# Going Bald (Females Please Help) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 27, 2002, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294 "2002-03-27T02:02:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Venoma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@Venoma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Venoma)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/21 "2002-03-27T11:52:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tansu \* > Maybe you are, too - even with the receding hairline I doubt it - ignorance is never attractive. Oh, hold on, I’m only 140lbs, guess I’m not qualified to answer 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/22 "2002-03-27T11:57:39Z")
Us bald guys are not an attractive lot. Save the hair, before you suffer our fate! ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/23 "2002-03-27T13:43:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by spooje \* > \*\*Us bald guys are not an attractive lot. > \*\* You are TOO! Are too. Are too. mmm…bald guys… ---
**Author:** ![cerebrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3da27b/32.png) [@cerebrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cerebrum)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/24 "2002-03-27T13:55:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jessica2 \* > \*\*Perhaps you could shave the hair off your ass, and glue it to your head. Was that supposed to be hyphenated? I’m just not sure. > > You positive you don’t live under a bridge? Was that supposed to be hyphenated? \*\* hahahahahahah! funniest thing I read whole day. Was THAT supposed to be hyphenated? ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/25 "2002-03-27T13:58:03Z")
Repeat, comb overs are a bad thing. ---
**Author:** ![Embra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@Embra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Embra)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/26 "2002-03-27T18:17:47Z")
I’m a girl. I’m 200 pounds. I’m ferocious! I assumed the OP was trying to break in gently with a little all round deprecation before he started on the self-deprecation. Anyway, Icculus, a nice short cut would probably be your best bet. To a total stranger I expect the hairstyle already suits you, you just have to get used to it yourself. And learn to love your pate - it’s probably enjoying the air! Just remember the Factor 20 in the sun… Oh yeah, no comb-overs. [Bobby Charlton](http://www.worldcuparchive.com/LEGENDS/charlton.html) may be one of the most revered football players in England, but a tonsorial guru he was not. Embra ---
**Author:** ![Kayeby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de0a6/32.png) [@Kayeby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kayeby)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/27 "2002-03-27T19:01:03Z")
I’m actually quite curious as to where some guys get the idea that combovers are a good thing. Is there a men’s magazine that recommends it, or do fathers pass the knowledge down to their sons? Because I’ve never met a person who thought a combover was attractive. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/28 "2002-03-27T19:09:31Z")
Some guy I saw the other day had the worst combover I’ve ever seen. I just wanted to go over and rip it off his head and utter “You’re welcome!!!” ---
**Author:** ![Squid\_Vicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Squid\_Vicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squid_Vicious)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/29 "2002-03-27T19:16:56Z")
I’m a bald guy. I started shaving my head about 5 years ago when it became obvious that I could no longer part my hair in the middle or wear a flat top. I didn’t do it to be cool. I didn’t do it to hide anything. I did it because my honey wanted me too. She said I would look better; and, I think, she was right. After all, no one will fault a guy who can’t grow a decent beard for shaving his face. However, that’s not to say that shaving your head is for everyone. I happen to be blessed with a reasonably well shaped head and smallish ears. My advice is to try it and see. If you don’t like it, you can always grow whatever you have back out. I would wait to shave it until its sunny out so that you can get some color to your skin (unless you are already dark), and use some lotion after each shave to help toughen up the skin. [http://www.headblade.com](http://www.headblade.com) has some really cool razors designed for shaving heads. That’s all I have to say about that. ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/30 "2002-03-27T19:31:23Z")
I was going to post something supportive, titilating and all that, but I think you are an asshole, and I am glad you are going bald, and even if I weighed a million pounds and I drooled and I had one eye - I still wouldnt go out with a shit like you. > [@](#): > > Perhaps you could shave the hair off your ass, and glue it to your head. Was that supposed to be hyphenated? I’m just not sure. > > You positive you don’t live under a bridge? Was that supposed to be hyphenated? OMFG that was good - that should be framed or something ---
**Author:** ![Winnowill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/4491bb/32.png) [@Winnowill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winnowill)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/31 "2002-03-27T19:35:39Z")
I have a coworker who is bald on top, with the “ring” of hair around his ears and the lower back of his head. The hair is well-kept, nicely shaped, and gorgeous. He’s one of the most handsome people I know. And speaking as a female in the nearly 200-pound range, I am permitted to respond. (BTW - 200 pounds does not necessarily mean “fat” - tall women weigh more, after all. 😉 ) ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/32 "2002-03-27T19:42:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Winnowill \* > I have a coworker who is bald on top, with the “ring” of hair around his ears and the lower back of his head. The hair is well-kept, nicely shaped, and gorgeous. He’s one of the most handsome people I know. _cough_ 😉 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Venoma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@Venoma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Venoma)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/33 "2002-03-27T19:47:36Z")
