# Gruesome medical question (guys, you know what I'm talkin about) **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [December 1, 2000, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517 "2000-12-01T04:01:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Major\_Feelgud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3be4f8/32.png) [@Major\_Feelgud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Major_Feelgud)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/41 "2000-12-03T22:20:38Z")
There are some experiments everyone can try at home. 1. Go to the supermarket and push on a cow spleen. Squeeze your nuts a little. Do they feel comparable? Of course not. The spleen is a single consistency. If your nuts feel like a spleen, you should see your doctor immediately. 2. I would guess that a cow’s eyeball would be the closest you could get to a human testicle without having to raid your local morgue. Why don’t you buy a cow’s eyeball. Put it on your kitchen table and put that’s something 5lbs on it. Do you see now that 5lbs will not crush it? ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/42 "2000-12-03T23:17:25Z")
Okay, can we get serious for a minute? Against my will, my “ignorance-fighting” module has been engaged (“Bad Tupok! No biscuit!”) After eliminating the kinky sex websites, “Crush testicle” on Google brings up the following: [http://www.dailyemerald.com/archive/v99/1/970922/fight.html](http://www.dailyemerald.com/archive/v99/1/970922/fight.html) > [@](#): > > Women have the ability to repel attackers, Guse said. “Every woman can apply 40 pounds of pressure with one hand – merely four pounds are needed to crush a testicle and only two could remove the eye from its socket,” Guse said. No indication of where he got this figure from, and I’ve been sitting here looking (god help me). And I am presuming that he doesn’t mean “crush” as in “crush to flatness”, just “crush hard enough to deter an attacker”. Eh, Major, you know, Peace sounds to me like he knows what he’s talking about. And where I live, you can’t “walk into a supermarket and feel a cow spleen”. Generally speaking, the animal feed industry reserves the choicest parts of beef cattle, such as the spleens, lips, and anuses, for itself. The average consumer would have to know somebody who knew somebody in order to feel a cow spleen. Also, I’m under the impression that an eyeball is a fairly soft and jelly-like substance, whereas a testicle is quite firm, and as anyone who has ever cooked and eaten “prairie oysters” will tell you, they are actually rather tough and gritty in texture. So can we stop blowing smoke and maybe fight some ignorance? Why doesn’t somebody else here take over on “crush testicle” Google duty and see if you can find where this guy got the 4 pound figure (I hereby nominate the OP)? I’m tired. And may I say that I have never been so thankful to have ovaries. ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/43 "2000-12-03T23:49:46Z")
> [@](#): > > And may I say that I have never been so thankful to have ovaries. Damn! And I was just gonna post to GQ asking how much pressure it took to crush an ovary Oh, yes. The obligatory smilie 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/44 "2000-12-03T23:56:03Z")
Without a cite I can only conclude that Feelgud is either lying or guessing. ---
**Author:** ![Major\_Feelgud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3be4f8/32.png) [@Major\_Feelgud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Major_Feelgud)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/45 "2000-12-04T00:27:13Z")
Duck Duck Goose: Thank goodness just because you think peace is right doesn’t make it so. I’m still waiting for peace’s reply. For my elucidation, why do you think peace is “more right” than I am? I have refuted peace’s statements about numerical figures and anatomy. Anyone who has read any medical journals will agree with the first and anyone who’s ever taking anatomy will agree with my second. You have questioned my statement about not being able to walking into your local supermarket and feel a spleen. So what? That doesn’t prove peace is correct or that I am wrong. Where I live you can walk into a supermarket and buy spleens, livers, tongues, etc. You might want to drive out more than 5 miles from where you live and see what else is around. You seem to have taken sides without adding any useful information. Please stop blowing smoke, you’re not helping fight ingnorance. FYI, I have eaten eyeballs and they are somewhat firm when cooked! ---
**Author:** ![Major\_Feelgud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3be4f8/32.png) [@Major\_Feelgud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Major_Feelgud)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/46 "2000-12-04T00:29:00Z")
As for crushing ovaries, it takes a mere… Forget it, I’m not opening that can of worms. ---
**Author:** ![Gaspode](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gaspode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gaspode)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/47 "2000-12-04T00:47:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duck Duck Goose \* > \*\*Women have the ability to repel attackers, Guse said. “Every woman can apply 40 pounds of pressure with one hand – merely four pounds are needed to crush a testicle and only two could remove the eye from its socket,” Guse said \*\* Now there’s a ‘fact’ I’d take with a grain of salt. Removing the eye from it’s socket with any amount of pressure without fracturing the skull is bloody hard. All thse who dissected mammals at uni step forward. The opening in the skull is far smaller than the eyball itself. Added to this there are some fairly rigid muscle attachments to the skull, and the optic nerve. It could be achieved by rupturing the eyball itself and letting the vitreous humour out, but that would still require a knife to sever the muscle and nerve attachments, all which requires far more than 2lb/sq in. I’d rather trust the Major than this stuff. At least what he’s saying might be possible. ---
**Author:** ![ElusiveMiser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c37758/32.png) [@ElusiveMiser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElusiveMiser)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/48 "2000-12-04T03:11:06Z")
Hey, it’s me, the guy that started all of this thread! Feelgud and peace, you need to just stop. Maybe it’s my fault for not being specific enough, but C’MON! The whole five pound thing was just something I always felt threatened about. I mean, jeez. That’s five pounds between happiness and grandchildren and horrible, suicide-inducing pain/sadness. I just wanted someone to tell me it was okay, and to go back with the men in the nice white jackets to that big, happy building… ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/49 "2000-12-04T03:15:45Z")
