# Goddamnit, UncleBeer!!!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [February 14, 2003, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088 "2003-02-14T16:45:11Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/1 "2003-02-14T16:45:11Z")
You almost gave me a heart attack. I saw [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=162955) and thought I was being pitted. My whole life flashed in front of my eyes, while I scanned it for things that I might be about to get yelled at for.
Meanie.
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### Author:  [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/2 "2003-02-14T16:53:41Z")
And, he never gives us beer. Father Christmas brings us pressies, Father Time brings us time, Mother Nature gives us the goodness all around, and Uncle Beer? Squat.
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/3 "2003-02-14T16:54:54Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by OpalCat \*
> **My whole life flashed in front of my eyes, while I scanned it for things that I might be about to get yelled at for.**
Well, that probably took a while, then…
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### Author:  [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/4 "2003-02-14T16:56:52Z")
Not to be a jerk, but couldn’t you have just posted this in the other thread. Think of the hamsters.
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### Author:  [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/5 "2003-02-14T17:00:07Z")
Ethilrist: You realize, of course, that I now have to kick your ass…
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### Author:  [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/6 "2003-02-14T17:02:31Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by GingerOfTheNorth \*
> \*\*And, he never gives us beer. Father Christmas brings us pressies, Father Time brings us time, Mother Nature gives us the goodness all around, and Uncle Beer? Squat. \*\*
Witty retorts?
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### Author:  [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/7 "2003-02-14T17:07:42Z")
Beer is better. You can catch slugs with beer. You can rinse your hair in beer. Some people even drink it.
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### Author:  [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/8 "2003-02-14T17:20:03Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by GingerOfTheNorth \*
> \*\*Beer is better. You can catch slugs with beer. You can rinse your hair in beer. Some people even drink it. \*\*
Shrimp boiled in beer is great. Also, there is a beer batter used for frying fish and it is great, too. I never heard of people drinking the stuff, though.
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### Author:  [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/9 "2003-02-14T17:23:17Z")
It’s the **Uncle** thing that bothers me. Seems quite presumptious. He ain’t my uncle. I’m guessing that I’m not in his will.
**Mister** Beer or **Herr** Beer seems more apropriate.
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### Author:  [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/10 "2003-02-14T17:23:40Z")
You people are just evil and wrong. Beer is not for hair, slugs, shrimp or fish, it is for 2trew!
I’m glad you aren’t being pitted, **OpalCat**. Aside from your bizarre attitude towards otter sniffing, you seem like a pretty nice person.
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### Author:  [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/11 "2003-02-14T17:25:36Z")
Re: drinking beer… I’ve heard some people drink it _straight from the goat_ :eek:
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### Author:  [@UnwrittenNocturne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UnwrittenNocturne)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/12 "2003-02-14T17:27:30Z")
Beer comes from goats? So why have I been spending all this time raising llama?
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### Author:  [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/13 "2003-02-14T17:28:38Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by beagledave \*
> \*\*It’s the **Uncle** thing that bothers me. \*\*
I don’t call him “Uncle.” Some things are just wrong.
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### Author:  [@Spooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spooky)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/14 "2003-02-14T17:32:07Z")
This calls for a beer…
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/15 "2003-02-14T17:33:04Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by GingerOfTheNorth \*
> \*\*Beer is better. You can catch slugs with beer. You can rinse your hair in beer. Some people even drink it. \*\*
Well, for god’s sake, don’t do it in that order!
[sub]_Again_ with the straight lines![/sub]
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### Author:  [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/16 "2003-02-14T17:41:44Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by porcupine \*
> \*\*I don’t call him “Uncle.” Some things are just wrong. \*\*
Yeah, but _who’s_ yer daddy? 😃
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### Author:  [@carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrot)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/17 "2003-02-14T17:43:44Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Coldfire \*
> **Yeah, but _who’s_ yer daddy?**
Jim Beam?
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### Author:  [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/18 "2003-02-14T17:47:33Z")
Toby Keith?
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### Author:  [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/19 "2003-02-14T17:52:20Z")
1. People who fear being Pitted may have grounds to rethink why they think they might be.
2. When come back, bring 3.14159265…
3. Hi, **Uncle Beer**!
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### Author:  [@UnwrittenNocturne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UnwrittenNocturne)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2003, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goddamnit-unclebeer/155088/20 "2003-02-14T17:54:18Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Polycarp \*
> \*\*
>
> 1. When come back, bring 3.14159265…
>
> \*\*
😃
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