# Grr. I have to write a "diversity statement." I'm insulted. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 2, 2010, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266 "2010-07-02T03:21:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Gedd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gedd/32/4938_2.png) [@Gedd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gedd)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/21 "2010-07-02T19:05:30Z")
Be sure to mention how you started an inner city cricket league to keep kids off the streets and off drugs. Though the team you coached yourself had a diverse make up and there was a great amount of discontent at first, you overcame that barrier (which was done through lots of humorous one-liners and slap stick) just in time to have a turnaround and win the championship! ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/22 "2010-07-02T19:12:10Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > It may seem pointless and insulting to you, but you’d be surprised how many people write “In my last library we had a large Middle Eastern population, so we made sure to keep any books about terrorism or bomb making behind the counter. I support diversity but we should really make sure these kinds of people do not come to our country.” There are lots of people who can’t even pass basic tests of human decency and common sense. But that just IS common sense! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/23 "2010-07-02T19:21:16Z")
Ok folks time to fight some ignorance. I thought I was pretty updated on my racist slang but I must ask what is a: slopes zebras smufties gin monkeys Thank you for enlightening me. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/24 "2010-07-02T20:14:42Z")
> [@Tahssa](#): > > Ok folks time to fight some ignorance. > > I thought I was pretty updated on my racist slang but I must ask what is a: > > slopes > zebras > smufties > gin monkeys > > Thank you for enlightening me. Asian biracial (black and white…get it? HA! :rolleyes:) Don’t know the last two. Gin monkeys might be British, but I’m not sure. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/25 "2010-07-02T21:11:28Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > So, prejudiced against Canadians, eh? Figgers. Don’t worry. We also welcome Figgers. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/26 "2010-07-02T21:13:29Z")
> [@Captain\_Midnight](#): > > My diversity statement… > > This company accepts and desires all people from all different backgrounds to work together in harmony and diversity. > > We invite all crackers, niggers, chinks, spics, hebes, dotheads, slopes, greaseballs, guineas, micks, zebras, camel jockies and spear chuckers an equal opportunity to join hands together to make this the best company in the World. Diversity is our Strength! > > * * * > > You may copy this if you wish. And of course us fags get left out. I see how it is. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/27 "2010-07-02T21:45:28Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > And of course us fags get left out. I see how it is. Maybe you’re considered Canadian, and got left out with us. Hey, if I’m Canadian and American, can I be a zebra? Or am I just a horse of a different colour. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/28 "2010-07-02T21:52:11Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > In fact, if you believe this library has a particularly non-diverse clientele, you should point that out, and talk about making the library a major source of diversity to that community. Whatever you do, don’t do this. Employers don’t want employees that will make waves. They want people who will spout the official line and nothing but. The library thinks they’re diverse- going in and saying that you _don’t_ think they’re diverse is a good way to not get hired. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/29 "2010-07-02T21:57:40Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Whatever you do, don’t do this. Employers don’t want employees that will make waves. They want people who will spout the official line and nothing but. The library thinks they’re diverse- going in and saying that you _don’t_ think they’re diverse is a good way to not get hired. Concur. And whatever you do, don’t let an iota of your irritation show, either in the essay itself or in your demeanor. But of course, you already knew that. Good luck! I hope you get the position! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/30 "2010-07-02T22:01:40Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Whatever you do, don’t do this. Employers don’t want employees that will make waves. They want people who will spout the official line and nothing but. The library thinks they’re diverse- going in and saying that you _don’t_ think they’re diverse is a good way to not get hired. Third or fourth this. Jump through the hoop, write something straight out of a cringe-worthy What I Did On My Racially Diverse Summer Vacation essay, get the job and feel better. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/31 "2010-07-02T22:07:22Z")
> [@Cat\_Fight](#): > > Third or fourth this. Jump through the hoop, write something straight out of a cringe-worthy What I Did On My Racially Diverse Summer Vacation essay, get the job and feel better. “…and then Jim and I decided to raft down the Mississippi.” ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/32 "2010-07-02T22:31:53Z")
> [@Cat\_Fight](#): > > Third or fourth this. Jump through the hoop, write something straight out of a cringe-worthy What I Did On My Racially Diverse Summer Vacation essay, get the job and feel better. Yeah, that’s my plan. I have plenty of stuff to write about, I just hate doing it. I didn’t do those things because I wanted something to write fake-personal essays about, you know? And personal experience (starting inner-city cricket leagues) shouldn’t matter–my professional ethics should matter. Thanks, **purplehorseshoe**! The good news is that the job is pretty much mine, as long as I jump through these hoops. The future boss is ready to go–I just have to satisfy the HR department with all this junk. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266/33 "2010-07-02T22:35:56Z")
You forgot the the towelheads, the dotheads, the dagos, the goombahs, the wops, the wogs, the hunkies, the polacks, the hebes, the chigs, and the flips. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grr-i-have-to-write-a-diversity-statement-im-insulted/545266.md?page=1)