# God hates the fag King James Bible **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 21, 2009, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215 "2009-08-21T16:55:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/21 "2009-08-21T18:21:54Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > **DrDeth** has a well-documented history of being entirely unable to recognize sarcasm. At one point, he was suggesting a ban on anyone who “whooshed” another poster. > > And no, I’m not kidding. Whoa, got a link? I gotta read that! ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/22 "2009-08-21T18:29:19Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > **DrDeth** has a well-documented history of being entirely unable to recognize sarcasm. At one point, he was suggesting a ban on anyone who “whooshed” another poster. > > And no, I’m not kidding. Ooooooh. Jesus Christ. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/23 "2009-08-21T18:29:59Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > Guess what, all of you anti-gay fanatics and Bible-thumping morons? Your Bible is a fag bible, created by a [fag king.](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/dc/James_I%2C_VI_by_John_de_Critz%2C_c.1606..png) (If that isn’t a fag king, I don’t know what is a fag king.) Yes, King James was a fag. He loved nothing more than to fuck his young, handsome male servants and courtiers. He fucked Robert Carr, who was his “gentleman of the bedchamber” (FAG!) but his greatest love was George Villiers, 1st Duke of Buttfuckingham, er, I mean Buckingham. He wrote letters to him containing passages like this one (seriously) : > > Sweet child and wife? Dear dad and husband? Looks like there was more than just a FAG relationship going on there, but also a leather-daddy thing too. Praise Jesus! God bless the King James Bible! > > There was even apparently a secret hidden passage that was recently discovered, linking the bedrooms of the King and his boy-toy, in the country-house in which the two of them lived together. It was widely known even in the fag king’s own day that he spent far more time with his male homosexual lovers than with his own wife. A contemporary poet, Théophile de Viau remarked: > > And yet…James "adopted a severe stance towards sodomy using English law. His book on kingship, Basilikón Dōron, (Greek for “Royal Gift”) lists sodomy among those “horrible crimes which ye are bound in conscience never to forgive”. He also singled out sodomy in a letter to Lord Burleigh giving directives that Judges were to interpret the law broadly and were not to issue any pardons, saying that “no more colour may be left to judges to work upon their wits in that point.” > > For God’s sake, he wasn’t just a fag, he was a closeted fag. > > You guys are going to have to come up with a new bible. Maybe the Fred Phelps Version? > > note - I obviously don’t have anything against gays…my use of the term “fag” here is just a takeoff of asshole Fred Phelps’s obsession with the word The word FAG appears ten times in this post. Just thought I would share. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/24 "2009-08-21T18:32:00Z")
In \*your \*post, it appeared eleven times. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tao_s_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/25 "2009-08-21T18:32:34Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Rum, sodomy, and the lash: pick two. I’ll take rum twice. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/26 "2009-08-21T18:44:01Z")
> [@Shirley\_Ujest](#): > > The word FAG appears ten times in this post. > Just thought I would share. No, you’re wrong - you missed the one in the _disclaimer_. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/27 "2009-08-21T18:45:24Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > King James didn’t write the King James Bible, you ignorant troll. > > Other than a better translation, with much better Shakespeare-like language, there’s not a lot of difference between it and the Bishops Bible. > > And, there’s not much difference, other than modern language, between the KJV and later translations. > You sound like a homophobe yourself. I think you protest too much. I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/28 "2009-08-21T18:51:39Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore. Certainly not: King James had never heard of Kansas, and wouldn’t have wanted to go there if he had. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/29 "2009-08-21T18:58:33Z")
This is a fag king too: [![](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Friedrich_Zweite_Alt.jpg) ](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Friedrich_Zweite_Alt.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/30 "2009-08-21T19:00:35Z")
> [@Johnny\_Angel](#): > > I’m no historian I would not be at all surprised to find that this was a common rumor spread about public figures. Anyway, it wouldn’t diminish the value of the translation James comissioned. God works in mysterious gays. I think that if it weren’t for homos throughout history with their increased free time due to not having a family to support, we wouldn’t have much religion at all honestly. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/31 "2009-08-21T19:26:51Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > No, you’re wrong - you missed the one in the _disclaimer_. Only on this board would someone count the number of times the word “fag” appeared in the OP, and another person would follow up to check his work and correct him. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/32 "2009-08-21T19:30:33Z")
We put the “anal” in “anal-retentive!” Wait, was that a gay joke? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/33 "2009-08-21T19:36:45Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > We put the “anal” in “anal-retentive!” > > Wait, was that a gay joke? No, it’s just going through a phase. ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/34 "2009-08-21T19:38:11Z")
_You know how I know you’re a fag? You read the King James Bible._ ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/35 "2009-08-21T19:43:18Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > Did he do anything more in that direction than his cousin and predecessor Queen Elizabeth? And (my possible ancestor) Guy Fawkes was not executed for being a Catholic: he was executed for trying to blow Parliament up. Yes, but he wasn’t trying to blow up Parliament for a lark. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/36 "2009-08-21T19:50:22Z")
Your post said “blow” twice. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/37 "2009-08-21T19:51:26Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Yes, but he wasn’t trying to blow up Parliament for a lark. No, he was holding out for a Benson & Hedges. Or at the very least a Marlboro. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/38 "2009-08-21T19:56:50Z")
Again with the fags. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/39 "2009-08-21T19:57:01Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Yes, but he wasn’t trying to blow up Parliament for a lark. No, he was part of a plot to overthrow the Protestant governments of England and Scotland. Does that make it any better? ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215/40 "2009-08-21T20:00:16Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > No, he was part of a plot to overthrow the Protestant governments of England and Scotland. Does that make it any better? Proverbially, it makes him the last man to enter Parliament with honest intentions. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-hates-the-fag-king-james-bible/507215.md?page=3)