# Going on a first date with a cute girl i met online. any advice? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 26, 2015, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238 "2015-08-26T22:24:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/21 "2015-08-27T01:28:55Z")
Okay, I’m going to try here. If not for the OP then for other people who may be seeking dating advice in this thread. Don’t expect her to invite you over to her place on a first date so you can hang out at her house. Make a minimum effort. Think of some place interesting to take her to. Buy her a meal. Don’t expect sex on a first date. Your strategy here is to be somebody that she would want to have sex with. Give her some time to check you out and make up her mind. My advice to most people would be to be yourself. I’m not sure if that’s the best plan for the OP though. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/22 "2015-08-27T01:50:13Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Okay, I’m going to try here. You poor, misguided bastard. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/23 "2015-08-27T01:55:15Z")
Compare her to your ex, and list all the flaws she has that your ex doesn’t. That is usually a good conversation topic for a first date. Also ask for money. If she gives it to you, you have set a precedent and you can leech off her for the duration of the relationship. If she says no, then you can complain on facebook incessantly about her stinginess. Either way, you win. Also make a lot of vague references to an aloof uncle who is going to give you several million dollars, but only if you get married and have children before December 31st 2016. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/24 "2015-08-27T02:02:25Z")
I understand that the ladies like enormous dicks. Keep working the conversation around to your dick, in order to intrigue her. “Do you think it will rain later?” “I always know about rain in advance, because my enormous dick begins to throb uncontrollably.” ---
**Author:** ![April\_R](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/25 "2015-08-27T02:11:36Z")
Poor girl ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/26 "2015-08-27T02:19:40Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > I understand that the ladies like enormous dicks. Keep working the conversation around to your dick, in order to intrigue her. > > “Do you think it will rain later?” > “I always know about rain in advance, because my enormous dick begins to throb uncontrollably.” True\*, but what women really love is when you brag but you brag really hard over something that isn’t really impressive. For example, keep harping on about your 11 year old honda civic and what a nice job you do of taking care of it, or about your job as assistant manager at applebees. Women love that stuff, because anyone can brag about a luxury car or a 6 figure income. However if you are bragging and flexing about mediocre accomplishments that shows a high degree of alpha male status. \*Partially true. Women do love big dicks, but they also love AKs and 187 skills. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/27 "2015-08-27T02:25:25Z")
Remember, talk to her respectfully. Don’t use slurs when talking about women. Bitches hate that. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/28 "2015-08-27T02:26:17Z")
> [@justjake](#): > > i have. i just wanna have sex. Well, good luck. Just be yourself. Asking to be invited to her pool may be the bold move you need. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/29 "2015-08-27T02:36:33Z")
You ask us not to troll based on your past threads. But your past threads here do give us some clear clues about the kind of advice you are needing. Your threads have had a common theme: You ask why it’s important to act in ways that are good for other people, even if not good for yourself. You asked why stealing is wrong, for example. Here’s a real “there will be a quiz on [del]Friday[/del] Wednesday” case. We shall see if you’ve learned anything from your threads here. Your very focused interest in getting laid _tonight_ appears to be an example of you being focused only on your own needs with little regard for the needs or desires of those around you, and there is a very high chance that you will fail in even getting that. And even if you succeed in getting laid tonight, there is only a limited chance that you will come out of it with an on-going relationship that gets you laid three times a week for the next year or more. There is _some_ possibility that you could get laid tonight, although it’s probably very very low. But ask yourself this: Would you like a one-night stand that gets you laid _just_ once? Or would you like a real relationship that lasts for weeks or months or more, and gets you laid several times _every week_ for the duration of that relationship? Which seems more valuable to you? _Anything you say or do_ that _might_ help you get laid _tonight_ might also _not_ work, with the result that you don’t get laid at all, now or later. If you succeed in that and do get laid tonight, you _might or might not_ find yourself in a longer-term relationship that gets you laid two or three times a week for many weeks. OTOH, anything you say or do that _might_ help you get into a longer-term relationship, will probably not get you laid tonight. If you want to try this strategy, you forfeit getting laid tonight in favor of the _possibility_ of a longer-term relation. So you need to consider your goal, and then consider a strategy for achieving that goal: Is it more valuable to you to get laid just once tonight, or more valuable to get into a longer relationship that gets you laid a whole lot of times but not starting tonight? You can’t choose both – any strategy that has a reasonable chance of succeeding at one of those goals has a strong chance of failing at the other goal. (This is only a “good guess” of course. It’s possible to get a long-term relation that begins with getting laid tonight, but extremely unlikely.) And even the best strategy for either goal comes with _no guarantee_ so you might wind up the evening at home alone anyway. There are no guarantees. I’m pretty sure that it will be too late by the time you read this, but regardless of what does or doesn’t happen, perhaps it will help you in the future. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/30 "2015-08-27T02:40:17Z")
Did you meet her on Tinder or OKCupid? Or somewhere else? If you met her on Tinder then bangin’ on the first date is quite a possibility. If somewhere else, well, get over yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Inna\_Minnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Inna\_Minnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inna_Minnit)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/31 "2015-08-27T02:41:44Z")
Just make sure to pay attention to what the fat pig orders at dinner this time. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/32 "2015-08-27T02:48:04Z")
> [@Ravenman](#): > > Asking to be invited to her pool may be the bold move you need. Somewhere, a person who cleans pools for a living is going to read your post & hate you. But they’ll also haul 20 extra gallons of chlorine out to their truck after reading the thread, so all-in-all, society is much better served because of it. Thank You! 😉 Also, didn’t the OP self identify in another thread as female? I’m glad the surgery went well & I hope all that extra chlorine doesn’t sting… **[SIZE=“1”][CindyLauper]“Guys just wanna have Se-hex…! Guys just wanna have… _SEX!!!_” [/CindyLauper][/SIZE]** **[ElaineBenes]“…You know, I just don’t know… Do you really think he’s filter-worthy?” [/ElaineBenes]** ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/33 "2015-08-27T02:48:39Z")
No advice, but I’m checking in so I’ll be subscribed. The aftermath of this ought to be good. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/34 "2015-08-27T02:51:34Z")
One more thing, remember to wash her before letting the air out. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/35 "2015-08-27T04:12:40Z")
I hope she kicks you in the crotch. I have no patience for jerks who don’t respect women. Clearly, you don’t. ---
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/36 "2015-08-27T04:27:34Z")
What is wrong with hoping for sex? How do you know the chick he is going on the date with isn’t interested? I mean I agree chances are low. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/37 "2015-08-27T04:42:02Z")
Make sure you shower and brush your teeth ahead of time. Wear something with personality. Women love a guy who’s a little on the edge. Also try to learn about tv shows and movies women like. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/38 "2015-08-27T05:50:11Z")
Where a button-down shirt but leave the last two or three buttons unbuttoned, wearing no t-shirt underneath. Top it off with a nice chain, something shiny (PROTIP: chicks like the gold). Strong cologne signals your intent. 🕶 it’s 🔛 ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/39 "2015-08-27T05:51:21Z")
For a first date, you’re just getting to know her. Coffee shops are neutral, unthreatening, fun places, so try that. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2015, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238/40 "2015-08-27T12:25:49Z")
Don’t dress rapey. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-on-a-first-date-with-a-cute-girl-i-met-online-any-advice/729238.md?page=3)