# GOddamn phone fuckpot ASs! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 9, 2002, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472 "2002-10-09T02:46:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![glarGH](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/76d3ee/32.png) [@glarGH](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glarGH)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2002, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/21 "2002-10-09T20:41:22Z")
> [@](#): > > Peter Gibbons: I don’t like my job and I don’t think I’ll go anymore. > Joanna: You’re just not gonna go? > Peter Gibbons: Yeah. > Joanna: Won’t you get fired? > Peter Gibbons: I don’t know. But I really don’t like it and, uh, I’m not gonna go. > Joanna: So you’re gonna quit? > Peter Gibbons: Uh-uh. Not really. I’m just gonna stop going. > Joanna: When did you decide all that? > Peter Gibbons: About an hour ago. > Joanna: So you’re going to get another job? > Peter Gibbons: I don’t think I’ll like another job. > Joanna: Well what are you going to do about money? Bills? > Peter Gibbons: You know I never really liked paying bills, I don’t think I’m going to do that either. ---
**Author:** ![glarGH](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/76d3ee/32.png) [@glarGH](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glarGH)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2002, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/22 "2002-10-09T21:04:38Z")
**Abe Babe** , the Canadians are the only ones who keep asking… repeatedly. Its kind of creepy and Un-sexy. Anyone need a graphics toady? I’m at a point where I just don’t care anymore. ---
**Author:** ![apotheosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba8739/32.png) [@apotheosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apotheosis)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2002, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/23 "2002-10-09T21:17:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by glarGH \* > **Abe Babe, the Canadians are the only ones who keep asking… repeatedly. Its kind of creepy and Un-sexy.** Very disturbing to think the shallow fetishism of our northern neighbors is beginning to surpass ours. My fellow Americans, we are facing a shallow fetishism gap. Not suprisingly, I blame the terrorists. ---
**Author:** ![Zazie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Zazie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zazie)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2002, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/24 "2002-10-09T21:41:41Z")
I can’t stop laughing… this whole thread has just made my day! ---
**Author:** ![FordPrefect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e99b99/32.png) [@FordPrefect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordPrefect)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2002, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/25 "2002-10-09T21:46:02Z")
Well you have to understand that big boobs and a small portion of the face are the only things visible when wearing a snowsuit. ---
**Author:** ![glarGH](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/76d3ee/32.png) [@glarGH](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glarGH)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2002, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/26 "2002-10-09T23:39:10Z")
that must be why, then. It never really occured to me, seeing as we’re out in sunny Hawai’i. For the record, I am Asian, Female, early 20’s, tempermental and built like a 5’6" tank. ---
**Author:** ![Corrvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbce88/32.png) [@Corrvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corrvin)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/27 "2002-10-10T00:08:46Z")
Can you cultivate a lisp? Hiccups? Disgusting sinusoidal noises? Dry heaves? Can you sound about 60 and very grandmotherly? How about a young man with a very effeminate voice? I can’t figure out how to sound flat-chested, myself, but the above have certainly helped on the late-night pickup lines. 😉 Corr (who can say “The office is not open” in three languages now) ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/28 "2002-10-10T00:31:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Homebrew \* > \*\*You have to ask that on _this_ board? Office Space might be the most quoted movie on the board, with the possible exception of The Princess Bride. (Although I’m trying to increase the frequency of Cool Hand Luke references) \*\* “Well, I don’t care if it rains or freezes, Long as I have my plastic Jeezus Riding on the dashboard of my car” ---
**Author:** ![apotheosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba8739/32.png) [@apotheosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apotheosis)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/29 "2002-10-10T00:37:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by glarGH \* > \*\*For the record, I am Asian, Female, early 20’s, tempermental and built like a 5’6" tank. \*\* Hobbies? Interests? Oh, wait…you’re not _in_ the catalog… _sigh_ Well, between the thread title and ‘ass-poles’, you’ve quite an entertaining way with words. Perhaps a different career altogether would suit you? I don’t know one that would utilize that talent offhand, but I’m sure some of the local geniuses can come up with something. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/30 "2002-10-10T01:03:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by glarGH \* > \*\*For the record, I am Asian, Female, early 20’s, tempermental and built like a 5’6" tank. \*\* I don’t know about **apotheosis** ’s suggestion about a career change, but I foresee a long and fruitful _posting_ career here on the Dope. “Goddamn phone fuckpot ass.” I mean, that’s just fuckin’ _poetry_, man. ---
**Author:** ![glarGH](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/76d3ee/32.png) [@glarGH](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glarGH)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/31 "2002-10-10T02:38:37Z")
I think its something akin to late onset Tourette’s… I even have the nervous tics j/k. There are a lot of things that send me into an inarticulate rage, idiot callers included. I recall calling Verizon of Hawaii a “Commie suckbox” on another board. Don’t even get me started on them. I hope the entire telephone system crashes and burns. ---
