# great lines and quotes from people, bumper stickers and shirts **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 1, 2002, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208 "2002-04-01T15:33:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![igotit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/2acd7d/32.png) [@igotit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/igotit)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2002, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/21 "2002-04-02T18:14:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by H8\_2\_W8 \* > and her bumper sticker said: > > “Mean People Suck, but I Swallow” > > and that’s much better than the GratefulPhishhead types who just stop it at Mean People Suck. 😃 I have this bumper sticker, but it’s not on my car… it’s on my dresser mirror ---
**Author:** ![Capt.Spaulding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b5a626/32.png) [@Capt.Spaulding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt.Spaulding)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2002, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/22 "2002-04-02T19:00:04Z")
“Jesus may love you, but everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.” Which accurately sums up my opinion of those who feel the need to proclaim their religious beliefs. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2002, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/23 "2002-04-02T19:08:39Z")
“Of all the things that I have lost, I miss my mind the most.” It’s true, too… ---
**Author:** ![islandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8491ac/32.png) [@islandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/islandgirl)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2002, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/24 "2002-04-02T20:58:35Z")
On my favorite tee-shirt with a picture of Santa caught placing gifts under the tree by a little boy, “I’m sorry you saw me Billy. Now I have to kill you.” ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/25 "2002-04-03T06:11:18Z")
My all time favorite button includes a visual, so it’s hard to get the full impact… it’s a picture of Gumby with a long walking stick, dressed in a simple white tunic-y thing, and the text reads: “Mahatma Gumbhi, Man of Peace.” Cracks me up every time I look at it. ---
**Author:** ![Big\_Kahuna\_Burger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Big\_Kahuna\_Burger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Big_Kahuna_Burger)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/26 "2002-04-03T06:17:02Z")
On my car before I wrecked it: If you can read this then you’re not the president Others: My karma ran over your dogma Evolution: 50 million amphibians can’t be wrong ---
**Author:** ![Trillian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trillian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trillian)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/27 "2002-04-03T06:27:59Z")
Jesus is coming - spit or swallow ---
**Author:** ![robinh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b77776/32.png) [@robinh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robinh)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/28 "2002-04-03T15:10:22Z")
A button I just ordered for a friend of mine: Difficult? I can make you _pray_ for difficult. ---
**Author:** ![Lockfist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/838e76/32.png) [@Lockfist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lockfist)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/29 "2002-04-03T16:38:30Z")
[**Chicago Police - HOMICIDE:**](http://www.twinzoftorment.net/seen/photofiles/clothes/homocideshirt.jpg) _Our day starts when yours ends_ (picture of a smoking gun barrel) _Come back to **DETROIT** , we missed you the first time !"_ “ **Bomb Technician**. \* If you see me running, try to keep up !”\* ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/30 "2002-04-03T16:41:47Z")
God was my co-pilot, but we crashed in the Andes and I had to eat him. My other car is a figment of my imagination. My other bumper sticker is much funnier. Honk if you love making irritating noises. My parents went to a planet where the dominant lifeforms have no bilateral symmetry, and all I got was this lousy F-shirt. Ask me about my vow of silence. Jesus saves, Allah forgives, Cthulhu thinks you’d make a nice sandwich. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. – Mark Twain If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex? – Art Hoppe I speak BASIC to clients, 1-2-3 to management, and mumble to myself. – Anonymous Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications. – Fran Lebowitz If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten. – George Carlin Gravity is the soul of wt. – John Langdon Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese. – G. K. Chesterton That was Zen. This is Tao. – Peter da Silva If you had only kept quiet, one would have gone on believing you were wise. [Si tecuisses, philosopus manisses.] – Boethius (c.480-524) Cats aren’t clean, they’re just covered with cat spit. – John S. Nichols Whatever else happens, we shall remain stupid. – Gustave Flaubert That’s probably enough… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![AbbySthrnAccent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@AbbySthrnAccent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AbbySthrnAccent)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/31 "2002-04-03T17:00:33Z")
"Hey buddy, pop the clutch between your brain and your mouth why dontcha? " - Dexter Fullbright to umm, I forgot who he was talking to. It wasn’t me though. ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Dave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/46a35a/32.png) [@Great\_Dave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Dave)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/32 "2002-04-03T18:26:44Z")
I have a few good t-shirts: I eat small people. (I’m 6’9", 300#) eschew obfuscation Baroque: when you’re out of Monet Do you have change for a paradigm? And, of course, the classic bumper sticker: visualize whirled peas ---
**Author:** ![Toaster52](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/50afbb/32.png) [@Toaster52](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toaster52)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/33 "2002-04-03T19:01:10Z")
…wonders where **igotit** lives…😉 ---
**Author:** ![Toaster52](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/50afbb/32.png) [@Toaster52](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toaster52)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/34 "2002-04-03T19:05:36Z")
…whoops…sorry… The average woman would rather have beauty than brains because the average man can see better than he can think ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/35 "2002-04-03T20:41:45Z")
Jesus may love you, but I think you’re garbage wrapped in skin. I’m a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class, especially since I rule - Randal from Clerks I don’t miss God, but I sure miss Santa Claus - Courtney Love How about a nice tall glass of ShutTheFuckUp? ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/36 "2002-04-03T20:51:31Z")
\*\*My Australian Cattle Dog is smarter than your Honor Student. \*\* ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/37 "2002-04-03T22:25:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Trillian \* > \*\*Jesus is coming - spit or swallow \*\* The one I saw was “Jesus is coming-stick out your tongue” ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2002, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208/38 "2002-04-03T23:01:12Z")
Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. Born again Pagan. I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe. [www.northernsun.com](http://www.northernsun.com) has a lot of these…it’s a little left leaning politically for me, but the pagan bumper stickers crack me up. I especially like “God is too big to fit in one religion” and “In the case of rapture can I have your car?” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-lines-and-quotes-from-people-bumper-stickers-and-shirts/101208.md?page=1)