# GrahamWellington vs. Left Hand of Dorkness **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 10, 2005, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623 "2005-10-10T20:25:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![hopesperson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e95f7d/32.png) [@hopesperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hopesperson)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/41 "2005-10-10T23:42:02Z")
> [@GrahamWellington](#): > > Sure, close it now just because you know the tide is about to turn my way! I was lurking as the original thread unfolded and I’ve been watching this one, too. Mostly I’ve just been feeling sorry for **Graham** because he seemed to have gotten in over his head and frankly he does seem to be delusional, what with the mission from God stuff. But if he seriously thinks the tide is about to turn his way, well that’s downright frightening. If not, well, 😕. Either way, there doesn’t appear to be much more to be gained by continuing a dialogue with him. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/42 "2005-10-10T23:43:56Z")
> [@Contrapuntal](#): > > _Hijack_– **Lefty** > Thanks for the Pinker reference. You have given me a great deal to think about, I have pretty much come around to your way of thinking, with a few quibbles.–_Hijack._ -Continuing hijack: you’re welcome, and I’m really glad you got a chance to read it! Great stuff, huh? Sometime we gotta talk about the quibbles.[/hijack] Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/43 "2005-10-10T23:45:01Z")
> [@Scott Plaid](#): > > Well, actually, it seems to be 27-1, since **wring** seems to have voted in post 9, but still, yeah, what you said rings true. You saw that as a vote for **Graham**? Recalibrate the irony meter there Skippy. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/44 "2005-10-10T23:45:04Z")
> [@Scott Plaid](#): > > Well, actually, it seems to be 27-1, since **wring** seems to have voted in post 9, but still, yeah, what you said rings true. That was sarcasm, **scott**. ---
**Author:** ![GrahamWellington](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/54ee81/32.png) [@GrahamWellington](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrahamWellington)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/45 "2005-10-10T23:46:11Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > Actually, by my count, **Graham** , the tally would by 28-0 in favor of your needing to take up your agreement to receive three sessions of therapy. There is no conceivable way that I could end up obligated to fulfill your request at this point, by the original terms: since we agreed to evaluate the thread at 40 posts and determine who’d been supported by the majority, my obligation to you is a mathematical impossibility. > > Daniel If the Mods close the thread at your request, then that’s tantamount to your reneging on the deal, sir. And you’ll have to FOLLOW MY INSTRUCIONS TO THE LETTER. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/46 "2005-10-10T23:49:30Z")
> [@GrahamWellington](#): > > If the Mods close the thread at your request, then that’s tantamount to your reneging on the deal, sir. And you’ll have to FOLLOW MY INSTRUCIONS TO THE LETTER. **Graham.** It is 28-0. If the next 12 posters support you you still lose. The bet is over. Do you understand? ---
**Author:** ![hopesperson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e95f7d/32.png) [@hopesperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hopesperson)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/47 "2005-10-10T23:50:03Z")
Oh, and by way of getting it over with, here’s another vote for **LHoD**. ---
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/48 "2005-10-10T23:50:04Z")
> [@GrahamWellington](#): > > If the Mods close the thread at your request, then that’s tantamount to your reneging on the deal, sir. And you’ll have to FOLLOW MY INSTRUCIONS TO THE LETTER. Graham, tell us straight-out: are you fucking with us, or are you really crazy? It’s OK if you’re fucking with us, and it’s OK if you’re crazy, but I wanna be in on it if you’re fucking with us. Just cast a wink my way if you’re fucking with us, OK? ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/49 "2005-10-10T23:50:10Z")
_sigh_… **Graham** , that was not an attempt on Daniel’s part to welch out. It was a generous offer to allow you to save face. You are doing yourself no favors. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/50 "2005-10-10T23:51:04Z")
> [@GrahamWellington](#): > > If the Mods close the thread at your request, then that’s tantamount to your reneging on the deal, sir. And you’ll have to FOLLOW MY INSTRUCIONS TO THE LETTER. Even if that were true, I carefully did not request that the thread be closed, because I did not want to offer even the appearance of reneging on the deal. I brought it to their attention so that they could make the decision. If a Mod decides to close this thread, I’d actually appreciate it if they could cut-and-paste my report into the thread prior to closure, so that everything can be transparent. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/51 "2005-10-10T23:53:11Z")
I should make it clear that if you ARE crazy, please take your medication or whatever. I mean, I have very good friends who are schizo and delusional and I understand it’s an illness and I don’t blame or cast judgment. I just want you to be better. ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/52 "2005-10-10T23:55:35Z")
I know it’s wrong, but I can’t help but be entertained by such episodes. Delusion is just so damn fascinating. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2005, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/53 "2005-10-10T23:57:11Z")
I vote for Graham. Because I like his crackers. And he gets double points because I like his beef too. However, crackers and beef together may be troubling. Oh for the halicon days of Iron Chef threads. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2005, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/54 "2005-10-11T00:00:25Z")
Another vote for **LHoD**. **Graham** lost me at the connection between Carlos Castaneda and satanic ritual abuse. ---
**Author:** ![Epimetheus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c4cdca/32.png) [@Epimetheus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Epimetheus)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2005, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/55 "2005-10-11T00:04:04Z")
Didn’t add my vote: LHOD of course. Gotta go with reason and logic, rather than illogic and lunacy. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2005, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/56 "2005-10-11T00:13:15Z")
> [@GrahamWellington](#): > > If the Mods close the thread at your request, then that’s tantamount to your reneging on the deal, sir. And you’ll have to FOLLOW MY INSTRUCIONS TO THE LETTER. Well, now it looks like it’s over forty. Give? ---
**Author:** ![duality72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duality72/32/3910_2.png) [@duality72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duality72)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2005, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/57 "2005-10-11T00:13:31Z")
Another vote for LHoD. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2005, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/58 "2005-10-11T00:24:46Z")
**Graham Wellington** , I am someone who disagrees with **LHoD** on practically every subject except (IIRC) the First Amendment. But his arguments in this case are persuasive, and yours are not. I would also recommend, in all seriousness, that you not spend much of your Straight Dope time in the Pit. The things that are going to be said to you here are not going to be good for anybody. I don’t want to offend or insult you. I have done so in the past to people in your position, and I generally regretted it later. I am **really** hoping this doesn’t end badly for you. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![GrahamWellington](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/54ee81/32.png) [@GrahamWellington](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrahamWellington)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2005, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/59 "2005-10-11T00:25:25Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Well, now it looks like it’s over forty. Give? No. I want the full three days. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2005, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623/60 "2005-10-11T00:25:44Z")
For the record, I don’t think **Graham Wellington** is mentally ill at all. I fear the rules forbid me from saying more. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grahamwellington-vs-left-hand-of-dorkness/325623.md?page=4)