# Goon, you're free! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** movies\ **Created:** [November 29, 2025, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240 "2025-11-29T22:12:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/21 "2025-11-30T19:41:59Z")
Then please explain. The only other reading I can imagine is “CITY OFF ICES”, but that doesn’t make sense. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/22 "2025-11-30T19:44:57Z")
I edited my post to make it more clear. If you still don’t understand, let me know. I could talk about kerning all day long! An underappreciated art. ETA: since you edited your post @EinsteinsHund , I think I now understand what you don’t get. The joke is not that the bad kerning is causing the one word to look like 2 different words, though that would have made a better joke; it’s just the fact that the bad kerning exists, and that it’s very annoying to those of us who notice it. ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/23 "2025-11-30T19:45:22Z")
never mind. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/24 "2025-11-30T19:52:35Z")
When it’s braille typeface it’s the blind leading the blind ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/25 "2025-11-30T19:53:19Z")
> [@solost](#): > > The joke is not that the bad kerning is causing the one word to look like 2 different words, though that would have made a better joke; it’s just the fact that the bad kerning exists, Yeah, I was doing the same thing, trying to perceive something amusingly obscene or risqué lurking in the bad kerning. The bad kerning itself, I saw. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/26 "2025-11-30T20:02:15Z")
> [@AHunter3](#): > > Yeah, I was doing the same thing, trying to perceive something amusingly obscene or risqué lurking in the bad kerning. The bad kerning itself, I saw. Same for me. And that makes it the lamest joke I’ve seen on xkcd. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/27 "2025-11-30T20:24:46Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > I’m old enough to remember Alice the Goon on the syndicated Popeye cartoons when I was a kid. But to me, a ‘goon’ is a large, stupid, violent criminal henchman. Note that ‘Trump’s goons’ is being used currently to refer to ICE and other enforcers of Trump’s decrees. > > I only learned the ‘masturbate’ definition a week or two ago. Yeah, that is what Goon means I never heard the so-called “new definition” until today, and I will bet it is transient. ---
**Author:** ![Zoobi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/13edae/32.png) [@Zoobi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoobi)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/28 "2025-11-30T20:26:49Z")
I’ll take that bet. Goon has two main definitions now, like it or not. ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/29 "2025-11-30T20:46:22Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > > [@Ponderoid](#): > > > > “MEGAFLICKS”. > > Much like the now-infamous “10 FLICKERING LIGHTS” When I was a kid, I had an Archie comic where they mentioned watching a “SCIENCE FLICK” in class. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/30 "2025-11-30T20:48:22Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > > [@AHunter3](#): > > > > Yeah, I was doing the same thing, trying to perceive something amusingly obscene or risqué lurking in the bad kerning. The bad kerning itself, I saw. > > Same for me. And that makes it the lamest joke I’ve seen on xkcd. Oh no, if bad kerning bothers you, it’s a very funny strip. I laughed out loud, and a friend who does typesetting professionally has named it one of his favorites. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/31 "2025-11-30T21:04:04Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > And that makes it the lamest joke I’ve seen on xkcd. XKCD has never been about “jokes”. This one clearly wasn’t trying to be a joke - it’s just an observation. “Oh my gosh, that annoys me too!” is a valid reaction to that comic, as is “I’ve never noticed bad type spacing before, is this a thing?” ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/32 "2025-11-30T21:07:26Z")
Yet the amount of letter separation in the strip that everyone sees as bad kerning is about equal to the gap between Go and On, so that must be a reasonable amount of separation. Goon with a masturbatory meaning gets only three hits out of the first hundred on Google, two from Reddit, both asking about the term goon and both getting responses that throw in the masturbatory term as one among many. It’s the first two definitions on [Urbandictionary](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=goon), but the next twenty are for a variety of other meanings. Yes, people today ludicrously find sexual meaning in every word and phrase and share it on the internet like middle schoolers. Nevertheless, goon is known by way too narrow a segment of society for the makers of the Wicked cup to give a flying fuck about. If subculture slang is to determine what the rest of the population sees, there soon won’t be any writing at all. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/33 "2025-11-30T21:09:39Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > XKCD has never been about “jokes”. Yeah, I agree that xkcd doesn’t go for cheap jokes in general, but I must say I had a lot of good laughs from the site, especially if the strips are about my profession, IT. ---
