# Guess the mystery event **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 4, 2005, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983 "2005-09-04T03:00:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/41 "2005-09-07T18:18:35Z")
Oh, man! How are we supposed to stand the tension until then? Heartless HR people. (And after a build-up like this, I still say ice cream sandwiches.) ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Macphisto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@Ms\_Macphisto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Macphisto)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/42 "2005-09-07T18:32:11Z")
Yeah, this is getting annoying. Surely even if they haven’t got the date nailed down, they can give us some idea of what they’ve got planned. Plus it’s only Wednesday today. “Early next week” gives them plenty of wiggle room on the timing of the announcement, so I’m looking at nearly a week before I find out. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/43 "2005-09-07T19:01:53Z")
The longer they put off doing it or telling you what it is the greater the likelihood it’s motivational speaker time! One of our “choices” for training this past fiscal year was three separate chances to hear some raving lunatic go on for four hours on the topic of “How To Have A Great Day Everyday!” I chose not to avail myself of this opportunity. I was never asked why. Or, could it have to do with my “Cheerful People Are Annoying” sign that’s pinned on the bulletin board in my office? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/44 "2005-09-07T19:15:54Z")
> [@zagloba](#): > > Brainstorming session to develop an new mission statement If they allow you to have web access, I can save you those seven hours [here](http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/games/career/bin/ms.cgi). If that’s what it turns out to be, that is. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/45 "2005-09-07T19:20:03Z")
Interestingly enough, on Friday the 16th, my company is having a big barbecue out on the front lawn from 4-7. What’s the weather like where you are this Friday afternoon? Maybe they moved it on account of rain? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/46 "2005-09-07T19:20:48Z")
Oh, lord, spending seven hours of my life brainstorming to generate a mission statement? Do companies seriously _do_ that to their employees? ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/47 "2005-09-07T19:22:12Z")
> [@Ms Macphisto](#): > > **Bookkeeper** - given your past experience, you’d probably have appreciated one of my co-workers yesterday. Every few minutes: “Oh, I hope it isn’t something lame like bowling.” Later on, that changed to “Whatever it is, they better give us lots of booze.” I think we can pretty much all agree on that one (assuming it’s good stuff and not that swill Labatt’s passes off as beer). 😃 Bowling is an excuse to go drinking, and drinking is an excuse for bad bowling. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/48 "2005-09-07T19:32:35Z")
So… “Puppetry of The Penis” is coming to town. ---
**Author:** ![cbawlmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cbawlmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cbawlmer)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/49 "2005-09-07T20:24:46Z")
I once spent about 90 minutes in a committee meeting where we argued over the exact wording of a mission statement. I believe my main contribution was the word “fostering” and it was 90 minutes of pure hell. If I were you, I’d be terrified. It it’s something really good, they ought to publicize it weeks in advance so they can foster (!) some good will toward management for being so cool that they’re going to sponsor this awesome specific event three weeks from now. If it’s Zig Zigler, RUN don’t walk away from the building at lunchtime. ---
**Author:** ![Wolfgrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e19b73/32.png) [@Wolfgrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfgrrl)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/50 "2005-09-07T21:37:25Z")
> [@VCO3](#): > > Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s some sort of bullshit that **Who Moved my Cheese!??!** , _Six-Nine Smegma Delta_, or **Tossing fish for a living is fun, fuckface!** (or whatever the latest bullshit corporate america memetic disaster is) told them will make you more motivated and happy than things like a pay increase, more vacation, and better working conditions would. One of the guys I work with at my part-time job went to that fish market after seeing the video and talked to one of the guys that was in it. He said that they do, in fact, loathe having to throw the stupid fish around, but it pays well and people love it so they have to do it. My current company is good for announcing the “oh by the way you all have to stay late Friday night” stuff, it usually involves some corporate dipwad coming into blather about nothing for a couple of hours, and then we get pizza. I frequently get out of this by telling them I have to work at my other job, unless I’m really bored and want the pizza. ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/51 "2005-09-08T02:02:24Z")
