# Going to stripclubs **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 21, 2012, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517 "2012-02-21T12:03:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![polar\_bear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@polar\_bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/polar_bear)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/61 "2012-02-22T11:20:02Z")
> [@svrider](#): > > There are the lonely guys who visit every weekend and to pretend they are in some kind of relationship with the strippers. Groups of drunk young guys who get each other worked up about seeing some titties and people who just hang out there like in a regular bar, but with the added benefit of lots of pretty and flirtatious girls that approach and hang out with you. > > I’ve gone with colleagues as a fun way to end a night out and we’ve talked openly about it at work afterwards. In my experience it if you go with friends, it’s socially acceptable, if you go alone, it’s weird. Funny, the exact same thing goes for some type brothels as well. Some people come in groups, some come every day and spend it with a single girl and some come in drunk after midnight. Just as when I read **Huerta88** ’s post about the good food and drink with a nice scenery. Maybe that’s why there are few stripclubs in Germany, you can do the same in other clubs where you also have the option to get some one on one time, instead of just a lapdance. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/62 "2012-02-22T11:30:19Z")
I haven’t been to a strip club in well over a decade. There’s a group of guys at work that go weekly lunch for the “awesome” buffet. I’ve been invited to go, but seems a little gross to me to be eating a prime rib buffet while some women is spinning around a pole. Who know’s what’s going to get launched into the air and land in my prime rib. There’s a couple of different categories of men that go to strip clubs where I live. Guys that have just turned the legal age and want to see some titties. Drunk group of guys who happen to end up there, or single men who just want to gawk, these are the serial strip club attendees. Then theres single men who hope to start a relationship with a stripper, also serial strip club attendees. I knew of one naive acquaintance who told me about this really awesome dancer that had the “hots for him” in his own words. He told me she was really nice and talked to him, didn’t even dance for him for some songs. But he paid her for each song. I had a hard time convincing him that’s what he was paying them to do is be nice to you. ---
**Author:** ![Khendrask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3e96dc/32.png) [@Khendrask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khendrask)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/63 "2012-02-22T11:39:32Z")
> [@Blake](#): > > …I know of one who had employed a prostitute domestically… Am I the only person here that read that as having a hooker maid? Wonder what that says about me… Hrm… ---
**Author:** ![Mycroft\_Holmes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a5b964/32.png) [@Mycroft\_Holmes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mycroft_Holmes)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/64 "2012-02-22T12:23:18Z")
> [@polar\_bear](#): > > Maybe that’s why there are few stripclubs in Germany, you can do the same in other clubs where you also have the option to get some one on one time, instead of just a lapdance. I think this is probably it. Why go to a strip bar, when you can go to an FKK club like this: http:/ /www.fkk - [oase.de](http://oase.de) (link NSFW, so I broke it up). You can use the pool, sauna, have a good meal and get one on one time for what some people would spend in one night at a strip club. ---
**Author:** ![svrider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb8c5e/32.png) [@svrider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/svrider)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/65 "2012-02-22T12:51:31Z")
It may be different for Germany, but contrary to strip clubs, it’s not my impression that it’s socially acceptable here to visit prostitutes. I imagine the stigma alone would make some guys go to a strip club instead and either dream of that small chance of picking up a dancer or at least find one that provides extras and then being able to convince themselves it’s not a prostitute they’ve been with. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/66 "2012-02-22T13:38:47Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Ugh…if I wanted some girl to talk my ear off all night, I’d stay home with my girlfriend. And if I wanted to see tits & ass and be around a woman pretending to like me, I’d watch Skinemax with my mom. ---