You forgot the ‘hideous’ part, Winnowill. All of the men on my dad’s side of the family have receding hairlines. They are all sexy bitches, as well. (I might also mention that a beautiful rubinesque friend of mine is one of few women who have made me question, and tempted me to explore, my own sexuality. purr. she’s sexay.) ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/34 "2002-03-27T20:01:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jessica2 \* > \*\*Perhaps you could shave the hair off your ass, and glue it to your head. Was that supposed to be hyphenated? I’m just not sure. > > You positive you don’t live under a bridge? Was that supposed to be hyphenated? \*\* Oh, man! I’m laughing my ass off here, too. Too funny! I’m gonna be sitting at the Passover table tonight giggling to myself like a fool over that one. Was that supposed to be hyphenated? I’d like to say that I have often wondered the same thing as **Kayeby** : > [@](#): > > I’m actually quite curious as to where some guys get the idea that combovers are a good thing. Is there a men’s magazine that recommends it, or do fathers pass the knowledge down to their sons? Because I’ve never met a person who thought a combover was attractive. Perhaps the OP could, er, redeem himself a bit if he could answer the question: Why would you ever think a combover was a good idea? ---
**Author:** ![sidle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee59a6/32.png) [@sidle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sidle)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/35 "2002-03-27T20:02:38Z")
Well, it really depends on your overall level of attractiveness. However, since you are on a message board, I can assume that you are a 98-pound, iddle-biddy dicked loser. Therefore, it would seem that fugly is still fugly with or without the thatch. Logic is great, no? ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/36 "2002-03-27T20:18:03Z")
/em gets out notepad Sidle is my new FAVE poster. Find a way to use fugly in conversation. Pick up milk. ---
**Author:** ![Winnowill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/4491bb/32.png) [@Winnowill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winnowill)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/37 "2002-03-27T22:14:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mauvaise \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > Originally posted by Winnowill > > I have a coworker who is bald on top, with the “ring” of hair around his ears and the lower back of his head. The hair is well-kept, nicely shaped, and gorgeous. He’s one of the most handsome people I know. > > _cough_ > > 😉 😃 \*\* Not THE most handsome. Just one of them. I knew you’d be the one to catch that! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/38 "2002-03-27T22:44:11Z")
> [@](#): > > I was going to post something supportive, titilating and all that, but I think you are an asshole, and I am glad you are going bald, and even if I weighed a million pounds and I drooled and I had one eye - I still wouldnt go out with a shit like you. Hey- that describes me to the letter! I’ll go out with him! Pick me! Pick me! What a bizzare OP. I think he should dump iron filings on his balding skull, cover it in saran wrap (good and tight now!) and let his dates play “Wooly Willy” on his head. Zette ---
**Author:** ![Efrem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@Efrem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Efrem)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2002, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/39 "2002-03-27T23:14:38Z")
To all the people who wrote hateful messages to **Read Icculus** : Do you have a funny bone? I mean the only thing remotely insulting he said in all of his posts was: > [@](#): > > “I am seeking the advice of the female Dopers. All of you 200 lb. hideous, lonely, ERRRR, I mean lovely women who frequent this board.” in case you didn’t get it. IT WAS A JOKE!! After this small friendly joke about women on this board a few had thrown unwarrented mean and spiteful insults back at him, after this he compeltly apollogised for his friendly joke: > [@](#): > > “Please Green. I’m new, but I’ve lurked long enough to know what a troll is. I am honestly not trolling. Who would troll in the pit? Sorry about the weight thing. Now that you’ve expressed your disapproval about the weight comment, could you help me with the hair thing?” Insults still kept coming from some people. **Read Icculus** don’t worry about all the hateful insults, they’re just playing the game “bombard the newbe with hateful messages until he never comes back to the board”, next time don’t post in the pit with a joke that could aillinate 50% of people on this board. BTW with the hair thing, enjoy it now, maybe take some pictures to remember it by, then shave it when it’s as good as gone. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2002, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294/40 "2002-03-28T03:27:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Read Icculus \* > \*\* All of you 200 lb. hideous, lonely, ERRRR, I mean lovely women who frequent this board. \*\* Hmmm… my thinkin’ is you’ve got problems that are WAY bigger than how much hair you have. And Efrem… I didn’t see any wit anywhere, and I didn’t see anything that looked like an apology. It was a funny-free, completely bizarre and extremely insulting thing for this guy to spew, and he hasn’t improved on it since the OP. I would be fascinated to learn what the joke was, exactly. “You putrid, pathetic pigs, ooops, I mean pretty women, help me!” Is that a joke? “Hey, you shitty asshole licker, oh, I mean cool chicks, give me a hand.” Was that a joke? how about: “Would you revolting cunts, uh, nice ladies,assist me with a problem I have?” ? Am I getting the hang of this bizarro humor? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-bald-females-please-help/100294.md?page=3)