Grocery Store Etiquette?

Gee. I guess you’ll just give me everything for free then, rather than having to go the the hell and anguish of dealing with money? I mean, it’s not like that’s your job or anything.

I’m takin’ up shoplifting.

Me too. As an un-tall person I often have to aske taller people for help getting items from the higher shelves and I try to help others who might also need help. But once I get in the queue, I want to get through the checkout and get home.

Have you considered a career change?

Hey, I’m just stating the generalities at work. Of course there’s some people who aren’t so bad, but you get used to jerks when in retail. That’s why I’m going to school, so I can get away from it.

Ooooh, I HATE that. I’m very hesitant using the Quick Check with a full load of groceries. I tell the cashier that I don’t like getting the dirty looks (I’d be staring daggers if it were me) and could they please call someone else up. If they can’t or won’t, I make certain any and all approaching with their single melty ice cream are aware that the cashier made me do it and they couldn’t/wouldn’t open another register. The blame in those situations lies entirely with the store, and I shouldn’t get dogged because they don’t have enough staff on duty.

OK, just this morning I bought some watermelon at Whole Foods for $3.02. I looked in my wallet and lo! there were three dollar bills and two pennies, which I gave to the cashier. Should I have handed her a twenty, rather than my “freakin’ change?” I’ve actually had cashiers thank me for my freakin’ change, because “everyone hands me twenties, so I never have any change in my drawer.”

I hope you’re never in a situation where change is all you have to buy food. Coinstar charges 9%, and rolling and going to the bank takes time and some banks won’t take anybody’s change but customers.

Unless someone is buying over $20 of groceries and paying only with change, I’d say “Give them a break.”

I think I know what Naz is talking about: I used to get people who would come through the line with a couple of items and want to pay with little baggies full of change. They’d usually have them seperated into dollar ammounts, but we were required to count them. (Ever count five dollars in pennies while a line-full of people glares at you?)

Coupons didn’t usually cause a problem, because most of them are bar-coded these days. What I hated was the ones who insisted I ought to accept an expired coupon, or a competitor’s store coupons when our policy forbid it.

One of my pet peves was people who were incredibly particular about the bagging process. (Oh, I despised paper bags!) I remember one woman who wanted everything bagged in plastic, neatly tucked into a paper bag, and then with another plastic bag on the outside for handles.

I was also irked by the “re-arrangers”. I am not an idiot. Packing a bag is a relatively simple matter, and I actually paid attention during the training for this. Never too heavy, cold items together, using boxed items as side supports . . . I wasn’t some moron who threw cans on top of the bread. But there were some people who would go down to the end of the belt and focus on re-bagging each item to their own satisfaction (and to tell you the truth, I never found their results to be as neat and effecient as my own.) So intent were they that when I announced their total, they did not abandon their task in order to pay. I’d have to wait until they finished, with the other customers eyeing me suspiciously, wondering how much I had fucked-up the bagging process that the customer had to do it themselves.

Uncontrolled children were another of my irritations. Mom would look on with benign approval while her Little Darling trashed the candy racks and rumpled all of the magazines which I would have to clean up as quickly as possible or have a roaming manager bark at me for having such a sloppy aisle. We had a mechanical riding horse for kids up at the front of the bank of registers. I used to carry pennies in my pocket and give them to the wild children with an invitation to go ride the horse.

I’ve seen several responses here about people who go through the express lane with a cartful of groceries. Oddly enough, I always run into the opposite problem. When I show up at the “regular” checkout line with my cartful of groceries, there always seems to be two or three people in line in front of me with just a couple of items. Why they don’t use the express lane or one of the self-check lines is beyond me.

That’s exactly what I mean by change. Thank you, Lissa.

I suppose I wouldn’t mind coupons so badly if not for the fact that our system at work doesn’t accept barcoded manufacturer’s coupons, so everything has to be entered manually. One or two is one thing, but it gets frustrating when there are a lot of them.

It could be worse. They could get behind you in the queue and then ask if they cana go before you because they have only a couple of items. That happens to me several times a week.

I paid cash for my groceries for the first time in ages the other day. I usually write a check for $50 over. I was all confused because they give the coin change from a little machine at the end of the check-out conveyor these days. They don’t count it out for you anymore. I was a “shopper in training”.

Yeah, and then your good manners kick in and make you feel guilty if you don’t let them go ahead of your cartful. Unless I’m in a really good mood, I’ll eye the express lane and mention it (esp if there’s no-one in that line). Fool people. I don’t like feeling like I should let that person go ahead when there’s a perfectly acceptable open lane just 10 feet away. Yet I do…

Because I’d rather wait behind one person with twenty items than 15 people with three items each.

Another reason I love the Safeway: the clerks are not above pointing out to people in the express lane with filled carts that they’re in … the express lane. Some people are genuinely surprised, other act sheepish, and others get pissed off.
But they always move to a regular lane.

Unfortunately, I believe the supermarkets have stopped training staff on packing bags (it would take precious time away from training them on ALWAYS CALLING THE CUSTOMER BY MANGLED NAME!). I routinely have to rescue my bread and bananas from being squashed and bruised.

Regarding the basket leavers, if you can make it back before the line moves, cool. If not, the line moves around you and tough noogies for you.

And cashiers routinely do the “call the next person in line” thing when opening new tills here, which I really appreciate. Of course, we’re a bunch of Canadians, so it’s a pretty polite process, anyway. (Anybody remember Mac ‘n’ Tosh? :smiley: )

God, I hated having to call the customer by name. I think it’s terribly rude. We also had to say, “Thank you for shopping at your [store], Mrs. Name.”

I once asked the manager about this idiotic emphasis on “your”, and she said it was because they wanted customers to feel it was their store. (My mental reaction was, “Great. Another boost to their sense of entitlement.”) Calling them by name was supposed to give them the sense that they had been recognized and might mistake themselves for being in a little hometown store instead of a giant, heartless corporate profit-machine.

All I ever saw it do was make people offended, especially if their last names were mispronounced. (Hooked on Phonics was no help here!)

The same thing happened to me as the OP a couple months ago. Someone had left their cart in the checkout lane to go get something. The person in front of them got done and they hadn’t returned yet. So the cashier motioned for me to come through with my stuff. I was about half finished checking out my stuff when the person returned. And had the nerve to glare at me and make a comment about me cutting! WTF? You left! If you leave and aren’t back by the time the person in front of you finishes, you lose your turn. That’s it. The rest of us do not have to wait for you to run all over the store. Sheesh.

I’ve been caught at Walmart by this. But I never bitch at the cashier. First I ask him/her where the express lane is, then what the item limit is, and finally why they’re checking out a huge order. I’m very polite when I do this (though I’ve gotten glares from big order lady). Then have a manager summoned and bitch at him/her.

20 dollars in change is at least 80 coins (coins larger than a quarter are seldom seen). I’ve had people try to pay with bags of pennies, nickels, and dimes as well as quarteres. All that change must be counted by the cashier before the order can finished; everbody behind must wait. Even worse is when people bring in roles of change since we can’t accept them. We have to take apart the role and count everything, getting glares and whining from other customers in the process. If you have that much change and can’t afford 9 cents on the dollar to get it counted go to a bank.