# goround zero of jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 30, 2011, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240 "2011-04-30T00:56:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/21 "2011-04-30T02:39:14Z")
About 40% of this site consists of cheap puns. Cheap puns are our bread and butter! You’ll get my cheap puns from me when you pry them from my cold dead hands. Or was it cold bread pans?\* You know what was the Ground Zero of jokes? The thread of 9/11 black humor. You sure are easily offended, OP. \*In honor of the fact that another 40% of the site consists of pedantry and nitpicking, allow me to state that I am aware that this is a Spoonerism, not a pun. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/22 "2011-04-30T02:40:41Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Without context, though… Kind of the point, isn’t it? The OP objected to your joke as unnecessary. He provided no link and no context. Jokes are not a rarity around these parts. **Cecil Adams** makes unnecesary jokes; so does **Ed** ; so do the mods and admins; so do we. Humor, or attempted humor, is part of the culture of the SDMB. The objection to your joke as unnecessary is invalid. Therefore, the only question, and it is one that cannot be answered without a link or context, is: was it a **good** joke? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/23 "2011-04-30T02:44:25Z")
It pissed off **scamartistry** , which is a point in its favor. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/24 "2011-04-30T02:44:59Z")
> [@scamartistry](#): > > Fellow dopers: Big fan of this forum , however I feel it has been extra polluted by unecessary “jokes” and puns lately. > I find this business repulsive. This is the pit so I speak my mind I hope. I will from now on read as many threads as I can and harvest the worst of the worst , and publish them here (name included of course). Why am I doing this? because I am tired of this tongue-in-cheek stuff, it’s cheap and make me read a lot of nonsense i don’t need to, I am herer to read something resembling acts- not your soccermom jokes. > > To illustrate the gravity of the problem i present to you this “joke”. I reger to this comment as GROUND ZERO, it can’t be worse: > > “Join Date: Nov 2000 > Canada’s had gay marriage for over six years now. > \*\*Are Americans a bunch of chickens? bwock-bwock-bwock! > over six years now. > \*\*” > > "jokes(?)/comments like this should never be tolerated > > To be continued…Im on the hunt, keep your jokes at home people, if you want, it’s up to you umadbro? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/25 "2011-04-30T02:45:41Z")
“Well, it was set in Vietnam and since three people got killed, it was a melee massacre!” ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/26 "2011-04-30T02:53:57Z")
Huh. This thread presents a bit of a dilemma for me. Initially, I read it as a humorous way of collecting good jokes from other Pit threads in one place. However, it’s also possible that the OP is serious, and is genuinely pitting people for making jokes in Pit threads. The dilemma is, if my initial read is correct, then this thread is in the wrong forum - joke threads aren’t allowed in the Pit. On the other hand, if the OP is serious, I should leave it here, and let every one make fun of him for being a humorless jag off. Help me out here, **scamartistry**. Should I put my Mod hat on, and move this thread to MPSIMS, or take my mod hat off and call you an asshole? ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/27 "2011-04-30T02:57:28Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > Cool! We get to do this now? All right, then: I declare that verbs are no longer allowed! Some people the mistake of Shunt’s work a load of rubbish about railway timetables, but clever people like me, who loudly in restaurants, this as a deliberate ambiguity, a plea for understanding in a mechanized world. The points frozen, the beast dead. What the difference? What indeed the point? The point frozen, the beast late out of Paddington. The point taken. If La Fontaine’s elk would Tom Jones the engine must our head, the dining car our oesophagus, the guard’s van our left lung, the cattle truck our shins, the first-class compartment the piece of skin at the nape of the neck and the level crossing an electric elk called Simon. The clarity. But where the ambiguity? It over there in a box. Shunt the 8.15 from Gillingham when in reality he the 8.13 from Gillingham. The train the same only the time altered. Ecce homo, ergo elk. La Fontaine his sister and her bloody well. The point taken, the beast moulting, the fluff up your nose. The illusion complete; it reality, the reality illusion and the ambiguity the only truth. But the truth, as Hitchcock observes, in the box? No there not room, the ambiguity on weight. The point, the elk dead, the beast at Swindon, Chabrol at nothing, I treatment and La Fontaine can. The point crystal clear, bouncy bouncy. ---
**Author:** ![Crawlspace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Crawlspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crawlspace)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/28 "2011-04-30T03:03:01Z")
Do you want some cheese to go with that whine? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/29 "2011-04-30T04:27:03Z")
i can haz jokez? ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/30 "2011-04-30T05:54:59Z")
