# God's love of US Marines not returned **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 15, 2006, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532 "2006-11-15T15:44:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/1 "2006-11-15T15:44:09Z")
[Link](http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/11/14/toy.jesus.ap/index.html) > [@](#): > > “I believe as a churchgoing person, anyone can benefit from hearing the words of the Bible.” Well, ya. Just like anyone could benefit from the words of The Qr’an, the Tao de Cheng. or Mein Kampf…unless, you know, they don’t believe in the pretext of the literature. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/2 "2006-11-15T15:50:48Z")
Coulda had more fun with the story if you’d mentioned more detail in the OP. It’s a Talking Jesus Doll! Wonder if it comes with Kung Fu Grip? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/3 "2006-11-15T15:57:23Z")
[QUOTE=Oakminster] Coulda had more fun with the story if you’d mentioned more detail in the OP. It’s a Talking Jesus Doll! Wonder if it comes with Kung Fu Grip? [/QUOTE] Actually, it’s a Doubling Loaves of Bread and Fish Grip. ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/4 "2006-11-15T16:16:14Z")
[QUOTE=Really Not All That Bright] Actually, it’s a Doubling Loaves of Bread and Fish Grip. [/QUOTE] And you wouldn’t believe what happens if you dip it in water. ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/5 "2006-11-15T21:48:22Z")
If I had gotten this for xmas when I was a child, I’d have been very disappointed. A proselytizer disguised as an action figure…wheee. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/6 "2006-11-15T22:07:15Z")
[QUOTE=Michael La Roe] “The idea was for them to be three-dimensional teaching tools for kids,” La Roe said. “I believe as a churchgoing person, anyone can benefit from hearing the words of the Bible.” [/QUOTE] I wonder how the average American family would respond to an action-figure Mahomet reciting verses from the Koran, or an action-figure Krishna reciting verses from the Bhagavad Gita. (Of course, the average Muslim would be outraged by the former, but that’s beside the point). ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/7 "2006-11-15T22:10:50Z")
[QUOTE=Lissa] And you wouldn’t believe what happens if you dip it in water. [/QUOTE] You _can’t_ dip it in water. It keeps trying to walk on the surface, and just kinda skates away. ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/8 "2006-11-15T22:16:13Z")
[QUOTE=Oakminster] Coulda had more fun with the story if you’d mentioned more detail in the OP. It’s a Talking Jesus Doll! Wonder if it comes with Kung Fu Grip? [/QUOTE] And the holes are whistles! Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/9 "2006-11-15T22:21:34Z")
[QUOTE=bluethree] If I had gotten this for xmas when I was a child, I’d have been very disappointed. A proselytizer disguised as an action figure…wheee. [/QUOTE] Several years ago, I bought my eldest son a Wolverine and a Sabertooth action figures that were designed to shout insults back and forth at each other at regular intervals. Should a ‘Proselytizing Jesus Doll’ ever find its way into our house, I swear I’ll fish it out of his toy box, replace the batteries, and entertain the cats and Sundry with the Red-Neck Jesus held at blade point and harangued all day with “What You Lookin’ At, Bub..!?!” 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/10 "2006-11-15T22:23:20Z")
[QUOTE=Oakminster] Coulda had more fun with the story if you’d mentioned more detail in the OP. It’s a Talking Jesus Doll! Wonder if it comes with Kung Fu Grip? [/QUOTE] And the holes are whistles! Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/11 "2006-11-15T22:33:18Z")
You could have some fun hacking those things. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2006, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/12 "2006-11-15T23:44:02Z")
[QUOTE=Giles] I wonder how the average American family would respond to an action-figure Mahomet reciting verses from the Koran, or an action-figure Krishna reciting verses from the Bhagavad Gita. [/QUOTE] If you could get Krishna to qote from the _Kamasutram_, I bet we’d find a market for it. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/13 "2006-11-16T00:02:47Z")
[QUOTE=tomndebb] If you could get Krishna to qote from the _Kamasutram_, I bet we’d find a market for it. [/QUOTE] Yeah, the Jesus one just keeps saying “Missionary position”. ---
**Author:** ![Br\_er\_Lapin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Br\_er\_Lapin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Br_er_Lapin)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/14 "2006-11-16T00:10:22Z")
[QUOTE=bluethree] If I had gotten this for xmas when I was a child, I’d have been very disappointed. A proselytizer disguised as an action figure…wheee. [/QUOTE] When I was 5 or so, my dad’s girlfriend’s parents gave me this weird cardboard set of all the figures involved in the birth of christ, moses, noah, and other assorted biblical figures in a board-game type box. 😕 Wins the prize for “worst christmas present I’ve ever received.” Generally gave me the creeps. ---
**Author:** ![Fritz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c57346/32.png) [@Fritz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fritz)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/15 "2006-11-16T00:37:26Z")
[QUOTE=yanceylebeef] And the holes are whistles! Sorry. [/QUOTE] I hurt myself laughing at this… [sub]I am _so_ going to hell.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/16 "2006-11-16T17:03:04Z")
[QUOTE=yanceylebeef] And the holes are whistles! Sorry. [/QUOTE] Hey Jesus! Eclipse! It takes a stranger turn though - [Toys for Tots are now saying they will take the talking Jesus dolls and find “appropriate places” for them.](http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/10333960/detail.html) ---
**Author:** ![Lambo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lambo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lambo)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/17 "2006-11-16T17:47:13Z")
[QUOTE=muldoonthief] It takes a stranger turn though - [Toys for Tots are now saying they will take the talking Jesus dolls and find “appropriate places” for them.](http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/10333960/detail.html) [/QUOTE] Is it me, or does the Jesus doll in that link look like Val Kilmer with a beard? ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/18 "2006-11-16T18:09:51Z")
To me, the close-set eyes and sculpted beard say Luke Wilson. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/19 "2006-11-16T18:16:11Z")
what happens if the neighbor kid from toy story gets his hands on one? ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2006, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532/20 "2006-11-16T18:58:09Z")
[QUOTE=muldoonthief] Hey Jesus! Eclipse! It takes a stranger turn though - [Toys for Tots are now saying they will take the talking Jesus dolls and find “appropriate places” for them.](http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/10333960/detail.html) [/QUOTE] So what they’re saying is, they’ll find someplace to stick them? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gods-love-of-us-marines-not-returned/380532.md?page=2)