# Goddammit holy shit a jalapeño burned my dick **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 17, 2010, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddammit-holy-shit-a-jalapeno-burned-my-dick/539716 "2010-05-17T02:34:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![John\_Stamos\_Left\_Ear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_stamos_left_ear/32/3198_2.png) [@John\_Stamos\_Left\_Ear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Stamos_Left_Ear)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddammit-holy-shit-a-jalapeno-burned-my-dick/539716/121 "2013-10-16T22:33:54Z")
One time the wife and I shared a nice spicy Mexican meal together. Later on, the mood struck for dessert and I’m not talking about flan here. I, being a gentleman and a cunning linguist, was serving up dessert to my wife first, when all of a sudden, the realization that spicy chilis were recently in my mouth became apparent to my poor, unsuspecting wife, who proceeded to flee to the lavatory where she spent the next 15 minutes flushing her most sensitive of areas while cursing me out for causing her distress. Rules are now in place to prevent this unfortunate incident from recurring. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddammit-holy-shit-a-jalapeno-burned-my-dick/539716/122 "2013-10-16T23:49:27Z")
> [@johnpost](#): > > get it all the way in and wiggle from side to side. And the fruit on the bottom really enjoys it that way, too. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2013, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddammit-holy-shit-a-jalapeno-burned-my-dick/539716/123 "2013-10-19T08:56:32Z")
Hands have been mentioned, but I’ll tell ya: Avoid blowjobs from anyone who has been eating peppers. Words to live by. EDIT: Ah, I see now this _has_ been touched on. Still words to live by. ---
**Author:** ![Ograbme](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Ograbme](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ograbme)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2013, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddammit-holy-shit-a-jalapeno-burned-my-dick/539716/124 "2013-10-19T17:03:52Z")
I, too, had a horrible jalepeno-hand-dick disaster. But urination wasn’t the trigger. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2013, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddammit-holy-shit-a-jalapeno-burned-my-dick/539716/125 "2013-10-19T18:12:27Z")
> [@John\_Stamos\_Left\_Ear](#): > > One time the wife and I shared a nice spicy Mexican meal together. Later on, the mood struck for dessert and I’m not talking about flan here. > > I, being a gentleman and a cunning linguist, was serving up dessert to my wife first, when all of a sudden, the realization that spicy chilis were recently in my mouth became apparent to my poor, unsuspecting wife, who proceeded to flee to the lavatory where she spent the next 15 minutes flushing her most sensitive of areas while cursing me out for causing her distress. > > Rules are now in place to prevent this unfortunate incident from recurring. See, libertarians ? \*This \*is why we have regulations. Because we learn from our catastrophic, boner-ending mistakes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddammit-holy-shit-a-jalapeno-burned-my-dick/539716.md?page=6)