I bought another colander. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/31 "2011-04-30T06:44:30Z")
> [@John\_DiFool](#): > > Some people the mistake of Shunt’s work a load of rubbish about railway timetables, but clever people like me, who loudly in restaurants, this as a deliberate ambiguity, a plea for understanding in a mechanized world. The points frozen, the beast dead. What the difference? What indeed the point? The point frozen, the beast late out of Paddington. The point taken. If La Fontaine’s elk would Tom Jones the engine must our head, the dining car our oesophagus, the guard’s van our left lung, the cattle truck our shins, the first-class compartment the piece of skin at the nape of the neck and the level crossing an electric elk called Simon. The clarity. But where the ambiguity? It over there in a box. Shunt the 8.15 from Gillingham when in reality he the 8.13 from Gillingham. The train the same only the time altered. Ecce homo, ergo elk. La Fontaine his sister and her bloody well. The point taken, the beast moulting, the fluff up your nose. The illusion complete; it reality, the reality illusion and the ambiguity the only truth. But the truth, as Hitchcock observes, in the box? No there not room, the ambiguity on weight. The point, the elk dead, the beast at Swindon, Chabrol at nothing, I treatment and La Fontaine can. > > The point crystal clear, bouncy bouncy. I don’t a word of what you. Actually, that. I every word, but the whole paragraph not sense. Are you to a point? ---
**Author:** ![scamartistry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/919ad9/32.png) [@scamartistry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scamartistry)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/32 "2011-04-30T07:13:29Z")
(nb this was clearly meant as somewhat of a joke…) ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/33 "2011-04-30T08:12:45Z")
Damn! I thought I was finally going to get noticed. I make bad jokes all the time. I hate these popularity threads. It’s high school all over again. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 9:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/34 "2011-04-30T09:00:43Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > Damn! I thought I was finally going to get noticed. I make bad jokes all the time. > > I hate these popularity threads. It’s high school all over again. Do you best in your pit thread. Bring colanders!!! ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 9:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/35 "2011-04-30T09:07:22Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Joke threads aren’t allowed in the Pit. Say what? Lynn used to say joke thread had to be in the pit. Or does that only apply to parodies? BTW, I took it as “Let’s pit the people who make bad jokes.” Not exactly serious, in that they don’t deserve to be pitted, but serious in the fact that the joke is dumb and they should be ashamed of themselves for making it. I’d win in spades, except I don’t think people always realize that I’m even trying to make a joke… ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/36 "2011-04-30T14:27:17Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > Cool! We get to do this now? All right, then: I declare that verbs are no longer allowed! I accidentally too many jokes! ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/37 "2011-04-30T15:03:24Z")
You know who else didn’t like jokes and puns? > [@Wile\_E](#): > > Damn! I thought I was finally going to get noticed. I make bad jokes all the time. > > I hate these popularity threads. It’s high school all over again. Don’t forget that life is just like HS. The only difference is that it’s not over in 4 years. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/38 "2011-04-30T15:54:44Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Say what? Lynn used to say joke thread had to be in the pit. Or does that only apply to parodies? You’re thinking of parodies, in particular, parodies that are specifically intended to mock another poster’s thread or posting style. Joke threads, such as “I Pit **John Mace** for being so cool!” or threads that are literally a collection of jokes (as this was apparently intended to be) should go in MPSIMS. Which is where I’m moving this now. Play nice, everyone: you’re not in the Pit anymore. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/39 "2011-04-30T19:36:48Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > Do you best in your pit thread. Bring colanders!!! Thanks for trying. I guess I’ll just have to try to be even more annoying if I want my own genuine pit thread. By the way. I’m not a “he”. ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240/40 "2011-04-30T21:11:10Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Huh. This thread presents a bit of a dilemma for me. Initially, I read it as a humorous way of collecting good jokes from other Pit threads in one place. However, it’s also possible that the OP is serious, and is genuinely pitting people for making jokes in Pit threads. Point of order - the original joke was in a GD thread [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=606361&highlight=Canada&page=2](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=606361&highlight=Canada&page=2) not a Pit thread. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/goround-zero-of-jokes/580240.md?page=3)