# Go felch yourself, Regis Philbin **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 26, 2000, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516 "2000-06-26T01:55:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![tiggeril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggeril/32/7234_2.png) [@tiggeril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiggeril)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/21 "2000-06-27T02:10:14Z")
“themy” (Note to self: use the handy Preview button) Monster… who doesn’t like cookies? I could use a few… mmmmmmmmmmm. Cookies. Osiej (is that right?) Don’t some of the contestants just make you want to smack them? “Stop chatting with the monkey in the suit and pick your damn answer!! I don’t care if it’s your brush with fame, just get on with it!” Ugh. I wonder what my parents would say if I just got up and screamed that in the middle of dinner? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![osiej](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a5b964/32.png) [@osiej](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/osiej)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/22 "2000-06-27T02:37:14Z")
Tiggeril … Try it! Might make you a black sheep for a bit but… your point will be made, if not taken. I too was subjected to TV during dinner while I was growing up. Found out much later that the reason we didn’t talk at dinner was because the stuff going on was far too stessful and painful. TV was like a sedative. I’m certainly not suggesting that this is going on in your family, merely sharing my experience. The contestants are SO stupid!!! It’s really unbelievable!!! These folks walk around, depriving me of precious oxygen!! The questions are so EASY yet they flub them, and need a “life line” (wonder how often the line is wrong? Now that statistic would interest me!). The IQ level is negative! ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/23 "2000-06-27T02:46:52Z")
What’s even worse is when your parents worship the guy ::shudder:: God, it’s sickening that people would enjoy watching that trash! Oh, and tiggeril…do you have any more cookies? ---
**Author:** ![tiggeril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggeril/32/7234_2.png) [@tiggeril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiggeril)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/24 "2000-06-27T02:51:25Z")
> [@](#): > > Found out much later that the reason we didn’t talk at dinner was because the stuff going on was far too stressful and painful. TV was like a sedative. Yeah… actually that IS what’s going in in my family, but instead of keeping silent, my parents are starting to dump their neuroses on me… a little going-away present before college, I guess. ::starts to toss Monster a cookie… then sits down and shares the bag with him:: ---
**Author:** ![osiej](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a5b964/32.png) [@osiej](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/osiej)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/25 "2000-06-27T03:14:19Z")
Ouch. Tiggeril, I can relate. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. If it’s any consolation, give it a little time. As I finished college, my folks and I became friends. It really will get better, your leaving for school is just another “oh god, my life is flashing by me” wake up call for them. It’s not you. But I digress. Regis, you scum sucking, penguin felching chicken fucking … Do us all a favor and find a sniper in a clock tower! ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/26 "2000-06-27T03:14:33Z")
::munch munch:: Cookies are so much better when you have someone to share them with, and when you have someone you both want to be rid of. Here, tigger, I brought a cooler of assorted drinks…just in case you get thirsty. ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/27 "2000-06-27T14:20:38Z")
Thanks, Tiggeril. (blush) When I think back to the hotbed of conflict that was my childhood dinner table, I can definitely relate - I WISH that we had been allowed to self-medicate with comfort food AND mindless TV instead of just the former. But my parents insisted that we all “eat together as a family.” Translation: chew with your mouth closed, try not to drop anything, think twice before you ask someone to pass something because speaking aloud might invite the gentle rain of constructive criticism down on your head instead of on your brother’s. And why parents wonder why kids answer direct questions with “I don’t know,” “nothing,” and “fine, I guess.” I definitely feel for you - my family could at least have been counted on to openly mock Regis and his white-bread cohorts. It sounds like in your house might be “Shhhhhh…I can’t hear Regis when you stick your fingers in your ears and chant ‘what does not destroy me makes me stronger!!!’” How long until you go away for college? Ok, enough sharing. Regis, your mother felches circus clowns! ---
