# Going to Nantucket! Need limericks. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 7, 2013, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365 "2013-11-07T22:56:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Bumbershoot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbershoot/32/3428_2.png) [@Bumbershoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbershoot)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/21 "2013-11-08T12:55:07Z")
We’re the forum called SDMB Fighting ignorance is our decree It comes from the Master Cecil’s knowledge is vaster He’s been fighting since '73 ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/22 "2013-11-08T15:19:29Z")
To his club footed son said Lord Stipple, As he poured his post-prandial tipple, “Your mother’s behavior Gave pain to our Savior And that’s why He made you a cripple.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/23 "2013-11-08T15:54:33Z")
[http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=66710&highlight=uppingham](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=66710&highlight=uppingham) ---
**Author:** ![Bambro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/df705f/32.png) [@Bambro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambro)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/24 "2013-11-08T16:10:52Z")
There once was a giantess named Dunn Who had sex with a midget for fun The poor little runt Got engulfed in her cunt And was born as the twin of his son ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/25 "2013-11-08T16:59:13Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > A young fellow named Cholmondeley Colquhoun, > Once kept as a pet a babolquhoun, > His mother said, “Cholmondeley, > Do you think it quite colmondeley, > To feed your babolquhoun with a spolquhoun?” There was a young fellow of St. Bartholomew’s Whose car went by fits and by St. Startholomew’s, Till a fellow named St. John Took a look at the t. John And fitted it out with spare St. Partholomew’s. “St. Bartholomew’s”, colloquially known as “Bart’s”; “St. John” pronounced “Sinjin” There was a young man from Peru Whose limerick stopped at line two. There was an old maid from Saigon, ---
**Author:** ![CurrlyD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@CurrlyD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CurrlyD)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/26 "2013-11-08T17:36:27Z")
She frowned and called him Mr. Because, in sport, he kr. And so, in spite, That very night, This Mr. kr. sr. There once was a man from St. Bees Who was stung on the arm by a wasp. When asked if it hurt He replied, “No it doesn’t. I’m so glad it wasn’t a hornet!” There once was a man from Japan Whose limericks never would scan. When told this was so He replied, “Yes, I know, But I always try to get just as many words in the last line as I possibly can.” ---
**Author:** ![Flywheel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Flywheel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flywheel)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/27 "2013-11-08T17:45:44Z")
There was a young fellow from Salisbury Whose manner was quite halisbury-scalisbury. He walked around Hampshire Without any pampshire Since no one could force him to walisbury! Salisbury a.k.a. Sarum, Hampshire abbreviated as Hants ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/28 "2013-11-08T18:03:13Z")
There was a young man from Chanute Who had warts all over his root He poured acid on these and now when he pees He fingers his root like a flute ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2013, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365/29 "2013-11-08T18:51:27Z")
The limerick form is complex, Its contents run chiefly to sex, It burgeons with virgins, And masculine urgeons, And swarms with erotic effex. The tenant in 344 Won’t pee in the pool anymore. Sounds silly to some, But not when it’s from His balcony on the third floor! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-nantucket-need-limericks/673365.md?page=1)