# Great Pathetic Songs.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [May 12, 2005, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487 "2005-05-12T00:54:23Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/1 "2005-05-12T00:54:23Z")
I was listening to The Temps’ Just My Imagination and I thought that this guy has to be the most pathetic guy ever. Every night he prays that some girl who doesn’t even know he exists doesn’t leave this imaginary marriage. Just sad.
Even sadder is Jennifer Holliday in And I Am Telling You. Jesus, he doesn’t want you woman, let it go! And what could be sadder and more pathetic than poor Otis Sitting On The Dock Of The Bay? Amy Lee, that’s who. She’s so low and down she’d just as soon fall out a window than put some shoes on and stand up.
What other great pathetic songs are out there?
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### Author:  [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/2 "2005-05-12T03:48:57Z")
MacArthur’s Park is melting
In the rain
I don’t think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I’ll never have that recipe
Again
Oh no
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### Author:  [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/3 "2005-05-12T05:00:08Z")
What about “Jenny”? The guy is trying to call a number he found on a bathroom stall, but he can’t even do it.
> [@](#):
>
> Jenny Jenny you’re the girl for me
> You don’t know me but you make me so happy
> I tried to call you before but I lost my nerve
> I tried my imagination but I was disturbed
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### Author:  [@Dr.Kenneth\_Noisewater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Kenneth_Noisewater)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/4 "2005-05-12T05:09:59Z")
Weezer - Only in Dreams
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### Author:  [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/5 "2005-05-12T05:28:02Z")
Any of Tammy Wynett’s early stuff.
You can replace the lyrics with;
“Please walk all over me. I’m a doormat!”
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### Author:  [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/6 "2005-05-12T05:30:53Z")
**Biggirl.** HEY. Where were you yesterday when I needed help to identify a Earth Wind and Fire song? Y-you let me down, girl. _sniffle!_
Mary J. Blige’s “I’m Going Down.” I used to hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate this fucking song in college. You want to throw a wet blanket on a party or a club and get all the women waving their hands in the air, swaying, in a “we hate all lying cheating men with dicks… and right now, that includes you too” mood? Play this shit. Grrr. I hate to be crude, but I’m still mad about the pussy I missed out that night. I’m still looking for the fucking DJ, too.
Ben E. King’s - I (Who Have Nothing) Is the kind of gloriously pitiful song about a broke guy who loves a girl he can never have whose boyfriend can afford to wine and dine her but doesn’t appreciate her. You absolutely can’t beat the production values or the singing. This used to be my old school get-over song when I was broke and dating.
Lenny Williams - Cuz I Love You. There’s this segment in the middle where Lenny is rapping about being so distraught about calling this woman who won’t return his calls and going over to her house where she won’t answer the door that he goes home to watch television until television went off. LOL. Thats old school blues.
My all-time favorite Great Pathetic Song singer, hands down, is Percy Sledge. “Take Time To Know Her” – everyone he knows tries to warn him not to marry the women he’s about to marry. And the narrator of “When A Man Loves a Woman,” is just sad. My old man once lent me his Percy Sledge Greatest Hits CD with the warning: “Percy ain’t never had a stable relationship in his entire life.”
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### Author:  [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 8:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/7 "2005-05-12T08:21:10Z")
**askia**
Good choice for “I Who Have Nothing”.
Ever hear the version of **“I Who Have Nothing” by Terry Knight and the Pack**? It is _really_ emotional (some might even consider it a bit overboard). (Tom Jones’ anemic version of that song that comes nowhere near the Ben E King or Terry Knight performances.)
My own nomination is **“Found Out About You” by the Gin Blossoms"**.
The guy learns that his ex-girlfriend is really not as virtuous as she pretended to be.
“The love I thought I won, you give for free”
“Your boyfriend’s over, I watch your light go out”
It’s a great song even though the lyrics are almost “Junior High School” in nature.
“Whispers at the bus stop, found out about nights out in the school yard, found out about you”. Still, this makes the song all the more appealing by making you think of similar situations in your own youth. Perhaps it’s a ‘coming of age’ song.
