# Greeting Cards you wish existed

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greeting-cards-you-wish-existed/142102>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [December 11, 2002, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greeting-cards-you-wish-existed/142102 "2002-12-11T21:43:16Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2002, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greeting-cards-you-wish-existed/142102/21 "2002-12-15T15:16:24Z")

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Here’s one I’ll need in June for my niece:

(outside)

[strike]Class of '02[/strike]  
Class of 03

(inside)

Sorry you won’t be graduating with your class!

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**Author:** ![Enright3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enright3/32/2897_2.png) [@Enright3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enright3)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2002, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greeting-cards-you-wish-existed/142102/22 "2002-12-15T18:09:54Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by avabeth \*  
> \*\*Outside:  
> Sorry to hear about the troubles in your marriage.  
> Inside:  
> Let me know when the divorce is finalized so I can throw a congratulatory party for your ex-husband.
> 
> Ava \*\*

How about  
Outside:  
Sorry to hear about the troubles in your marriage.  
Inside:  
But if you want to get back at your husband by screwing around, let me know!

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**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2002, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greeting-cards-you-wish-existed/142102/23 "2002-12-15T18:39:28Z")

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Once again, **Esprix** has come to my rescue. I think he posted that same site years ago, and I’ve been trying to find it ever since. Now it will be a Merry Christmas…for me. Not for the recipients. ::cue evil laugh::

I used to work at a radio station. We got lots of cards from record companies, some better than others. The lamest ones were boring drawings of Christmas trees with “Thanks for the spins, the gang at A & R…” etc. But the BEST one, in my opinion, was a black glossy card with a black matte Christmas tree on the front. Inside the words “Fuck You.” were in white exactly as I’ve typed them, with the period. It was brilliant. I’m not sure it would have flown in any business other than commerical radio (and it helped that it was a modern rock station, as opposed to…say…soft rock favorites or something,) I hung that card in the place of honor, dead center in the wall of cards. The GM was not nearly as amused as I was.

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**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2002, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greeting-cards-you-wish-existed/142102/24 "2002-12-15T20:23:01Z")

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I live to serve.

Esprix

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