# Gore Bashing!  Step right up!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [September 28, 2000, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911 "2000-09-28T19:18:56Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Ivar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ivar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ivar)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/21 "2000-09-29T15:36:23Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by MysterEcks \*
> 
> Besides, Al and Tipper were the basis for _Love Story,_\*\*

If that was true, then wouldn’t that bitch be dead?

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**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/22 "2000-09-29T15:56:57Z")

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I saw Jello Biafra last week as part of the Spitfire tour. (He was, of course, a famous PMRC defendant, over the Frankenchrist album, IIRC.) He was a correspondent for someone at the Democratic National Convention, and once while he was up in the stands everyone started waving around signs that said, “Tipper Rocks”. (He showed one of the signs.)

“How brazen a re-writing of history is this?” he asked.

[rant]I’m really tired of all this “Al Gore said he invented the Internet!” crap. He said no such thing–he said he took initiative in inventing the Internet, and he did go a long way toward popularizing the idea, IMO. If I help raise money to build a new hospital, and I then say, “I took initiative in building that hospital”, do you think that I am claiming to have laid the bricks and poured the concrete myself?

There are plenty of reasons not to like Al Gore without beating this poorly worded statement from long ago like the dead horse it has become.[/rant]

I do have to give Al credit for one quip, though–before one of the segments of his MTV “town hall”, they told him that they were going to talk about the Internet and the environment. He said, “Did you know that I invented the environment?”

Dr. J

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**Author:** ![dietrologia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@dietrologia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dietrologia)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/23 "2000-09-29T15:59:03Z")

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I’ve got a problem with a dude (Gore) whose decision to send our troops to liberate Kuewait was based on the number of prime-time minutes he would be given on the floor of the Senate.

The Republicans promised him more time, so he voted with them to send troops.

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**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/24 "2000-09-29T17:44:26Z")

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All’s fair in Love and with Gore. He’ll say anything…

“If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.”  
…Al Gore

“Democrats understand the importance of bondage between a mother and  
child.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“Welcome to President Clinton, Mrs. Clinton, and my fellow astronauts.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“Mars is essentially in the same orbit…Mars is somewhat the same  
distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures  
where there are canals, we believe, and water.  
If there is water, that meansthere is  
oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 8/11/94

“The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation’s history.  
I mean in this century’s history. But we all lived in this century.  
I didn’t live in this century.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 9/15/95

“I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and  
democracy - but that could change.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 5/22/98

“One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president,  
and that one word is ‘to be prepared’.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 12/6/93

“Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 11/30/96

“I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments  
in the future.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“The future will be better tomorrow.”  
…Vice President Al Gore  
“We’re going to have the best educated American people in the world.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 9/21/97

“People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions  
and have a tremendous impact on history.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“I stand by all the misstatements that I’ve made.”  
…Vice President Al Gore to Sam Donaldson, 8/17/93

“We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a  
firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“Public speaking is very easy.”  
…Vice President Al Gore to reporters in 10/9  
“I am not part of the problem. I am a Democrat.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the  
polls.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

"When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in L.A.,  
my answer has been direct & simple:  
Who is to blame for the riots?  
The rioters are to blame.  
Who is to blame for the killings?  
The killers are to blame.  
…Al Gore

“Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not  
having it.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 5/20/96

“We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 9/22/97

“For NASA, space is still a high priority.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 9/5/93  
“Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our  
children.”  
…Vice President Al Gore, 9/18/95

“The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Al  
Gore may or may not make.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“We’re all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on  
the mistakes we may or may not have made.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the  
impurities in our air and water that are doing it.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

“[It’s] time for the human race to enter the solar system.”  
…Vice President Al Gore

And of course to all users of the Internet, the all time favorite  
quotation of Mr. Al Gore: “…As many of you know, I was very  
instrumental in the founding of the Internet.”  
…Al Gore to Katie Couric 3/99

Vote for Harry Potter…he may actually have a spell to turn politicians into real human beings.

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/25 "2000-09-29T17:53:32Z")

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Great post **Tradesilicon**!

Sadly, it’s taken Al Gore almost ten years to spew out as many verbal gaffes as Dubya can produce in a single week. Other than that, they’re still both a bunch of dweebs.

::grins::

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**Author:** ![jab1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ee7513/32.png) [@jab1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jab1)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/26 "2000-09-29T17:59:42Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by DoctorJ \*  
> **[rant]I’m really tired of all this “Al Gore said he invented the Internet!” crap. He said no such thing–he said he took initiative in inventing the Internet, and he did go a long way toward popularizing the idea, IMO.**

Click here: [www.snopes.com/quotes/internet.htm](http://www.snopes.com/quotes/internet.htm) to read what REALLY happened. But even though Gore did not claim he invented the internet, he seems to have overstated what he DID do.

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**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/27 "2000-09-29T18:04:38Z")

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I love AL.

I loved Bill and I was thrilled when he was elected and I’ve loved him all along. His sexual dalliances didn’t faze me.

I will be twice as thrilled when Al gets elected.

And the OP had it absolutely right about Dubya.

And in keeping with the topic: he talks really funny when he’s trying to make a point. Happy?

stoid

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**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/28 "2000-09-29T18:26:59Z")

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Bush and education:

A friend of mine sent me this:

[http://www.venturacountydemocrats.com/images/repubican.jpg](http://www.venturacountydemocrats.com/images/repubican.jpg)

Maybe the other party is “Democats,” or perhaps, “Demorats.”