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### Author:  [@mamboman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mamboman)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/8 "2005-05-12T11:07:10Z")
“Is That All There Is?” by Peggy Lee. Words fail me. Also, for the bloodthristily upbeat, “Artificial Flowers” by Bobby Darin. Pathetic crossing into melodramatic.
mm
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### Author:  [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/9 "2005-05-12T11:24:39Z")
The Chi-Lites’ “Have You Seen Her?”
Poor slob lost his women and now sits in the park watching the children play.
Sorry, man, she ain’t coming back.
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### Author:  [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/10 "2005-05-12T11:26:38Z")
_Alone Again Naturally_ by **Gilbert O’Sullivan**
and just about any pre-disco **Bee Gees** song.
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### Author:  [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/11 "2005-05-12T12:54:40Z")
Oh, there are many pathetic songs that aren’t great-- Alone Again, Naturally is one of them. Also Clarence Carter’s Patches. What an effed up piece of crap his father was. Patches should have run away with the circus-- it would have been better for him.
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### Author:  [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/12 "2005-05-12T13:05:31Z")
A few Weezer songs: the aforementioned “Only In Dreams,” plus “Across the Sea,” “In My Garage,” “Pink Triangle,” and “El Scorcho” could all qualify.
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/13 "2005-05-12T13:09:19Z")
Hank Williams “I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry.” Man, it doesn’t get any more pathetic than that one.
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### Author:  [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/14 "2005-05-12T13:10:18Z")
Oh and the king of great pathetic loser songs if only for the chorus ( I don’t know what he’s going on about in the verses) has got to be Beck’s Loser.
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### Author:  [@Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stark_Raven_Mad)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/15 "2005-05-12T13:14:00Z")
_Something I can Never Have_ by the Nine Inch Nails is pretty pathetic, but IMO nothing beats _Iris_ by the Goo Goo Dolls. I still like the song, though.
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### Author:  [@Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rube_E.Tewesday)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/16 "2005-05-12T13:30:34Z")
Ever hear _Miss Emily’s Picture_ ? Nobody could be more pathetic than the narrator of that song.
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### Author:  [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/17 "2005-05-12T13:49:59Z")
What about “Operator” by Jim Croce?
Dude.
Your woman ran off with your best friend, and here you are in a phone booth, telling the poor phone-company worker all about it, and she finally hooks you up with some digits so you can lie to your ex (EX!!)-woman about how OK you are with all of it, and then, you can’t even go through with it.
So you got a good swift kick in the heart and you had to PAY a dime to do it. Poor bastard.
Or perhaps “I Don’t Have Anything” by VAST?
Oh, you poor slob. That’s all I’ve got.
This does not, of course prevent me from playing both songs when I’m drinking tequila straight from the bottle. Oh no. ☹
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/18 "2005-05-12T14:06:15Z")
Since First I Saw Your Face
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### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/19 "2005-05-12T14:46:53Z")
I have a really creepy c1900 recording of “My Sweetheart’s the Man in the Moon.” I picture the singer dressed up like Ophelia from _Hamlet_:
> [@](#):
>
> My sweetheart’s the man in the moon
> I’m going to marry him soon
> 'Twould fill me with bliss just to give him one kiss
> But I know that a dozen I never would miss
> I’ll go up in a great big balloon
> And see my sweetheart in the moon
> Then behind some dark cloud, where no one is allowed,
> I’ll make love to the man in the moon.
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### Author:  [@Psycho\_Pirate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psycho_Pirate)
#### Post date: [May 12, 2005, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/great-pathetic-songs/303487/20 "2005-05-12T18:28:02Z")
My vote is for _Don’t Cry Out Loud_
> [@](#):
>
> Don’t cry out loud
> Just keep it inside, learn how to hide your feelings
> Fly high and proud
> And if you should fall, remember you almost had it all
Life ain’t going your way? Don’t burden anybody with your problems. Instead, hide the pain you are feeling and live your miserable life to the fullest by taking chances at happiness you know you can’t have. And if you fail in your attempt to improve your meaningless existence, well, at least you were almost happy, and that’s better than nothing, right?
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