# Go ahead, creatively insult me **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 21, 2002, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317 "2002-06-21T18:59:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/1 "2002-06-21T18:59:18Z")
I figure each person has a situation where they really want to insult someone, but for whatever reason, are unable to do so. So, I open myself up to your venom, sarcasm, and swipes. Since this is MPSIMS, keep it clean, but at least make it creative. I am your whipping boy. ---
**Author:** ![Daerlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Daerlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daerlyn)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/2 "2002-06-21T19:23:16Z")
Ooh . . . what a great idea. Wish I’d thought of it. Here’s one I’ve been saving for an aquaintance of my mothers’: “You have the attention span of a sparrow, so I suggest saving your minimal concentration powers for remembering to swallow so the water doesn’t run down your trachea instead.” ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/3 "2002-06-21T19:34:48Z")
“aroint thee, thou rump-fed runnion!” ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/4 "2002-06-21T20:28:48Z")
Oh, it’s you. I didn’t recognize you since you shaved your back. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/5 "2002-06-21T20:50:41Z")
My pee pee is bigger than your pee pee. ---
**Author:** ![sidle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee59a6/32.png) [@sidle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sidle)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/6 "2002-06-21T21:01:58Z")
Your father is a hamster, and your mother smells of elderberries. You’re also a pribbling beef-witted codpiece. So there. ---
**Author:** ![EnigmaOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@EnigmaOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EnigmaOne)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/7 "2002-06-21T23:12:38Z")
:::shrug::: You are a one-eyed goat felcher, possessed of the mental prowess of a door stop. …and your mother wears army boots. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2002, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/8 "2002-06-21T23:16:15Z")
I once broke up an anti-abortion rally by showing protesters a photo of you. * * * Jesus was in a coma. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/9 "2002-06-22T00:24:26Z")
May the fleas of a thousand camels invade your private parts. Nice meeting you, the pleasure was all yours. ---
**Author:** ![TelcontarStorm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3ab097/32.png) [@TelcontarStorm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TelcontarStorm)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/10 "2002-06-22T00:25:23Z")
You’re ugly and your Mother dresses you funny. ---
**Author:** ![runforrestrun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a3d4f5/32.png) [@runforrestrun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runforrestrun)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/11 "2002-06-22T00:37:17Z")
You’re a fungus without culture. I just made that one up. Your face is reminiscient of this odorous opossum I hit that looked like so much like the spawn of Satan that I backed up several times to make sure it was dead. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/12 "2002-06-22T01:06:28Z")
If you think that I would waste my 200th post on insulting the likes of you, then you are even more dim-witted than I had been told you were. If you were on fire and I had just finished off a Big Gulp in one minute, I wouldn’t waste my precious urine to put you out. Why, I wouldn’t cross the street to shoo flies off your rotting carcass. I’ve known slime molds with more personality than you. Thanks, **Mullinator**. I’ve been having a bad week and I needed to get that off my chest. ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/13 "2002-06-22T01:38:17Z")
You dumb and ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/14 "2002-06-22T01:43:38Z")
you apparently screw up my computer. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/15 "2002-06-22T02:05:05Z")
You’re such a loser, your Rice Crispies don’t even talk to you. ---
**Author:** ![WEW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@WEW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WEW)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/16 "2002-06-22T06:29:39Z")
I can’t think of one, but you guys are funny ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/17 "2002-06-22T06:50:58Z")
Mullinator, you ignorant slut. ---
**Author:** ![ageless6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@ageless6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ageless6)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/18 "2002-06-22T07:06:45Z")
You impotent masochist, you couldn’t get it up even if you understood Qadgop’s gibe or Eve bitch-slapped you for not having the guts to have a sex change. Just being on the same page as you nauseates me and every right thinking, normal citizen. Urp… ---
**Author:** ![DarkJudicator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@DarkJudicator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarkJudicator)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/19 "2002-06-22T13:02:38Z")
You pre-cerebral societal disorder, what’s a mistake like you even doing posting on a messageboard when you should be in electroconvulsive therapy? Did someone leave the gate unlocked again? ---
**Author:** ![MyFootsZZZ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/myfootszzz/32/12580_2.png) [@MyFootsZZZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MyFootsZZZ)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2002, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317/20 "2002-06-22T13:55:37Z")
This is the best thread ever! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-ahead-creatively-insult-me/115317.md?page=2)