# Great BIg Gobs **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 27, 2000, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518 "2000-10-27T00:21:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/1 "2000-10-27T00:21:30Z")
My SO and I had a debate - he’s from the Wash. DC area, I’m from Mid MI. we both remember this song: "Great Big Gobs of Greasy Grimey Gopher Guts, Mutilated Monkey Meat * * * French Fried Eyeball Swimmin In a pool of blood and I forgot my spoon!" Now, he remembers (obviously wrong) the 3rd line to be " Petrified Porpoise Pus" while I remember (obviously right) “concentrated Birdies Feet” (which scans better, I must point out). Now, I’m willing to consider that there may be regional differences here. So, Please: What’s the 3rd line (and where are ya from?) ---
**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/2 "2000-10-27T00:47:14Z")
Lived in Cincinnati, OH at that age. The line I learned was “Little dirty birdy feet.” A record of kids songs I had at the time said “Itty bitty birdy feet” and repeated “Great big gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts” instead of “French fried eyeballs sitting in a bowl of blood.” Cleaned up for the parents, I suppose. ---
**Author:** ![Philbuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9a140/32.png) [@Philbuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philbuck)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/3 "2000-10-27T01:05:10Z")
The version I recall (west Texas) both adds a little more alliteration and takes the rhyming even further… Great green gobs of greasy grimey gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat Chopped up parakeet French fried eyeballs rolling down the muddy street And I forgot my spoon (but I’ve got a straw…) Personally, I think the 5-syllable third line (“chopped…up…parakeet” with quick delivery of the first two words followed by a pause after each) is better than another 7-syllable line, adding a little more variety. ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/4 "2000-10-27T01:22:18Z")
The version I heard is… Great big globs of greasy grimy gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat Little dirty birdie feet All these things are very very good to eat That’s what we had for lunch For supper… Scab sandwiches with pus on top Monkey vomit and camel snot Eagle eyeballs drenched in blood And for dessert we had some mud ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/5 "2000-10-27T01:23:06Z")
Great big globs of greasy grimey gopher guts mutilated monkey meat dirty little bridy feet deep fried eyeballs melting in a bowl of puss… and I forgot my spoon! (so I’ll use a straw-slurp) ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/6 "2000-10-27T01:49:04Z")
I always heard “Ground-up baby parakeet”. ---
**Author:** ![nineiron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e56c9b/32.png) [@nineiron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nineiron)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/7 "2000-10-27T02:20:32Z")
Our version was: Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts Mutilated monkey’s feet Dehydrated birdies beaks All mixed up with all-purpose porpoise pus Drowning in pink lemonade. (Gimme a straw!) The first time I heard another version, I thought it was hilarious, and the other person got a big kick out of our version too. ---
**Author:** ![Chickenhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7cd45c/32.png) [@Chickenhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chickenhead)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/8 "2000-10-27T02:38:22Z")
umm, excuse me, the official version is Great green globs of greasy, grimy gopher guts Marmalade monkey meat Chicken’s little dirty feet Twelve pink pounds of petrified pelican puke And I forgot my spoon. (But I brought a straw! SLURP) if by the official you mean my ---
**Author:** ![andyman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@andyman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andyman)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/9 "2000-10-27T19:33:40Z")
Our version down in South Louisiana Great green gobs of greasy grimey gopher guts, Mutilated monkey feet, Chopped up parakeet, French-fried eyeballs **rolling down the avenue** and I forgot my spoon! (Aw, shucks) ---
**Author:** ![AzRaek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/azraek/32/16739_2.png) [@AzRaek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AzRaek)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/10 "2000-10-27T19:44:56Z")
Great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat (OR “mutilated Murphy meat”, he was an evil jerk of a teacher) Chopped up baby parakeet Great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts And I forgot my spoon Alliteration and imagery at their highest forms. ---
**Author:** ![c\_goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@c\_goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/c_goat)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/11 "2000-10-27T19:59:07Z")
I heard Philbuck’s version but with slight changes: Chopped up **baby** parakeet and …rolling down the **dirty** street. Gotta wonder who made these things up. Some of those children’s rhymes are pretty bad. ---
