# greatest one liners from a movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 13, 2004, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003 "2004-02-13T06:03:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![eburacum45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eburacum45/32/8690_2.png) [@eburacum45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eburacum45)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/21 "2004-02-13T14:29:59Z")
You’re gonna need a bigger boat -_Jaws_ ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/22 "2004-02-13T14:36:56Z")
Phil: Morons. Your bus is leaving. ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/23 "2004-02-13T14:44:47Z")
Mr. Blonde: Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite? ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/24 "2004-02-13T14:54:40Z")
Holden: I’m not saying that I don’t think that a Bluntman and Chronic film isn’t the worst idea since Greedo shot first. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/25 "2004-02-13T14:57:02Z")
> [@lonelocust](#): > > **detop** > > I think Kilmer’s actual line was “I was just thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said: I drank what?.” Do’h ! you are of course right ☹ I guess its time for me to watch the movie again. Guess what’s on my schedule this weekend ? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MeanJoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanjoe/32/5693_2.png) [@MeanJoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanJoe)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/26 "2004-02-13T15:13:53Z")
“Game over, man! Game over!” “Why don’t you put her in charge!” - Aliens “I’m your huckleberry.” - Tombstone Everything from the first 45 minutes of Full Metal Jacket ---
**Author:** ![Labdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Labdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labdad)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/27 "2004-02-13T16:03:12Z")
“Of course I’m respectable. I’m old. Politicians, ugly buildings, and whores all get respectable if they last long enough.” Noah Cross (John Huston) in _ **Chinatown** _. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/28 "2004-02-13T16:04:46Z")
Just about every single line [here](http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0114814/quotes). BTW, great choice in the OP, **grisham**. When it comes to crude comedies, I don’t think I’ve ever heard a line that made me laugh more. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/29 "2004-02-13T18:22:53Z")
> [@elf6c](#): > > Phil: Morons. Your bus is leaving. That is one of my top 10 movies and I’ve seen it dozens of times but I can’t remember the scene. Refresh my memory? ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/30 "2004-02-13T18:27:14Z")
In _Fandango_ when Judd Nelson, laying on the ground with a failed rip cord clenched in his fist and sure he just augered into the earth looks up at the laundry descending all around him that was accidentally substituted for his parachute and says\* “Aaaangels!”\* ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/31 "2004-02-13T18:32:54Z")
I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley. – Airplane ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/32 "2004-02-13T18:44:12Z")
“I thought I was dead for a while too…but it turned out I was just in Nebraska.”–Little Bill from Unforgiven after the “Duke of Death” said he thought Little Bill was dead. Particularly funny since I first saw the movie with a girl from Nebraska. ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/33 "2004-02-13T18:52:25Z")
In Blake Edwards’ **S.O.B** , Julie Andrews refers to Robert Preston as a shyster. Deeply offended, he replies, “Madam! A \* shyster\* is a crooked lawyer! _I_ am a quack! ---
**Author:** ![CadburyAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c2a13f/32.png) [@CadburyAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CadburyAngel)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/34 "2004-02-13T19:07:59Z")
From the movie Snatch: Turkish (making tea): Would you like sugar? Brick Top: No thanks, Turkish. I’m sweet enough. It is bizarre and hilarious in context of this character’s behavior through the rest of the film. Brick Top: Do you know what “nemesis” means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an 'orrible cunt… me. ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/35 "2004-02-13T19:08:15Z")
In _They Live_ Rowdy Roddy Piper’s character is being chased by the police. He is wearing a pair of special sunglasses that allows him to see the aliens that are infiltrating the Earth for what they really are, even though they’re disguised as humans. He runs into a bank, carrying a shotgun and wearing a pistol. He stops, panting, in the lobby. He’s disheveled, out of breath, and tired. He looks around, and sees many aliens scattered throughout the bank, disguised as both customers and bank personnel. Everyone has stopped and is staring at this madman who just burst in off the street. He gathers himself, brings the shotgun to bear, and says: “I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick some ass.” Brief pause. “And I’m all out of bubble gum.” And then he starts shooting. Classic line. Classic scene. ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/36 "2004-02-13T19:25:46Z")
_Top Gun_: Tom Cruise’s character’s commanding officer, after informing Cruise that he is being sent to the Top Gun flight school: “And if you screw this one up, I’ll have you flying a cargo plane full of rubber dog shit out of Hong Kong!” ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/37 "2004-02-13T19:59:16Z")
> [@Bruce\_Daddy](#): > > That is one of my top 10 movies and I’ve seen it dozens of times but I can’t remember the scene. Refresh my memory? It was earlier in the movie in the Cafe I believe. He says it to the guys he later goes driving with while they are drunk. ---
**Author:** ![Big\_Norse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/big_norse/32/9954_2.png) [@Big\_Norse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Big_Norse)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/38 "2004-02-13T20:04:13Z")
From Buckaroo Banzai: Penny: Buckaroo, you forgot your thruster. BB: Why don’t you just hold onto it for a while. Or any of a hundred others from that movie. ---
**Author:** ![MeanJoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanjoe/32/5693_2.png) [@MeanJoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanJoe)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/39 "2004-02-13T20:14:53Z")
“Listen up you primitive zipper-heads…” “This is my BOOM stick!” “Gimme some sugar baby.” Ash, Evil Dead III ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2004, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003/40 "2004-02-13T20:50:47Z")
[ul][li]Pardon me, but your husband is showing. [/li] [li]If I’d been a ranch, they would have named me The Bar None.[/li] [li]Statistics show that there are more women in the world than anything else. Except insects. [/ul][/li] All from Charles Vidor’s _Gilda,_ a film that outcasablancas _Casablanca_. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greatest-one-liners-from-a-movie/229003.md?page=3)