**Author:** ![polar\_bear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@polar\_bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/polar_bear)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/67 "2012-02-22T13:47:14Z")
> [@Mycroft\_Holmes](#): > > I think this is probably it. Why go to a strip bar, when you can go to an FKK club like this: http:/ /www.fkk - [oase.de](http://oase.de) (link NSFW, so I broke it up). > > You can use the pool, sauna, have a good meal and get one on one time for what some people would spend in one night at a strip club. Well that’s actually my favorite club, if you’re just there for the side show you’re better off somewhere else (FKK World in Giessen for instance). The food is crap. They’re adding a wing though, supposedly with a restaurant… In contrast to stripclubs though, visiting a FKK club isn’t really something people are open about. It is very much a taboo. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/68 "2012-02-22T15:20:31Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > And if I wanted to see tits & ass and be around a woman pretending to like me, I’d watch Skinemax with my mom. That’s…disturbing…on many levels. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/69 "2012-02-22T15:36:51Z")
Like a lot of behavior, if it is done by someone in their 20s and in moderation not that big a deal, but if it is done frequently and by someone older than 30 = sad. ---
**Author:** ![Huerta88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/82dd89/32.png) [@Huerta88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Huerta88)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/70 "2012-02-22T17:28:46Z")
> [@Ibanez](#): > > Then theres single men who hope to start a relationship with a stripper, also serial strip club attendees. I knew of one naive acquaintance who told me about this really awesome dancer that had the “hots for him” in his own words. He told me she was really nice and talked to him, didn’t even dance for him for some songs. > > But he paid her for each song. I had a hard time convincing him that’s what he was paying them to do is be nice to you. Especially when I was younger I knew **a lot** of guys who had dating a stripper as a major life goal, and I knew a few who actually did (thus re-inspiring the rest). It’s a superficially understandable goal. The girls are hot. They are hot girls who are super-friendly to strangers, even socially awkward strangers. People in general don’t behave any more nicely than they have to to get what they want, and hot young girls generally can get what they want without trying very hard at all. So when they do, it’s highly anomalous, and the anomalous can lead to disrupted logical thought. And let it be said, these girls are generally very, very good at acting like the nicest girlfriend in the world. To a lonely blue-balled guy, that’s a potent combination. I’d call it testosterone poisoning but I suspect it works, mutatis mutandis, in both directions. **A lot** of women might nurture delusions or fantasies of a relationship if they met George Clooney and he was suavely flirting with them. I can see and have seen many guys convince themselves that they had a chance. “The stripper took my number!” Okay, sure. Of course she did. That locked in her tips. She probably also told you she didn’t have a boyfriend, and whatever else she needed to to keep alive an ambiguous possibility of something more with her. Even the downsides of strippers (drugs, horrible lifestyle, drama queening) could have some appeal to some guys. Drama queens often generate lots of manic, spontaneous energy, which can be fun, for awhile, in small doses. Hanging out with strippers (I did briefly as my earlier post mentioned knowing the owner – I had no delusions I’d hook up) is a wild ride even if you’re not participating in all the craziness. Finally, hot non-stripper girls (or maybe stripper friends from other venues), or management’s hot girlfriends, or naughty girls out on a lark, do go to strip clubs, and I’ve seen guys hope (never with any luck) to make that connection. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/71 "2012-02-22T17:33:56Z")
Interesting old thread: [Ask the stripper](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=423735). ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/72 "2012-02-22T18:14:47Z")
> [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](#): > > Do you have any sort of evidence for that? > > I can only speak anecdotally, but I’ve associated with a wide gamut of young American males, between being in the Army, going to a very liberal philosophy school, and holding down a white-collar corporate desk job. No matter the demographic, it’s generally expected that young men in their early twenties will occasionally hit up a strip club at least once or twice. Even my gay buddies will come along for bachelor’s parties or for that rare weird night where there’s nothing much to do and somebody suggests going just to see if things have suddenly gotten magical cool (they haven’t.) > > Hearing someone above the age of 25 say they’ve _never_ been to strip club is somewhat along the lines of hearing that someone has never seen Die Hard 2, or been to see the local minor league baseball team. Sure. My evidence is the same as yours. Anecdotal. My point being that anyone who thinks that ‘everyone’ goes to a strip club at least a few times only says that because they spend time with people for whom that is true (and, to a lesser extent, believe the cultural memes purported onto us by the likes of Charlie Sheen). All I am saying is that what you and others would like to believe is part of your American identity is in fact merely part of your specific sub-set of the American population. And, I’m willing to bet that it’s also not that unusual to find people who haven’t been to a local minor league game either. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/73 "2012-02-22T18:24:49Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > There are pole dancing classes offered in strip malls, \. Because of zoning, I’ve seen areas with strip clubs concentrated in them, but you have a whole actual \*mall \*of stripping? That sounds awesome!!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/74 "2012-02-22T18:34:13Z")
