# Guess the book from the opening line **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 15, 2003, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963 "2003-04-15T22:28:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Baraqiyal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@Baraqiyal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baraqiyal)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/141 "2003-04-18T18:29:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fiat Lux \* > \*\*How about this arresting opening: > > ‘If you’re going to read this, don’t bother’ \*\* “Choke” by that guy that wrote “Fight Club”. Here’s mine: “‘To be born again,’ sang Gibreel Farishta tumbling from the heavens, 'first you have to die, Ho Ji! Ho Ji!” ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/142 "2003-04-18T18:31:03Z")
> [@](#): > > He sat, in defiance of municipal orders, astride the gun Zam-Zammah on her brick platform opposite the old Ajaib-Gher - the Wonder House, as the natives call the Lahore Museum. ---
**Author:** ![Fiat\_Lux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ea666f/32.png) [@Fiat\_Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiat_Lux)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/143 "2003-04-18T18:32:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Baraqiyal \* > \*\*“Choke” by that guy that wrote “Fight Club”. > Here’s mine: > “‘To be born again,’ sang Gibreel Farishta tumbling from the heavens, 'first you have to die, Ho Ji! Ho Ji!” \*\* Chuck Palahniuk. As for yours, **Satanic Verses** , by Salman Rushdie? Northern Piper’s is **Kim** , by Rudyard Kipling ---
**Author:** ![Baraqiyal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@Baraqiyal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baraqiyal)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/144 "2003-04-18T18:50:10Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Fiat Lux_ > **As for yours, Satanic Verses, by Salman Rushdie?** Correct. ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMensch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@MonkeyMensch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMensch)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/145 "2003-04-18T18:57:01Z")
_On Christmas eve, many years ago, I lay quietly in my bed._ ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/146 "2003-04-18T19:02:24Z")
> [@](#): > > While I would not go so far, perhaps, as to describe the heart as actually leaden, I must confess that on the eve of starting to do my bit of time at Devrill Hall I was definately short on chirpiness. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/147 "2003-04-18T19:13:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tapioca Dextrin \* > \*\*“I had just been through hell and must have looked like death warmed over walking into the saloon, because when I asked the bartender whether they served zombies he said, ‘Sure, what’ll you have?’” \*\* Peter de Vries, _I Hear America Swinging_. (I had to dig for that one - I knew I’d read it, but my mind went blank over the title … ) How’s about this one … “No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are supposed, by some, to dream.” ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/148 "2003-04-18T19:25:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Steve Wright \* > \*\* > How’s about this one … > > “No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are supposed, by some, to dream.” \*\* The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson. Here’s on from my book swap. I’ll give you the first two sentences. “Slowly, she approached the sea. Her bare feet could feel the pulsing of the waves as they moved against the sand, gently depositing moreofferings of life before her, as if starfish and empty shells could atone for what had been taken” I’m prepared to be very impressed. As a side note to **Steve** - I hope you understood my anwer to your question ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/149 "2003-04-18T19:35:15Z")
“Lolita.” …oops. (Now, if it had been opening paragraph, I would have posted the entirety of the best. Opening paragraph. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![Fiat\_Lux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ea666f/32.png) [@Fiat\_Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiat_Lux)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/150 "2003-04-18T19:45:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Northern Piper \* > \*\*While I would not go so far, perhaps, as to describe the heart as actually leaden, I must confess that on the eve of starting to do my bit of time at Devrill Hall I was definately short on chirpiness \*\* That has got to be P.G Wodehouse, and one of the Jeeves books. Other than that, I don’t know, but hey; surely I get half-marks or something? Here’s one, with a scrap of dialogue included, from my homeland: Friday, in the evening, the landlady shouted up the stairs: ‘Oh God, oh Jesus, oh Sacred Heart. Boy, there’s two gentlemen to see you’. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/151 "2003-04-18T20:05:15Z")
Try this one. Non-fiction. > [@](#): > > “_Barb_ Ho-o-o-o!” The call echoed from the bridge of the submarine and dissipated, smothered in the icy fog. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2003, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/152 "2003-04-18T20:20:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fiat Lux \* > \*\*Here’s one, with a scrap of dialogue included, from my homeland: > > Friday, in the evening, the landlady shouted up the stairs: > ‘Oh God, oh Jesus, oh Sacred Heart. Boy, there’s two gentlemen to see you’. \*\* Who thought anyone here would read Bredan Behan? **Borstal Boy** ---
**Author:** ![Fiat\_Lux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ea666f/32.png) [@Fiat\_Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiat_Lux)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2003, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/153 "2003-04-19T17:04:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tapioca Dextrin \* > \*\*Who thought anyone here would read Bredan Behan? **Borstal Boy** \*\* You’re correct, sir. Here’s an easy one: The North Carolina Mutual Life Insurance agent promised to fly from Mercy to the other side of Lake Superior at three o’clock. ---
**Author:** ![FairyDust](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ccd318/32.png) [@FairyDust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyDust)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2003, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/154 "2003-04-19T20:35:18Z")
Imagine that you have to break someone’s arm. [I’ll give you a clue. The author of this novel is also an actor.] ---
**Author:** ![jeanster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9fc348/32.png) [@jeanster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jeanster)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2003, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/155 "2003-04-19T23:26:42Z")
I had this story from one who had no business to tell it to me, or to any other. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/156 "2003-04-21T06:29:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fiat Lux \* > **That has got to be P.G Wodehouse, and one of the Jeeves books. Other than that, I don’t know, but hey; surely I get half-marks or something?** Close enough - _The Mating Season_, in my opinion one of the best of the Jeeves books. (Edged only by the one that has Gussie Fink-Nottle awarding the school prizes, name of which escapes me at this hour.) How about: > [@](#): > > Sir Walter Elliot, of Kellynch-hall, in Somersetshire, was a man who, for his own amusement, never took up any book but the Baronetage; there he found occupation for an idle hour, and consolation in a distressed one; there his faculties were roused into admiration and respect, by contemplating the limited remnant of the earliest patents; there any unwelcome sensations, arising from domestic affairs, changed naturally into pity and contempt, as he turned over the almost endless creations of the last century - and there, if every other leaf were powerless, he could read his own history with an interest which never failed… ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 10:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/157 "2003-04-21T10:37:34Z")
**Persuasion** by Jane Austen > [@](#): > > Economics is the youngest of all sciences. ---
**Author:** ![Teebone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Teebone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teebone)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/158 "2003-04-21T15:47:41Z")
Kinda easy…reading it right now. “That was when I saw the Pendulum” ---
**Author:** ![Fiat\_Lux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ea666f/32.png) [@Fiat\_Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiat_Lux)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/159 "2003-04-21T15:59:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Teebone \* > \*\*Kinda easy…reading it right now. > > “That was when I saw the Pendulum” \*\* **Foucault’s Pendulum** , by Umberto Ecco, of course. One of my favorites. Try this one: War is a matter of vital importance to the state; a matter of life or death, the road either to survival or ruin ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963/160 "2003-04-21T16:55:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fiat Lux \* > \*\*War is a matter of vital importance to the state; a matter of life or death, the road either to survival or ruin \*\* [Sun Tzu: The Art of War](http://www.chinapage.com/sunzi-e.html#01) How about this: > [@](#): > > A surging, seething, murmuring crowd, of beings that are human only in name, for to the eye and ear they seem naught but savage creatures, animated by vile passions and by the lust of vengeance and of hate. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-book-from-the-opening-line/168963.md?page=9)