# God help you, you fucking racist shitbag. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 1, 2014, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094 "2014-04-01T16:27:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/21 "2014-04-01T17:44:27Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > My wife just let me in on the joke. Happy April Fools’ Day to me. :o > But I’m not one to make idle threats so now I guess I have to kill her. Shame, really. Things have been going so well all this time. Wasn’t there once a movie about this? Where a misunderstood April Fool’s Day prank creates a chain reaction of events that ultimately results in the entire world reaching the brink of nuclear war? Or was that just a dream I once had? ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/22 "2014-04-01T17:47:45Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > The good news is, I have 364 days to plot my revenge. It would have been funnier if you actually beat some innocent person to death before finding out. I’m sure your face would have been red. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/23 "2014-04-01T17:49:30Z")
> [@lost4life](#): > > It would have been funnier if you actually beat some innocent person to death before finding out. I’m sure your face would have been red. IKR! ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/24 "2014-04-01T17:55:42Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > FUCKING HELL! I’ve been had! > > :smack: > > My wife just let me in on the joke. Happy April Fools’ Day to me. :o > But I’m not one to make idle threats so now I guess I have to kill her. Shame, really. Things have been going so well all this time. > ETA: ninja’d by **Esox Lucius** , et al. the day is still young. cling wrap the top of the toilet bowl. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/25 "2014-04-01T18:10:44Z")
Nevermind. ---
**Author:** ![Stuffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@Stuffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stuffy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/26 "2014-04-01T18:58:08Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#): > > Wasn’t there once a movie about this? Where a misunderstood April Fool’s Day prank creates a chain reaction of events that ultimately results in the entire world reaching the brink of nuclear war? > > Or was that just a dream I once had? If it exists, please post the title because that sounds AWESOME!!! ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/27 "2014-04-01T20:05:54Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > But I’m not one to make idle threats so now I guess I have to kill her. Shame, really. Things have been going so well all this time. Its perfectly legal as long as you keep yelling “April Fools!” the entire time you are doing it. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/28 "2014-04-01T20:08:35Z")
Lucky you! The Milwaukee Sawzall® is on sale at Lowe’s! ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/29 "2014-04-01T21:11:22Z")
> [@johnpost](#): > > the day is still young. > > cling wrap the top of the toilet bowl. Tonight, get naked, blindfold her, tie her to the bed, then leave - go see a movie, whatever… ---
**Author:** ![Ace309](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ace309/32/1050_2.png) [@Ace309](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ace309)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/30 "2014-04-01T22:16:35Z")
This is the funniest thread ever. ---
**Author:** ![Esox\_Lucius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Esox\_Lucius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esox_Lucius)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/31 "2014-04-01T23:14:50Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > FUCKING HELL! I’ve been had! > > :smack: > > My wife just let me in on the joke. Happy April Fools’ Day to me. :o > But I’m not one to make idle threats so now I guess I have to kill her. Shame, really. Things have been going so well all this time. > ETA: ninja’d by **Esox Lucius** , et al. If you change your mind and decide to spare her life, please give her a high five from all of us. Well played, Mrs. Silver! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/32 "2014-04-02T01:01:24Z")
> [@Icarus](#): > > Tonight, get naked, blindfold her, tie her to the bed, then leave - go see a movie, whatever… If she’s anything like my partner, she’ll disassemble the bed and leave. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/33 "2014-04-02T01:11:39Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#): > > Wasn’t there once a movie about this? Where a misunderstood April Fool’s Day prank creates a chain reaction of events that ultimately results in the entire world reaching the brink of nuclear war? > > Or was that just a dream I once had? I don’t know about that, but check this out: [http://myfox8.com/2014/04/01/april-fools-text-reports-shooting-at-sc-college-charges-follow/](http://myfox8.com/2014/04/01/april-fools-text-reports-shooting-at-sc-college-charges-follow/) > [@](#): > > According to an incident report, Angela Timmons, an employee at the school, sent a text message to her daughter about hearing shots fired in the school as an April Fool’s prank. > > When the daughter’s followup text didn’t get a response, she called 911 to report the shooting. > > Timmons is facing charges of disturbing school, aggravated breach of peace and two counts of unlawful use of telephone. Her daughter will not be charged for making the call, as she did not realize it was a prank. ---
**Author:** ![Isilder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/cc9497/32.png) [@Isilder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isilder)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/34 "2014-04-02T01:45:42Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > “Vote for the American” bumper sticker … you racist, brain dead, shit eating fucktard. :mad: Ironically words equivalent to those on the sticker are in the constitution. The president must be a natural born… “american”. Does Quicksilver also thinks the constitution is unacceptable … ? ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/35 "2014-04-02T01:57:44Z")
> [@Isilder](#): > > Ironically words equivalent to those on the sticker are in the constitution. > The president must be a natural born… “american”. > Does Quicksilver also thinks the constitution is unacceptable … ? Way to completely miss the point… ---
**Author:** ![Esox\_Lucius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Esox\_Lucius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esox_Lucius)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/36 "2014-04-02T02:01:22Z")
Thank God, a real American has finally showed up. How many blacks you beat up today, son? ---
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/37 "2014-04-02T02:23:55Z")
I came upon this late, in MPSIMS. Was _sure_ the mods were switching around forum titles. ---
**Author:** ![MacCat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maccat/32/216_2.png) [@MacCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacCat)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/38 "2014-04-02T02:31:00Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > I don’t know about that, but check this out: [http://myfox8.com/2014/04/01/april-fools-text-reports-shooting-at-sc-college-charges-follow/](http://myfox8.com/2014/04/01/april-fools-text-reports-shooting-at-sc-college-charges-follow/) From that article… > [@](#): > > A spokesperson for Virginia College said they were “very, very disappointed regarding the poor judgment displayed” by one of their employees. Needs to be be _one of their_ **ex, former, fired** _employees_. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/39 "2014-04-02T02:38:56Z")
Truly a prank (and over the top response) worthy of making the April Fools Hall of Fame. Well done Missus Silver. 😉 And Quick? > [@Miller](#): > > One, two, [three.](http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rX7wtNOkuHo) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mind\_Your\_Head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Mind\_Your\_Head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mind_Your_Head)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094/40 "2014-04-02T13:20:54Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#): > > Wasn’t there once a movie about this? Where a misunderstood April Fool’s Day prank creates a chain reaction of events that ultimately results in the entire world reaching the brink of nuclear war? > > Or was that just a dream I once had? Try not to eat too much cheese before bed…might help [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/god-help-you-you-fucking-racist-shitbag/685094.md?page=3)