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**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/29 "2000-09-29T19:07:12Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Dylan \*  
> \*\*exxxccuuuuuuuuuuuse me…
> 
> Al loves the Grateful Dead…he invited them to the white house…and he ADMITS he inhaled…
> 
> I love Al. \*\*

😕 😕 😕 😕 😕 😕

I thought that Al invented the Grateful Dead?

😕 😕 😕 😕 😕 😕

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**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/30 "2000-09-29T19:24:28Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zenster \*  
> \*\*Great post **Tradesilicon**!
> 
> Sadly, it’s taken Al Gore almost ten years to spew out as many verbal gaffes as Dubya can produce in a single week. Other than that, they’re still both a bunch of dweebs.
> 
> ::grins::
> 
> \*\*

Hear, hear. My favorite: “I am not part of the problem. I am a Democrat.” Could be a new sigline!

To be fair (not that that’s the point in these kinds of threads, even when I’m the OP), some of those “misstatements” are only misstatements if you disagree with him, and some need to be stripped of context in order to seem silly. But isn’t the last one a misquote? I thought he claimed to be instrumental in “creating” the Internet, not “founding” it?

And I of course agree that neither Gore nor Bush (favorite comedian’s line: “Bush and Gore? that’s not a presidential campaign. That’s a snuff film!”) is the apex of human evolution. But Bush is so much easier to make fun of.

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**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/31 "2000-09-29T19:35:19Z")

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When Al Gore was running for Congress in 1976 in gun-lovin’ Tennessee he was “pro-gun” and after being elected received ‘A’ and ‘B’ ratings from the NRA’s Institute for Legislative Action for ten years. He voted for the Gun Owners Protection Act in 1986, voted against 14-day waiting periods for handguns, and said that anti-gun laws “haven’t been an effective solution to the problem of violent crime.”

When running for Pres. in 1988 Gore flipped 180 degrees, he voted to ban semi-autos, _for_ waiting periods for handguns, legislation to register gun-owners, etc.

Talk about “waffling” on issues.

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**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/32 "2000-09-29T20:07:36Z")

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OK, andros is pissed.

He’s had it.

Rant #1:

_ **Why the fuck can’t we have a simple thread bashing a goddamn professional politician without people realizing that he’s no different than any other goddamn professional politician??** _

I mean, what the fuck, guys? How can anyone honestly laud one of these idiot while bashing the other? Dub and Algore are the SAME FUCKING PERSON!! They both lie, they both say whatever they need to in order to get elected! Jeezus, how the hell can you claim one is the saviour of umanity while lambasting the other when he’s doing the EXACT SAME THING??

And are you really that fucking surprised when a pol changes position on something in exchange for votes? Read my lips, no new taxes. I did not have sex with that woman. I have no knowledge of that, Senator.

Rant #2:

_ **Why the fuck are we as a nation spending so much time bitching about our current and potential elected officials instead of getting off our indolent, apathetic American asses and for Christ’s sake DOING something about it??** _

Bush sucks! No, Gore sucks! My candidate can beat up your candidate! Nuh-uh! Can too! Can not!

Allah in an indycar, kids! Until we stop rewarding these people for lying to us, _ **THEY WON’T STOP!** _

Get it?

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/33 "2000-09-29T20:51:23Z")

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Spamdammit **Andros**! The rant is a solid 8.5, but I’m tempted to nudge it to a 9.0 just for the “Allah in an indycar” crack. What’s not to like?

You have neatly encapsulated most of my feelings in your post. It’s why I started this thread in the first place. Keep up the good work!

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**Author:** ![Flymaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c4cdca/32.png) [@Flymaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flymaster)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/34 "2000-09-29T20:51:29Z")

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Guys…you guys are the kings of snopes.

That whole list is a list of QUAYLEisms. Look it up on snopes. I’ll brb with a link. One sec.

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**Author:** ![Flymaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c4cdca/32.png) [@Flymaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flymaster)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/35 "2000-09-29T20:52:58Z")

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[http://www.snopes.com/quotes/quayle.htm](http://www.snopes.com/quotes/quayle.htm)

There you go. Looks like the REPUBLICANS will say anything to make Gore look bad.

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**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/36 "2000-09-29T20:55:48Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Flymaster \*  
> \*\*Guys…you guys are the kings of snopes.
> 
> That whole list is a list of QUAYLEisms. Look it up on snopes. I’ll brb with a link. One sec. \*\*

. . . I wondered why none of them seemed familiar to me as Goriosities.

In any case, I’m with Andros 100%. Despite my frequent bushbashing in these forums (fora?), I have little more respect for Gore. It’s my own laziness at work: bush is just an easier target.

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**Author:** ![Girl\_Next\_Door](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/977dab/32.png) [@Girl\_Next\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_Next_Door)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/37 "2000-09-29T20:58:54Z")

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…ha ha ha ha!

That’s one I’ll be stealing. You can bet on it.

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**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/38 "2000-09-29T21:00:05Z")

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Thank you, flymaster. Tradesilicon will no doubt ask a moderator to remove his post as soon as he can see his computer through ALL THE EGG ON HIS FACE!

This just makes me so happy.

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**Author:** ![Flymaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c4cdca/32.png) [@Flymaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flymaster)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/39 "2000-09-29T21:03:07Z")

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I try 🙂

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**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2000, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gore-bashing-step-right-up/34911/40 "2000-09-29T21:14:36Z")

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lissener,

IT’S A FUCKING JOKE THREAD! GET IT? Oh well, play again next time, when the prize will be a real ability to listen!!

Excuse me while I fry this stuff, scrambled, my favorite!

(By the way, they are not all Quale-isms, at least several are quotes attributed to Gore from recorded programs. So there, you can have some of the egg white).

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