy, Don’t Be A Hero” and “Wildfire” are loaded with glurge. So, what are the glurgiest songs of all time? I’ll start off with: “Christmas Shoes” by NewSong. “We Love You, Call Collect” by Art Linkletter And even “Desiderata”, the Les Crane version. More recently, I’ll add “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)” by Baz Luhrmann and “Jesus, Take The Wheel” by Carrie Underwood. There’s more! Add them, without throwing up if you can. ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/2 "2010-03-28T00:51:01Z")
“Honey” by Bobby Goldsboro What do I win? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/3 "2010-03-28T00:53:16Z")
I don’t think there can be a glurgier song than Red Sovine’s _Teddy Bear_. > **[Answers - The Most Trusted Place for Answering Life's Questions](https://www.answers.com/redirectSearch?query=teddy-bear-red-sovine-song)** > > Answers is the place to go to get the answers you need and to ask the questions you want It must have been specifically engineered to evoke the maximum glurge response. ---
**Author:** ![statsman1982](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e79b87/32.png) [@statsman1982](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/statsman1982)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/4 "2010-03-28T01:16:51Z")
[Butterfly Kisses](http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Butterfly+kisses&search_type=&aq=f) ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/5 "2010-03-28T01:17:05Z")
[Christmas Shoes](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNsvE33pRSw) ---
**Author:** ![Celyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/6 "2010-03-28T03:32:01Z")
I nominate [Nobody’s Child](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LabjBeomcnI), words be [here](http://www.lyricsdownload.com/hank-snow-nobody-s-child-lyrics.html) , but really, you do not want to read them. O No! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![MadTheSwine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MadTheSwine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MadTheSwine)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/7 "2010-03-28T03:42:40Z")
> [@DeVena](#): > > “Honey” by Bobby Goldsboro > What do I win? 😉 You win nothing,your choice, out of the first 5 responses, is fifth. ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/8 "2010-03-28T03:49:39Z")
> [@statsman1982](#): > > [Butterfly Kisses](http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Butterfly+kisses&search_type=&aq=f) That’s exactly what I was going to post. I still consider it the worst song ever. ---
**Author:** ![yawuntz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a5b964/32.png) [@yawuntz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yawuntz)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/9 "2010-03-28T03:54:31Z")
Beyond any doubt, Sleazin’ in the Slums by Terry Jacks. Doesn’t he just? [![]( " - YouTube") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12QHhpr7dZY) ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/10 "2010-03-28T03:56:16Z")
I still vote for _Teddy Bear_. It has a crippled little boy, a dead father (who died trying to get home to his family), a mother who’s just scraping by, salt-of-the-earth truck drivers, CB radios, hopes fulfilled, and a thank-you. _sniff_☹ ---
**Author:** ![installLSC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/54ee81/32.png) [@installLSC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/installLSC)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/11 "2010-03-28T04:03:07Z")
[Moments](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQXtZ-kZWDI) by Emerson Drive. Everything bad about modern country music in one convenient package. And for a song that’s glurgely in a really creepy way, [Once You Understand](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2FpYDyetZhU) by a studio group named Think. Amazingly enough, it was a top 20 hit in 1972. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/12 "2010-03-28T04:40:13Z")
I guess I’ll go to hell if I nominate _One Tin Soldier_ by anyone who’s ever covered it. Yah, yah, yah, war is bad, peace is good. I still find this song super glurge-shlock. I kind of makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/13 "2010-03-28T04:52:40Z")
Michael Jackson’s _Man in the Mirror_. ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/14 "2010-03-28T04:55:00Z")
[The Little Girl](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvISU1xPazg) by John Michael Montgomery [God’s Will](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCRrrP0EhPc) by Martina McBride (actually, a number of songs by Martina McBride are honorable mentions for this one. Modern country has some issues. ---
**Author:** ![Tethered\_Kite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a5b964/32.png) [@Tethered\_Kite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tethered_Kite)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/15 "2010-03-28T04:58:34Z")
“In The Year 2525” by Zager and Evans is pretty glurgly, innit? ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/16 "2010-03-28T06:53:24Z")
_Wind Beneath My Wings_, especially as sung by Bette Midler. ---
**Author:** ![Azile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d07c76/32.png) [@Azile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azile)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/17 "2010-03-28T08:01:28Z")
“Don’t Take the Girl” by Tim McGraw. (And to make matters worse, it’s insanely catchy!) ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/18 "2010-03-28T08:14:43Z")
[![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8QN6p66AtDc/hqdefault.jpg "You're Having My Baby") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8QN6p66AtDc) Having my baby. Not quite as glurgy as Butterfly wings, but bad enough that I can’t hear either all the way through. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/19 "2010-03-28T08:16:29Z")
Spoilered in case you are diabetic. **Good Morning Starshine** Even the title is moronic, there is no starshine in the morning. First verse: [spoiler]Good morning starshine The earth says hello You twinkle above us We twinkle below Good morning starshine You lead us along My love and me as we sing Our early morning singing song[/spoiler] and if you want to taste a little vomit in your mouth, the chorus: Gliddy gloop gloopy Nibby nobby nooby La la la lo lo Sabba sibby sabba Nooby abba dabba Le le lo lo dooby ooby walla dooby abba dabba Early morning singing song ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2010, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/20 "2010-03-28T14:58:40Z")
don’t ask: wow, yes, that was oh so horrid… I had to actually think back to that chorus moment _shudders_ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068.md?page=2)