**Author:** ![Sn-man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Sn-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sn-man)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/12 "2000-10-27T20:03:52Z")
We learned it as: Great big globs of greasy grimy gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat Little tiny birdie butts All these things are good to eat and I forgot my spoon, so I’ll use a straw! I guess boys will be boys and even back then we wanted a “little ass” when with a chick. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![c\_goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@c\_goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/c_goat)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/13 "2000-10-27T20:04:14Z")
And there was a second verse I learned… So they gave me scab sandwiches with puss on top Monkey vomit and camel snot All these things are very very good to eat And nutritous too… That’s whacked ---
**Author:** ![Brynda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Brynda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brynda)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/14 "2000-10-28T06:30:43Z")
I grew up in Tennessee and learned a different version. The ending I learned was very different, but I can’t remember the whole thing. It was something like: Great, green globs of greasy, grimy, gopher guts, Mutilated monkey meat, Little piggies’ hairy feet. All wrapped up in \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ Mixed in a barrel of blood. Anyone know this version? The missing words are bugging me. ---
**Author:** ![Olentzero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/90ced4/32.png) [@Olentzero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Olentzero)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/15 "2000-10-28T13:29:28Z")
As I remember it, it went a little something like this: _Great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat Putrefacted piggy feet Eighteen eyeballs rollin’ up and down the street **(alt: French Fried eyeballs - goodness what a tasty treat)** And I forgot my spoon…_ Don’t remember any second verse, though. And while we’re at it: _Eddie spaghetti with the meatball eyes Pop him in the oven and ya got - French fries!_ ---
**Author:** ![AndYrAStar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8edcca/32.png) [@AndYrAStar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AndYrAStar)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/16 "2000-10-28T16:29:21Z")
…ewww ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/17 "2000-10-28T16:43:29Z")
Y-camp version (sung by us boys): “Girls are made of green gushy gopher guts, Chopped up monkey meat, French-fried parakeet, Lettuce, And dogshit soup.” I like how we equated “lettuce” with all those other icky things. To this day I still hate vegetables. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![lolagranola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ea5d25/32.png) [@lolagranola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lolagranola)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/18 "2000-10-28T17:44:04Z")
Back in Lacombe, Alberta, we sang it as: Great green globs of greasy grimy gopher gut Mutilated monkey meat Little dirty birdy feet Great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts And I forgot my spoon But there’s a straw… ---
**Author:** ![Doug\_K](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5ac83/32.png) [@Doug\_K](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doug_K)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/19 "2000-10-28T19:47:44Z")
Since this is a folk song, it is natural for there to be many variations on the lyrics. However, the song does have a Key Line, a Key Line being the one mandatory line that is the whole stinking point of the song–without which the song makes little or no sense. In the case of the McDonald’s parodies, it is, of course “McDonald’s is your kind of place”. In the Battle Hymn school parodies it is “Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school.” In this case no one has yet remembered the key line of the song, although Brynda came real close. The next to the last line absolutely positively has to be: “All mixed up in one big Jell-0.” It was common “knowledge” that Jell-o was made of disgusting leftover animal parts, and that those disgusting parts were what made it wiggle. In fact, the song was typically performed in the school cafeteria, and generally directed at people eating Jell-O in an attempt to _make them gag._ ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518/20 "2000-10-28T20:03:39Z")
The version I learned: Great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts Dehydrated monkey butts * * * Mushed up mounds of roadkill raccoon in a pail All in my sister’s soup (and she ATE it!) \*\*\* I forget this line. It was something about turtle tails, originally, but for some reason my best friend and I turned it into “Jeremy [last name deleted for his privacy]'s nuts” back in 5th grade. So mature. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-big-gobs/38518.md?page=2)