# Glurgiest songs **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 28, 2010, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068 "2010-03-28T00:48:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2010, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/61 "2010-03-29T17:38:44Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > I thought it was a railroad track. In “Teen Angel,” it was a railroad track: _It was late that night, the car was stalled Upon a railroad track– I pulled you out and we were safe, But you went running back._ Teenage death songs of the era were all particularly glurgy. Here are a couple more in the same vein: Ray Peterson’s “Tell Laura I Love Her” (1960) dealt with Tommy entering a stock car race to win the prize money so he could buy Laura a wedding ring. He crashes and dies, but that’s not the end of the song–Laura later hears his voice in the chapel where she prays for him. And “Last Kiss,” originally made popular by J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers in 1964, was another car crash song. This time, the girl is badly injured, but not so badly that she cannot ask her boyfriend to hold her for a little while. He does, and they kiss one last time. Now she’s gone to heaven and the narrator-singer’s “got to be good, so I can see my baby when I leave this world.” ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2010, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/62 "2010-03-29T17:39:02Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > I thought it was a railroad track. It was. \* 'Twas late that night, the car was stalled upon the railroad track, I pulled you out and we were safe, but you went running back.\* She could have just opened the door and stepped out herself, you’d think. Oh, well, Darwin is a cruel master. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2010, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/63 "2010-03-29T17:44:19Z")
Dave Barry suggests she was obese and got stuck between the seat and dashboard. ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2010, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/64 "2010-03-29T17:54:41Z")
“Timothy” by the Buoys is pretty glurgy. Guys trapped in a mine and have to resort to canabalism. Yep, standard teenage pop angst for the kids. (Thanks for nothing, Rupert Holmes) Some suggested later that Timothy was a mule… “Chestnut Mare” by the Byrds is incredibly awful. “I’m going to catch the horse if I can, And when I do I’ll give her my brand. And we’ll be friends for life, _she’ll be just like a wife_, I’m going to catch that horse if I can” _wretches into waste basket_ ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2010, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/65 "2010-03-29T18:19:11Z")
> [@campp](#): > > “Timothy” by the Buoys is pretty glurgy. Guys trapped in a mine and have to resort to canabalism. Come on. No way is ‘Timothy’ glurge. Now, I will accept The Gambler, since he refused to take it back, but Timothy I draw the line at. Way too dark to be glurge. ---
**Author:** ![Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superfluous_Parentheses)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2010, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/66 "2010-03-29T18:37:49Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > _Memory_ from CATS, but mostly because people insist on singing it like a funeral dirge. > > It’s supposed to be a reflective song. [This is the only version I can actually stand](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3WvUzZOCu8) - but only because it’s so cheesy. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2010, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/67 "2010-03-29T18:45:26Z")
“Papa Don’t Preach” by Madogga. ---
**Author:** ![Perciful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@Perciful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Perciful)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/68 "2010-03-30T13:48:09Z")
“Wildfire” by Michael Murphy. [A Sad Song About A Pony](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gl4Y4FWWkn0) ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/69 "2010-03-30T16:14:13Z")
This thread raises the interesting issue of what is glurge and what is genuinely moving. Ultimately, I guess, this is subjective… on the one hand, there are some people who will be repulsed by any song that attempts to be moving; on the other, the very existence of the kind of songs being mentioned in this thread indicates that there are many people who have no glurge-meter whatsoever. Here is a song that I find genuinely moving but that many people will certainly be glurged out by: “Christmas in the Trenches” by John McCutcheon. [http://www.folkmusic.com/record/r\_sols.htm#Christmas](http://www.folkmusic.com/record/r_sols.htm#Christmas) (On reflection, I think my glurge-meter has a different setting for folk music. A lot of folk songs are pretty glurgey, but somehow I don’t mind it as much.) ---
**Author:** ![Nars\_Glinley](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nars_glinley/32/8177_2.png) [@Nars\_Glinley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nars_Glinley)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/70 "2010-03-30T18:02:23Z")
> [@Perciful](#): > > “Wildfire” by Michael Murphy. > > [A Sad Song About A Pony](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gl4Y4FWWkn0) The world’s dumbest pony who managed to die when “there came a killin frost.” Apparently, Wildfire was a vegetable. ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/71 "2010-03-30T18:28:50Z")
> [@Nars\_Glinley](#): > > The world’s dumbest pony who managed to die when “there came a killin frost.” Apparently, Wildfire was a vegetable. It was the girl who supposedly died, not the pony. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/72 "2010-03-30T18:57:40Z")
So, really, on top of everything else, it’s incomprehensible. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/73 "2010-03-30T19:03:22Z")
_**[Watchin’ Scotty Grow](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G75cORqX_oQ)**_. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/74 "2010-03-30T19:06:44Z")
> [@acsenray](#): > > So, really, on top of everything else, it’s incomprehensible. Wildfire is not that tough to suss out, but you do need the lyrics in front of you. Woman loved riding a horse. Woman dies one winter. Horse freaks, and bolts. Guy plants stuff but a killing frost comes, and he knows his number’s up. He figures he and his woman are going to ride off all ghosty on Wildfire together. Yes, seriously. ---
**Author:** ![gone2thedogs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c67d28/32.png) [@gone2thedogs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gone2thedogs)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/75 "2010-03-30T21:11:26Z")
Yes, but the cover of Have’n my baby by the Circle Jerks is one of the best songs ever! Sorry couldn’t find a link, maybe someone else can? ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/76 "2010-03-30T21:30:50Z")
> [@bup](#): > > _**[Watchin’ Scotty Grow](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G75cORqX_oQ)**_. I prefer the Holy Modal Rounders’ anti-nuke version, “Watching Scotty Glow”. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2010, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/77 "2010-03-30T22:12:11Z")
> [@bup](#): > > _**[Watchin’ Scotty Grow](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G75cORqX_oQ)**_. Aww, I thought I was going to get to suggest that one! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2010, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/78 "2010-04-08T16:54:03Z")
> [@DeVena](#): > > “Honey” by Bobby Goldsboro Fool shoulda taken Honey to a shrink and got her Depression treated. ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2010, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/79 "2010-04-08T17:07:55Z")
I would like to mention Chuck Berry’s "[Memphis, Tennessee".](http://www.lyricsdepot.com/chuck-berry/memphis-tennessee.html) If you read it as intended, it’s glurgey. If you read it with a more cynical eye, it’s pretty sick. ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2010, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068/80 "2010-04-08T17:22:49Z")
I came in to post “Honey”. “Men in My Little Girl’s Life” wins the thread, though, I think. I like the reference to early 60s death songs. What a sick & twisted bunch those guys were, and must’ve caused tons of parental hand-wringing over this obsession with Death. Makes this generation look like Up With People. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/glurgiest-songs/534068.md?page=5)