**Author:** ![tiggeril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggeril/32/7234_2.png) [@tiggeril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiggeril)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/28 "2000-06-27T23:11:08Z")
Monster: Whatcha got? > [@](#): > > “Shhhhhh…I can’t hear Regis when you stick your fingers in your ears and chant ‘what does not destroy me makes me stronger!!!’” That sounds oddly familiar… 😉 And orientation at U. of Chicago isnt’ until September 16!! That’s almost a full month after my friends starts. Ergh. Oh, well… longer summer break. I am spending it at my dad’s office, going over patient accounts and helping with billing, so it’s not a vacation at ALL! Damn you, Regis!! Now do you see what you’ve done!! That camel-squicking, chipmunk-felching bastard. ---
**Author:** ![Initial\_Entry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e9a140/32.png) [@Initial\_Entry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Initial_Entry)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/29 "2000-06-27T23:19:32Z")
So, uh… Is that your final answer? ::runs away:: ---
**Author:** ![\_android209](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/a9a28c/32.png) [@\_android209](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_android209)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/30 "2000-06-27T23:22:23Z")
UncleBeer has had enough and deleted the content of this post by an obvious impostor. I also turned of the e-mail notification to Coldfire. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/31 "2000-06-27T23:24:24Z")
Authenticating post. I did what you see above. ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/32 "2000-06-27T23:48:13Z")
Well, lets see…I’ve got milk, Yoohoo, a six pack of Sprite and Cactus Cooler, some plain water…and some stuff we could make margaritas with (but don’t let anyone else know that!) Now, what I would love to see happen on that damn show, the only time I would watch it, is if someone asks Regis “Now I’ve got a question for you…how big of an explosion would these 4 sticks of TNT make?? YOU HAVE NO LIFELINES! Mwa ha ha ha! Die numbnuts!!” That would be cool. ---
**Author:** ![BigJoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9bd4f/32.png) [@BigJoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigJoe)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/34 "2000-06-28T01:34:25Z")
Eh Gad! This fuck wit is still jabbering? Go soak in a cess pool, numb nuts - you’ll likely learn something. ---
**Author:** ![tiggeril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggeril/32/7234_2.png) [@tiggeril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiggeril)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/35 "2000-06-28T01:47:06Z")
[whispering]makemineamargarita[/whispering] I wonder what would happen in that situation… would Our Hero’s head simply collapse as he realized that the answer to this little question IS NOT provided by the producer? Or would he make some smarmy comment and get blown up? Either way, it would be much more entertaining than the actual show… IE: Don’t make me come over there… ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/36 "2000-06-28T07:01:24Z")
Here ya go, dear…a margarita for tigger. Can you imagine how horrible his pleas for mercy would sound as he tries to beg for his life would sound? And how sweet the same repulsive pleas would sound knowing he is going to be vaporized imminently? Man, I would pay a million dollars to see that shit happen. ---
**Author:** ![\_dpr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/b9e5f3/32.png) [@\_dpr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_dpr)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/37 "2000-06-28T07:29:44Z")
You should “felch” yourself and leave regis be. ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/38 "2000-06-28T07:51:31Z")
You can shut the fuck up and get a life. Inbred retards like you shouldn’t be let out of the institutes they belong in, let alone given access to a computer where they can post the stupid shit you do. Are you so without a life that you need to impersonate a member of this board, a member I respect very much? Go back to whence you came, but be sure someone flushes this time. ---
**Author:** ![tiggeril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggeril/32/7234_2.png) [@tiggeril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiggeril)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/39 "2000-06-28T13:57:21Z")
Is it me or are the trolls getting wimpier and wimpier? The ones before at least _tried_. Not that I miss them, or anything… ::kicks back and enjoys her icy margarita:: ---
**Author:** ![ponch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bcef8e/32.png) [@ponch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ponch)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/40 "2000-06-28T14:05:11Z")
Why don’t you try “family conversation” during “family dinner”. Regis is only on ABC. ---
**Author:** ![tiggeril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggeril/32/7234_2.png) [@tiggeril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiggeril)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516/41 "2000-06-28T17:37:02Z")
Ponch… you don’t know what it’s like in my family. EVERY “family conversation” ends in a knock-down, drag-out screaming match. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/go-felch-yourself-regis-philbin/23516.md?page=3)