# Guests over who Will. Not. Leave. What can you do? (Do not need answers fast) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 12, 2010, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852 "2010-10-12T02:16:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/41 "2010-10-13T16:38:33Z")
He originally posted this in GQ, and went to the trouble to note that this situation would be in the state of California (establishing jurisdiction). Neither of those imply a manners question to me. ---
**Author:** ![The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_wind_of_my_soul)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/42 "2010-10-13T16:42:50Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#): > > My friend Teresa got the whole party to chant > > “Give me a G” > “Give me an E!” > “Give me a T!” > > And so forth continuing through THEFUCKOUT > > And then proclaiming: > > “What does that spell” > > …Que a bunch of drunk people thinkign real hard for a minute… > > Ohhhhhhh Hahaha this is great! Your question reminds me of a time in college when I brought my football player boyfriend and his football friends to a party being thrown by the emo alternative kids. The football players got drunk and violent and none of the alternative kids could get them to stop or leave. What ended up working best was a chain reaction of sorts. My friends asked me to get the football players out, I, in turn, asked my boyfriend to get them out, my boyfriend got the soberest of his friends to herd the drunker ones out, and in about ten minutes the guys were wrestling each other on the lawn and were no longer the emo kids’ problem. (They were Campus Safety’s problem.) ---
**Author:** ![RedWood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f08c70/32.png) [@RedWood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedWood)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/43 "2010-10-13T17:06:22Z")
Putting drunk folks out of your house is _not_ a good solution… if they drive and hurt anything/anyone, they could sue. Give them a pillow and go to bed. If they’re not impaired… may I throw Yoko Ono and William Shatner into the “frighten them out” music mix? ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/44 "2010-10-13T17:14:16Z")
> [@Satchmo](#): > > > [@Yllaria](#): > > > > I have the LP of “It’s a Small World” if anyone wants to borrow it. I’m not likely to be in a position where I’d have to use it. > > “Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald” is my house clearer of choice. On repeat if necessary. > > 🆒 I was just thinking that this was starting to sound like a Leave This Party mix tape, when Redwood said: > [@RedWood](#): > > Putting drunk folks out of your house is _not_ a good solution… if they drive and hurt anything/anyone, they could sue. > Give them a pillow and go to bed. > If they’re not impaired… may I throw Yoko Ono and William Shatner into the “frighten them out” music mix? So we’ve got: bagpipes Don’t Worry. Be Happy. It’s a Small World Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" Yoko Ono, and William Shatner. Does anyone have anything else to add? Should this be another thread so that everyone can play? ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/45 "2010-10-13T17:29:20Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > Does anyone have anything else to add? Should this be another thread so that everyone can play? So this is how you invite a thread to end? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/46 "2010-10-13T17:33:53Z")
_The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald_ performed on bagpipes and accordion with vocal accompaniment by William Shatner? \* I think you’d be better off using a big-screen TV and surround-sound system to play Leonard Nimoy singing the [Ballad of Bilbo Baggins](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XC73PHdQX04). If that won’t scare 'em off, nothing will. \*\* Actually, I’d listen to that.\* ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/47 "2010-10-13T17:47:18Z")
Somewhere, I read about a couple who would fake getting into an argument to get unwanted people to leave. I don’t think that’s for big parties though. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/48 "2010-10-13T17:56:34Z")
Tell everyone it’s time for the clothes to come off and the orgy to begin. Either your guests all leave or your party goes to an interesting new level. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/49 "2010-10-13T20:43:09Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > So we’ve got: > > bagpipes > Don’t Worry. Be Happy. > It’s a Small World > Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" > Yoko Ono, and > William Shatner. I can already visualize the late night “Kill the Party” Collection commercials with the titles scrolling by. I am sure we could throw in some assorted Captain and Teneille to round it out. Just throw in enough stuff to remind everyone of their parents and party should end quickly. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/50 "2010-10-13T22:18:21Z")
> [@drachillix](#): > > I am sure we could throw in some assorted Captain and Teneille to round it out. Did William Shatner ever do a cover of _Muskrat Love_? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/51 "2010-10-13T22:38:02Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > I have the LP of “It’s a Small World” if anyone wants to borrow it. I’m not likely to be in a position where I’d have to use it. I didn’t need to know that existed. :eek: What else is on it, if it is not too dreadful to recount? I was going to suggest playing Mr. Bojangles over and over again, but this is much more horrible. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2010, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/52 "2010-10-13T22:53:52Z")
[quote=“Gary “Wombat” Robson, post:46, topic:556852”] I think you’d be better off using a big-screen TV and surround-sound system to play Leonard Nimoy singing the [Ballad of Bilbo Baggins](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XC73PHdQX04). If that won’t scare 'em off, nothing will. [/QUOTE] I think Mr. Nimoy has a very nice voice personally. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2010, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/53 "2010-10-14T00:29:23Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > > [@Yllaria](#): > > > > Does anyone have anything else to add? Should this be another thread so that everyone can play? > > So this is how you invite a thread to end? 😃 I usually invite it to end by posting in it. [quote=“Gary “Wombat” Robson, post:50, topic:556852”] > [@drachillix](#): > > I am sure we could throw in some assorted Captain and Teneille to round it out. Did William Shatner ever do a cover of _Muskrat Love_? 😃 [/QUOTE] Do you need Mr. Shatner to make that song worse? I think it would do the job all on its own. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2010, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/54 "2010-10-14T01:32:01Z")
Stock a junk drawer with a pair of ski goggles & a paint respirator well before the party. Place a broom by your back door. At the time you are done with the party, send everyone who lives there (and who you love) upstairs to bed. Tell the guests you are going to cook up your ‘trademark breakfast’ in the kitchen. In a hot skillet, drop 1 stick of butter cut in quarters and then throw in a bowl of sliced Habanero peppers. As Cloud Plume develops, grab and securely place on goggles & paint respirator while grabbing the broom. As guests start hunching over coughing and crying, beat them with the broom and chase them out the front door while you scream “F-cking Hippies! I’ll Teach _You_ Not To Go To Vietnam!!!” Lock the door when you’re done, dead-bolt as needed. Retro. It never goes outta style. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2010, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852/55 "2010-10-14T01:41:09Z")
What about Pat Boone’s “In a Metal Mood?” It’s got to be good for something. (Of course, I don’t think I’d want to be seen buying it, that’s the problem…) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guests-over-who-will-not-leave-what-can-you-do-do-not-need-answers-fast/556852.md?page=2)