Just so you know, **Duck Duck Goose** , you’re the only reason that this thread is still open. While I agree that that source is a bit suspect, so far, it’s the only source that anyone has cited in this thread. If we can have more substantiated figures by anyone in this thread, we can continue this discussion. If we don’t have cites, then please let this topic die. ---
**Author:** ![peace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peace)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/50 "2000-12-04T16:11:14Z")
ElusiveMiser, I’m happy that you are back. Perhaps, I should have answered you question at once, if only you asked it a bit differently. I hope, you learned your lesson: do not put the answer in your questions. Just tell me, if your question could be asked like this: how likely that my balls will be crushed in a barfight and I will have no grandchildren? I will answer it here and to a point. Due to your request, mods impatience and personal feelings I am not going to answer irrelevant Major’s questions here. If he wants to know the answers to his confused and misplaced questions about human cadavers, car testing, the difference between the testicle and the hydrocele, or why MRI does not convey any information about internal structure, I’ll oblige. I am always glad to share my knowledge with inquisitive people. I visit this GQMB every day. I visit others occationally. If he posts his questions elsewhere, I suggest he notifies the mods and they will alert me. Duck, are “prairie oysters” what I think they are? Once I was a guest of honor. A lamb was sacrificed and his balls were served as shish-kabob, together with the regular meat. It was considered a delicacy by the hosts, they called it “white meat”. Did I eat “prairie oysters”? ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/51 "2000-12-04T17:53:25Z")
Shoot, **Chronos,** don’t stay up late waiting for ME. Put this sucker out of its misery and let all the male members (heh) of the SDMB get on with their lives. :rolleyes: It’s got over 1,300 views so far. I bet a thread on crushing ovaries wouldn’t get nearly that much attention (_shrill female cries of “yeah, you sexist pigs!” are heard from the back of the auditorium…_) **Peace,** yeah, “prairie oysters” are ranchers’ slang term for “testicles”. ---
**Author:** ![Major\_Feelgud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3be4f8/32.png) [@Major\_Feelgud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Major_Feelgud)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/52 "2000-12-04T20:50:28Z")
Yes I agree. This thread has outlived it’s usefulness. Peace is unable to stand up to the challenge and as usual tries to sidetrack into insults. BTW peace, my “cite” for my numbers has been in the pit with your name on it for about a week. ---
**Author:** ![DavisMcDavis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dfb087/32.png) [@DavisMcDavis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavisMcDavis)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2000, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/53 "2000-12-07T20:27:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duck Duck Goose \* > **Peace,** yeah, “prairie oysters” are ranchers’ slang term for “testicles”. \*\* My understanding was that “prairie oysters” referred specifically to the dish of cooked **bull testicles** , not just a slang for all ranch testicles in general. I have a feeling a rancher would just say “balls” or something, unless he was **eating** them, in which case a euphemism would definitely be helpful in keeping one’s dinner down. Rather like “sweetbreads,” which are neither bread nor sweet. Discuss. Although I’m not sure I need to in this thread, I do have a cite with an example for this definition, actually: > [@](#): > > This is an annual celebration of the prairie oyster - a Montana delicacy consisting of deep-fried bull’s testicles\* [http://whatsonwhen.lycos.com/partners/lycosus/query.asp?categories=634&fromnow=Year\*](http://whatsonwhen.lycos.com/partners/lycosus/query.asp?categories=634&fromnow=Year*) ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2000, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/54 "2000-12-09T01:06:56Z")
[further hijack] I can give a cite from 1890 that “mountain oyster” was a lamb’s testicle. In _the same cite_ they refer to a “prarie oyster” as a “prarie cocktail”, a raw egg, peppered and salted, and drunk in vinegar or spirits."[/further hijack] ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/55 "2000-12-26T00:39:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Major Feelgud \* > \*\*The OP is poorly worded. I suppose you mean 5lbs per sq inch right? > > The answer is no. Despite the fact that the testicles do not contain any cartilage or bone, it takes much more than 5lbs/in2. > > It takes approximately 22lbs/sq in. instantaneous pressure to crush a human testicle. \*\* I’m surprised that no has challenged this 22 psi figure effectively yet. I don’t know what it is, but I do know that Norwegian testicles can withstand 156 psi. That is the pressure divers scoping the Russian sub in the Berents Sea at 107 meters depth underwent a couple of months ago. Now I know why the testicles of deep diving marine mammals are internal ! ---
**Author:** ![peace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peace)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/56 "2000-12-26T06:04:37Z")
## Grienspace, they can withstand the pressure only 'cause they become solid frozen by the time the depth of 107m in Barentz Sea is reached! 🙂 Peace ---
**Author:** ![jb\_farley](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9d8465/32.png) [@jb\_farley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jb_farley)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517/57 "2000-12-26T13:03:23Z")
“Norwegian testicles”. Now that is a great name for a band. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gruesome-medical-question-guys-you-know-what-im-talkin-about/43517.md?page=2)