Miniature golf. It’s going to be miniature golf. I swear, I couldn’t turn around at work today without someone asking me if I was going to the miniature golf thing tonight. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Macphisto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@Ms\_Macphisto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Macphisto)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/52 "2005-09-08T03:43:13Z")
Actually, I think the fact the company president wants to participate is a saving grace. I obviously don’t know him very well, particularly since he’s based out of the San Diego office, but he strikes me as being very anti-bullshit, so no seven hours of motivational speakers or mission statements. Oh, and going off-topic, how the hell did this get to two pages? I honestly expected to get maybe a couple of replies then sink like a stone, just like any other thread I’ve started. ---
**Author:** ![Hung\_Mung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Hung\_Mung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hung_Mung)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/53 "2005-09-08T03:51:02Z")
If everyone starts putting matching pairs of Keds and gathering around the punch bowl, I’d start looking for a fire exit. ---
**Author:** ![cbawlmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cbawlmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cbawlmer)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/54 "2005-09-08T16:11:40Z")
> [@Ms Macphisto](#): > > Oh, and going off-topic, how the hell did this get to two pages? I honestly expected to get maybe a couple of replies then sink like a stone, just like any other thread I’ve started. You created a mystery, and everybody wants to help solve it with their wild guesses! We hope it’s a fun thing, but we all fear the worst. The worst being Zig Zigler. His seminars are like a cross between a Mary Kay party and the Nuremberg Rallies. I’m scarred for life! ---
**Author:** ![Hung\_Mung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Hung\_Mung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hung_Mung)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/55 "2005-09-08T16:23:45Z")
As long as it ain’t [Matthew Lesko.](http://deadcantrant.com/shared/images/photo.matthew_lesko.gif) Dude gives me the heebie jeebies. ---
**Author:** ![Corii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aeb1de/32.png) [@Corii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corii)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/56 "2005-09-08T16:33:07Z")
A movie and dinner maybe? Dinner and a show? Maybe they’re taking you all out on a date! Did they reccommend a way to dress? That might give some clues. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/57 "2005-09-08T16:55:20Z")
Since they’re demanding your presence until 8 on a Friday night, their event had better feature an open bar. ---
**Author:** ![Tragically\_Dip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@Tragically\_Dip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tragically_Dip)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/58 "2005-09-11T14:34:10Z")
Well? Motivational speaker? Did it change your paradigm? Get you thinking outside the box? ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/59 "2005-09-11T17:51:44Z")
> [@Ms Macphisto](#): > > Just got an email from HR: > > > [@](#): > > > > Hello everyone! My apologies for not updating you sooner… > > > > Just a quick note to let you know that we will be rescheduling “the event”, originally planned for this Friday (the 9th), to either the 23rd or 30th of September, in response to [company president]'s request to take part in this event … > > > > Once the date is confirmed (by early next week), we’ll issue formal invitations will all the “details”, so that you can schedule your workload and plan accordingly. > > > > Stay tuned!.. > > If it’s the 30th, I’ve got an easy out - not only have I already booked that day off, I will be out of the country (well, Seattle, but out of the country sounds cooler). Of course, if that’s the case, given my luck it would wind up living up to the hype and being something I really, really want to participate in. > > **Bookkeeper** - given your past experience, you’d probably have appreciated one of my co-workers yesterday. Every few minutes: “Oh, I hope it isn’t something lame like bowling.” Later on, that changed to “Whatever it is, they better give us lots of booze.” I think we can pretty much all agree on that one (assuming it’s good stuff and not that swill Labatt’s passes off as beer). 😃 **Tragically Dip** , the date’s been changed to either September 23 or September 30. So, we still have to wait a while. ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Macphisto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@Ms\_Macphisto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Macphisto)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2005, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983/60 "2005-09-12T15:21:12Z")
Thanks **Feydeau**. I’m still as much in the dark as any of you. No one around here who has any advance knowledge is speaking. Damn them all for actually knowing how to keep their mouths shut! 😉 Hopefully I’ll hear something today. Actually, if they don’t say anything by this afternoon, I know at least one person who’ll probably camp out in the HR office until they do. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-mystery-event/319983.md?page=4)