**Author:** ![Skippman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Skippman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skippman)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/32 "2002-10-10T13:06:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FordPrefect \* > \*\*Well you have to understand that big boobs and a small portion of the face are the only things visible when wearing a snowsuit. \*\* Funniest thing I’ve read on the board in a long time. Please, please start a “Ask the Mail Order Bride Flunky” thread, 'cause boy do I have some questons. ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/33 "2002-10-10T13:17:57Z")
I have been sitting here laughing out loud since I clicked the link. I hurt myself and woke up my baby. It was worth it. **glarGH** – I wish you the best in finding employment that does not induce Tourette’s like suffering. That’s just no fun, even if it does make for classic and poetic thread titles. ---
**Author:** ![Abe\_Babe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ab097/32.png) [@Abe\_Babe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abe_Babe)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/34 "2002-10-10T13:39:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by apotheosis \* > \*\* > Very disturbing to think the shallow fetishism of our northern neighbors is beginning to surpass ours. > > My fellow Americans, we are facing a shallow fetishism gap. > > Not suprisingly, I blame the terrorists. \*\* This, like all other problems in the country today, is George W. Bush’s fault. Back when the Democrats were in the oval office, America was a leading exporter of fetishes. Our American fetishes were known the world around as shallower and stranger than any ‘local’ type. When our soldiers would liberate an oppressed people, they would distribute fetishes to swarms of giddy children. Now they pass out food. FOOD?!?! What good is a full stomach if you don’t have some hidden perverted desire to live for. We have to take back America. Al Gore’s new campaign slogan should be “Porn on every computer, and chaps in every dresser.” That is all. p.s. I’m trying to imagine which tank has the biggest boobs. p.p.s. Perhaps with the really creepy callers, you could let slip that this job is letting you save money for the operation to become a “real” woman. No offense to any transgendered folks, but that would put an immediate stop to any sexual interest for a large majority of males. Even the creepy ones, IMO ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/35 "2002-10-10T14:56:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by glarGH \* > \*\*I am the , uhhhh, sole and long suffering phone-anser-bot (among other things) for a mail order bride company. \*\* You have a pickup window? I could eat a little Chinese takeout…😛 ---
**Author:** ![FordPrefect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e99b99/32.png) [@FordPrefect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordPrefect)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/36 "2002-10-10T16:47:54Z")
I could eat a little Chinese takeout mail order bride myself… 😃 But don’t tell Mrs. FordPrefect ---
**Author:** ![FordPrefect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e99b99/32.png) [@FordPrefect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordPrefect)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/37 "2002-10-10T16:49:31Z")
crud, I meant eat out, I am not a cannibal… Really, I am not ---
**Author:** ![glarGH](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/76d3ee/32.png) [@glarGH](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glarGH)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/38 "2002-10-10T19:45:38Z")
:: resists the urge to make “fava beans and nice chianti” comments:: **Abe Babe** , you’d be surprised. I got a letter from some guy requesting shemales and hermaphrodites, “because they’re special and ladies, too.” I have an archive of weird letters from the offbeat to the “HOW THE HELL ARE YOU WRITING THIS?? I DIDN’T THINK THEY LET YOU HAVE POINTY OBJECTS IN THE 'SPECIAL HOSPITAL”. ---
**Author:** ![CRorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CRorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CRorex)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/39 "2002-10-10T21:20:49Z")
glarGH well since you won’t return the messages I keep leaving… How exactly does one go about returning a defective product? Yes see we were [text edited due to extremely graphic content]. Then her pelvis just kinda gave way under the pressure… While I understand I can’t get a full refund, I’d think that I should get a partial refund, or maybe for a small surcharge a replacement. * * * No mods or editing commands were used during the creation of this post. ---
**Author:** ![glarGH](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/76d3ee/32.png) [@glarGH](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glarGH)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472/40 "2002-10-10T22:01:38Z")
i think you’d have to talk to the INS on that one. Or maybe accounting. I just handle the phones and the photos. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamn-phone-fuckpot-ass/131472.md?page=3)