# Great movie one-liners **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 23, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382 "2012-08-23T14:58:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/1 "2012-08-23T14:58:29Z")
Note that this is not a thread for movie quotes or great dialog. It is for one-liners that do not depend on characters, context, or setup. It is for lines that stand well on their own. “You’re happy. I hate that!” “I’ve got just two words for you. Shut the fuck up.” “The problem may have been that there was a Stonehenge monument on the stage that was in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.” ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/2 "2012-08-23T15:03:22Z")
You should not drink and bake. Go ahead. Make My Day. You remind me of myself about twenty years from now. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/3 "2012-08-23T15:03:31Z")
“They’re from New Jersey, Phil, they’ve seen butts before.” ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Doom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Dr\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Doom)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/4 "2012-08-23T15:05:27Z")
“I don’t know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/5 "2012-08-23T15:13:04Z")
“If you guys were the inventors of Facebook, you’d have invented Facebook.” ---
**Author:** ![Rollo\_Tomasi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/58956e/32.png) [@Rollo\_Tomasi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rollo_Tomasi)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/6 "2012-08-23T16:40:18Z")
If I’d grown up on a farm and was retarded, then Bruges might impress me, but I didn’t, so it doesn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Labdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Labdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labdad)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/7 "2012-08-23T18:43:16Z")
Danny DeVito to Gene Hackman in _Heist_: “Don’t you want to hear my last words?” Hackman: “I just did!” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/8 "2012-08-23T18:56:36Z")
“And east is east and west is west, and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does.” ---
**Author:** ![Wargamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Wargamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wargamer)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/9 "2012-08-23T18:57:56Z")
‘Dying ain’t much of a living, boy.’ ---
**Author:** ![Whiteknight](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whiteknight/32/4962_2.png) [@Whiteknight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whiteknight)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/10 "2012-08-23T18:58:04Z")
“See you at the party, Richter!” ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/11 "2012-08-23T21:35:34Z")
“Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.” ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/12 "2012-08-23T23:57:47Z")
“What in the wide, wide world of sports is a-goin’ on here?” “Don’t judge me, monkey.” ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/13 "2012-08-24T00:22:08Z")
“Hey, Eddie! Dabbling in watercolors?” “Is that a rabbit in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?” “Everybody shut up for a minute! I gotta go take a piss and I don’t wanna miss nothin’!” “It occurs to me that this would be a wonderful way to get children to drink their milk!” ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/14 "2012-08-24T00:25:48Z")
Ah, to be young and insane! ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/15 "2012-08-24T00:29:31Z")
“Life is like a brand new suit of clothes, If it don’t fit right, _make alterations._” ---
**Author:** ![phxjcc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8491ac/32.png) [@phxjcc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phxjcc)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/16 "2012-08-24T00:56:16Z")
“Carol the waitress, Simon the fag.” ---
**Author:** ![Crawlspace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Crawlspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crawlspace)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/17 "2012-08-24T00:57:27Z")
“No, we’re not homosexual, but we are willing to learn.” “Do you like apples? Well I got her number, how do you like them apples?” “There’s so much time and so little to do. . . strike that, reverse it.” “Learn it. Know it. Live it.” “As long as there’s sex and drugs, I could do without the rock and roll.” “We’re on a mission from god.” ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/18 "2012-08-24T01:36:25Z")
Do not attempt to grow a brain. ---
**Author:** ![goonhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ebca7d/32.png) [@goonhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/goonhead)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/19 "2012-08-24T01:41:30Z")
“It’s such a fine line between clever and stupid” ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382/20 "2012-08-24T03:03:19Z")
“The moment things don’t go your way, you all start acting like a bunch of poncey hairdressers!” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-movie-one-liners/632382.md?page=2)