# Good news/bad news -- game **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 14, 2003, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916 "2003-06-14T23:21:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/81 "2003-06-16T20:13:33Z")
The bad news is, Ted Kennedy’s driving. The good news is, you have 10 minutes left to live. ---
**Author:** ![Aholibah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Aholibah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aholibah)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/82 "2003-06-16T21:29:08Z")
The bad news is you’re already too weak to fight off the buzzards. (For **WhiteyFoo** , who had a good one lost in simulpost): The good news is your tests came back negative. ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/83 "2003-06-16T22:32:41Z")
The bad news is they were IQ test. The good news is you are J. K. Rowling. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/84 "2003-06-16T22:48:17Z")
The bad news is you’re not **the** J.K. Rowling, and the jokes are getting treally annoying. The good news is your rich eccentric aunt left her entire estate to you. ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/85 "2003-06-16T22:58:18Z")
The bad news is it’s 10,000 cats. The good news is your neighbor has a hungry dog you can bowrrow. ---
**Author:** ![xvxdarkknightxvx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/34f0e0/32.png) [@xvxdarkknightxvx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xvxdarkknightxvx)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/86 "2003-06-16T22:58:56Z")
The bad news is your aunt is a 9 foot tall superintelligent lobster and has no plans of dying. The good news is the checks stopped bouncing. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/87 "2003-06-16T22:59:45Z")
The bad news is her estate consists of mothballs that are priceless on the collector’s circuit and a priceless hairless cat. The good news is that you bumped into that pretty girl on the train… ---
**Author:** ![Electronic\_Chaos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Electronic\_Chaos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electronic_Chaos)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/88 "2003-06-17T00:33:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Q.E.D. \* > \*\*The bad news is it’s 10,000 cats. > > The good news is your neighbor has a hungry dog you can bowrrow. \*\* The bad news is he’s hungry for love The good news is the stain came out of your pants. ---
**Author:** ![mr.splitfoot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8e8cbc/32.png) [@mr.splitfoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mr.splitfoot)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/89 "2003-06-17T00:44:24Z")
The bad news is now it’s staining your lips. The good news is it’s a flattering shade of red. ---
**Author:** ![Electronic\_Chaos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Electronic\_Chaos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electronic_Chaos)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/90 "2003-06-17T01:00:59Z")
The bad news is it’s also carcinogenic. The good news is you found pirate’s gold. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/91 "2003-06-17T01:49:21Z")
The bad news is that’s Chocolate Cake’s nickname for his, well, you know… The good news is you’re in charge of the company for the week. ---
**Author:** ![xvxdarkknightxvx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/34f0e0/32.png) [@xvxdarkknightxvx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xvxdarkknightxvx)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/92 "2003-06-17T01:55:03Z")
The bad news is it’s Enron, and your company seems to have employed even more whisteblowers. The good news is they’re all crossing guards. ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/93 "2003-06-17T01:55:36Z")
The bad news is the SEC just filed charges against it. The good news is you’ve got vacation time coming. ---
**Author:** ![Electronic\_Chaos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Electronic\_Chaos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electronic_Chaos)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/94 "2003-06-17T02:22:36Z")
The bad news is the only place the travel agency has an opening for is Hell. The good news is there’s is booze in Hell. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/95 "2003-06-17T02:26:42Z")
The bad news is you don’t drink. The good news is you just got called to “Come on Down!” on _The Price Is Right._ ---
**Author:** ![IcicleFuzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ba8739/32.png) [@IcicleFuzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IcicleFuzz)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/96 "2003-06-17T02:31:58Z")
The bad news is you’re only wearing a cooking apron. The good news is you just won a new car! ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/97 "2003-06-17T02:55:07Z")
That bad news is it’s a Yugo. The good news is you won the spinoff for the the Showcase Showdown. ---
**Author:** ![Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krisfer_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/98 "2003-06-17T03:04:56Z")
The bad news is the Showdown is a knife thrower… and you are the target. The good news is the show has a doctor on staff. ---
**Author:** ![IcicleFuzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ba8739/32.png) [@IcicleFuzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IcicleFuzz)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/99 "2003-06-17T03:08:16Z")
The bad news is that he only has a PhD in Chemistry. The good news is those scars are healing really well. ---
**Author:** ![Electronic\_Chaos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Electronic\_Chaos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electronic_Chaos)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916/100 "2003-06-17T03:11:25Z")
The bad news is those herpes sores aren’t. The good news is you got a telephone from your old highschool crush. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/good-news-bad-news-game/181916.md?page=6)