> [@psychonaut](#): > > Then please read the paper I linked to, which contains references to hard data and statistics on strip club visits. He cites [this study](http://popcenter.uchicago.edu/data/nhsls.shtml) of people 18-44 years old, that claims 17 million people in that demographic went to strip clubs in 1991. The table in his paper that gives you your 20.68% of men attending comes from a [different](http://www.norc.org/Research/Projects/Pages/general-social-survey.aspx) survey. There is something amiss, as those two numbers don’t add up. I think we’re misreading (or the author is not representing clearly for the purposes of this thread) the second statistic. Assuming 17M figure comes from a split-gender survey, and most of those 17M are men, that still gives us ~15% of the male population from the first number, and 20% from the second. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/75 "2012-02-22T19:25:08Z")
This thread is making me laugh, because I don’t fit into any of the categories that people seem convinced make up the typical strip club clientele. I am middle-aged and happily married. I don’t frequent strip clubs by any means, but I have a couple of like-minded friends and when we get together, the evening may possibly include a visit. When I travel alone, I also might stop in if it’s convenient. My wife knows this and doesn’t mind. I am not there to get laid. I am not there to find a girlfriend. I don’t even particularly enjoy talking to the strippers, usually. I go because I like to go out for a few drinks on occasion, and I enjoy looking at pretty girls in various states of undress. And that’s pretty much it. You really don’t have to dig too deeply into the male psyche to figure this out. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/76 "2012-02-22T19:35:26Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > Because of zoning, I’ve seen areas with strip clubs concentrated in them, but you have a whole actual \*mall \*of stripping? That sounds awesome!!! 😃 But stay away from the food court. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/77 "2012-02-22T19:47:37Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > But stay away from the food court. Especially the taco stand. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/78 "2012-02-22T20:46:47Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > Especially the taco stand. Yeah, the fish tacos are… questionable. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![GreasyJack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/df705f/32.png) [@GreasyJack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreasyJack)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2012, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517/79 "2012-02-22T23:08:19Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > It’s not all just innocent fun, nor is it a victimless operation in most cases. The proliferation of strip clubs is usually a symptom of an uptick in sex trade. Portland has a huge number of strip joints, and this corresponds with Portland being 2nd in the nation in sex trade, attracting hookers, junkies, dealers and pimps alike. Women strip for a variety of reasons, not all of which are to buy drugs, but to dismiss it as a harmless activity and nobody’s business but their own is to turn a blind eye to sexual predation and dehumanization of women. Even if it’s not something as extreme as this, the labor practices at most US strip clubs are pretty iffy. A very common arrangement is where the girls are ostensibly contractors who merely rent the stage space, but they are obligated to perform at hours dictated by management. What this means is that though they can make a lot of money during busy times, very often they’re forced to work for little or even nothing during slow shifts. If such a system is fairly administered, and they sometimes are, it should all even out and everyone should make an okay living (though not in line with the common perception of how well strippers are paid). But if the system isn’t fairly administered, it can end up with girls who are out of favor with management working for less than minimum wage, while girls who are willing to consent to questionable arrangements with management (both financial and otherwise) get all the good hours. I personally don’t buy into the idea that the sex industry is inherently degrading or exploitative, but treating their workers poorly seems to be the rule. Not that there aren’t clubs out there that more-or-less treat their workers fairly, but it’s next to impossible for the customer to figure that out (not that most care). I’m already somewhat put off by the whole forced social dynamic inherent to the strip club, but having to wonder if they’re being paid a living wage to flirt with me really goes over the line for me. My friends never believe be that I won’t go to strip clubs with them because of their labor practices, but there you have it. If we ever make it down to the bay area, they can take me to the unionized, employee-owned Lusty Lady. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/going-to-stripclubs/613517.md?page=3)