# Guess The Title Of Star Wars Episode VII... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 31, 2013, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872 "2013-01-31T03:41:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/1 "2013-01-31T03:41:49Z")
… As the world knows, there will in a few years be a Star Wars Episode VII, taking place after the events of “Return of the Jedi.” Presumably the rather advanced age of Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, and Carrie Fisher will preclude Episode VII happening immediately after the events of ROTJ. Now, let’s be honest; nowhere outside of George Lucas’s rabies-infected mind did anyone think Episode I would be called “The Phantom Menace,” a stupid and horrible title that perfectly mirrors the horrible movie. So if you can successfully guess the title of Star Wars Episode VII within the next 90 days, and you’re actually right, I’ll give you ten bucks. Note: Not TOO many joke answers, please. Let’s actually see if someone can luck out. It’ll be called “Star Wars Episode VII…” ETA: Bear in mind official word is that all existing books, graphic novels, etc. that currently constitute alleged canon will be totally disregarded in writing the sequels. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/2 "2013-01-31T03:44:19Z")
Star Wars Episode VII: A New Empire Returns ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/3 "2013-01-31T03:57:04Z")
Star Wars Episode VII: Island of Dragons and Mermaids ---
**Author:** ![DataX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@DataX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DataX)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/4 "2013-01-31T04:02:52Z")
Serious try: Episode VII: The Two Apprentices Not so serious: Episode VII: Third Death Star is the Charm ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/5 "2013-01-31T04:08:08Z")
Star Wars Episode VII: Empire’s Vengance Not serious: Star Wars Episode VII: Rise of the Lens Flare ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/6 "2013-01-31T04:10:11Z")
Has it been officially established that its set post ROTJ? ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/7 "2013-01-31T04:11:37Z")
So many good titles have been used for Star Wars EU novels, comics, and video games already, it’s hard to come up with something that has the same epic old fashioned feel that hasn’t been used up. So I can’t choose “Dark Force Rising” or “Fall of the New Republic” or “Shadow of the Empire” or “The Force Unleashed” which are all really evocative and ambiguous enough to apply to almost any new story. _ **Star Wars, Episode VII: Rise of the New Republic** _ _ **Star Wars, Episode VIII: Smuggler’s Gambit** _ _ **Star Wars, Episode IX: Skywalker’s Downfall** _ ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/8 "2013-01-31T04:12:27Z")
**Serious:** _Defenders of the New Republic_ **Not Serious:** _Ewoks Everywhere, the Musical!_ ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/9 "2013-01-31T04:20:01Z")
Serious: The Darkening Storm Not Serious: Sithitical. ---
**Author:** ![Pork\_Rind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pork_rind/32/111_2.png) [@Pork\_Rind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pork_Rind)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/10 "2013-01-31T04:22:38Z")
Star Wars Episode VII: Electric Boogaloo Beyond that, really, I don’t even know where to start with the guesses. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/11 "2013-01-31T04:32:57Z")
Serious: SW Ep. VII: Rise of the Republic Joke: SW Ep. VII: Cloverfield 8 OP, what if one of the joke answers is the actual title? Does the guesser still get the $10? ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/12 "2013-01-31T04:40:53Z")
Star Peace That’s so goofy I’m sticking with it. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/13 "2013-01-31T04:50:21Z")
Ep VII: Revelation ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/14 "2013-01-31T05:02:05Z")
Ep XIII: Darkness Reborn Ep IX: Jedi Resurrection ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/15 "2013-01-31T05:11:42Z")
_Heir to the Empire_ ---
**Author:** ![Hail\_Ants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/dc4da7/32.png) [@Hail\_Ants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hail_Ants)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/16 "2013-01-31T05:41:48Z")
**Star Wars Episode VII: The Apology** … ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/17 "2013-01-31T05:50:47Z")
Star Wars Episode VII: The Next Generation ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/18 "2013-01-31T05:52:39Z")
Star Wars Episode VII: The Shakey Cam ---
**Author:** ![JKilez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e5b9ba/32.png) [@JKilez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKilez)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/19 "2013-01-31T06:08:29Z")
Star Wars Episode VII: Friendship is Magic ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872/20 "2013-01-31T06:26:18Z")
Serious: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Weakens Star Wars Episode VII: The Empire’s New Clothes Star Wars Episode VII: A New Crisis Not so serious: Star Wars Episode VII: Adrian’s Revenge (Props to anybody who understands the reference.) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guess-the-title-of-star-wars-episode-vii/648872.md?page=2)