**Author:** ![penultima\_thule](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penultima_thule/32/3833_2.png) [@penultima\_thule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/penultima_thule)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/34 "2025-11-30T22:00:06Z")
On this side of the puddle the term “goon” is used for the proudly Australian invention [wine-in-a-box](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Box_wine), typically 4L of sweet, fruity white wine and usually the cheapest alcohol available at liquor stores . Invented in 1964 based on a similar product used to transport & dispense battery acid, which should be illustrative.. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/35 "2025-11-30T22:23:17Z")
> [@Exapno\_Mapcase](#): > > Goon with a masturbatory meaning gets only three hits out of the first hundred on Google, two from Reddit > > … > > Nevertheless, goon is known by way too narrow a segment of society for the makers of the Wicked cup to give a flying fuck about. If subculture slang is to determine what the rest of the population sees, there soon won’t be any writing at all. Try searching for the form “gooning”. Some of the more mainstream hits: Wired > **[Young Mormons Built an App to Help Men Quit Gooning](https://www.wired.com/story/young-mormons-built-an-app-to-help-men-quit-gooning/)** > > The Relay app allows users to track their porn-free streaks and get group support. Its creators say they’re taking a stand against porn and AI erotica. Cosmo > **[What Does Gooning Actually Mean?](https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a65418496/what-is-gooning/)** > > The once-niche kink has officially taken over the internet, and its meaning has evolved from describing a very specific sex act to...a little bit of everything and nothing all at once! Men’s Health > **[Everything You Need to Know About Gooning](https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a69124896/gooning/)** > > Self-proclaimed "gooners" explain its appeal. The Daily Mail > **[Gooning: UK's fastest growing fetish could fuel erectile dysfunction](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-14247583/gooning-sex-fetish-popular-erectile-dysfunction.html)** > > Experts warned MailOnline that fans of the growing sexual trend could risk suffering from issues like erectile dysfunction and potential pornography addition due to their habit. Essence > **[Let’s Talk About Sex: What Exactly Is Gooning? | Essence](https://www.essence.com/lifestyle/lets-talk-about-sex-gooning/)** > > Gooning takes experiencing solo orgasms and pleasure to the next level. Learn more about the newest sex trend here. This is yet another among many instances of people jumping to the conclusion that since _you_ don’t know a term, then most other people don’t, either ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/36 "2025-11-30T22:44:11Z")
I would have thought that the need for recent articles to explain a term that they didn’t think their readers would know says exactly the opposite. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/37 "2025-11-30T22:52:07Z")
It is an example of “explain to the old people what all the young people are already saying”. By the stage that there are lots of articles having to explain a word to the old, then that word definitely isn’t rare among the young. [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5DlTexEXxLQ/hqdefault.jpg "The Simpsons - I Used To Be With It (Abe Simpson Rant)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5DlTexEXxLQ) ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/38 "2025-11-30T23:01:14Z")
“Go on” does seem to one of those phrases that should be one word, similar to how “no one” isn’t but “nobody” was allowed to be as opposed to “no body.” Lead Belly, et al., simply adopted “gwan, now,” as it suited them. ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/39 "2025-11-30T23:13:14Z")
The “young” is a conveniently elastic term. The question we’re dealing with here is whether the “young” includes the audience for Wicked theater cups. If they are too young to know this part of the internet and their parents who would be paying for them are too old, then why would the makers care that the assholes of the internet would go all giggity on them? They’ve done this a million times before. I’d really like some examples when this behavior changed anything or made people afterward take care. Not to mention that goon has plenty of other negative meanings that probably far more people are aware of since they’ve been around for decades or centuries. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2025, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240/40 "2025-11-30T23:16:52Z")
> [@Exapno\_Mapcase](#): > > If they are too young to know this part of the internet I _really_ don’t think children are the main market demographic for _Wicked_. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goon-youre-free/1025240.md?page=3)