# Guy Stuff **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 5, 1999, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130 "1999-11-05T19:00:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 18
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/341 "1999-11-12T19:16:00Z")
Heeheehee…we are going to be soooooo busted when they wake up… ::::sketches lovely peace symbol on Metro’s butt::: ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/342 "1999-11-12T19:19:00Z")
Ok, I’ll drop trou, but the first one that giggles at my tattoo gets a slushball right in the chops. Y’see, a bunch of us were drunk in Tijuana once, and a big ol’ Kosher dill pickle seemed like a great at the time. Oh, I know it looks like a baby gherkin…_now_. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/343 "1999-11-12T19:26:00Z")
::staggers to feet, winds up:: Woohoo! Hit Sealemon on the bulls-eye! Touchdown!! And let me see those magic markers… ::draws smiley face, using Uncle’s belly button for nose:: ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/344 "1999-11-12T19:26:00Z")
Oh… there once was a gherkin… Time for another round Falcon * * * “Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.” ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/345 "1999-11-12T19:49:00Z")
_draws comical cock-and-balls on Flypsyde’s forehead, giggling all the while_ Okay, everyone, when he wakes up, pretend like nothing’s wrong, and see how long he walks around like this! ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/346 "1999-11-12T19:59:00Z")
::snort:: Oh my…we are going to be in SO much trouble when they wake up… And time for a round of what, Sue?? More beer? ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/347 "1999-11-12T20:01:00Z")
Hey, hey! What the hell’s happenin’ here? Why am I all blue? Is it that cold out here? I think we should turn around and head back south. Uh oh, I can’t find the truck keys. They must be lost in the snow. I’m gonna go melt some more. And where _the hell_ is my beer? **BUUuuuuUURRrrrrRRPppP, BeEEelllLLllchhHHhhh**! Ahhhh, now I got room for more. * * * **Dopeler effect:** The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/348 "1999-11-12T20:04:00Z")
:::whistling casually, making a huge point of _not_ looking at UncleBeer’s stomach::: ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/349 "1999-11-12T20:11:00Z")
_comes out of the back of the truck, carrying a large tray of fresh, hot pork rinds_ Man, there’s got to be some serious shrinkage going on over there. Hey Sealemon, how about this: “Exit the warrior, today’s Tom Sawyer; he gets high on you – with the energy you trade, he gets right on to the friction of the day.” * * * Live a Lush Life Da Chef ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/350 "1999-11-12T20:15:00Z")
Oooh,fire up the willing engine, responding with a roar… Tires spitting gravel, I commit my weekly crime. Hey Seal, how’d you know I’m a Rush fan? * * * Live a Lush Life Da Chef ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/351 "1999-11-12T20:47:00Z")
WOOHOO! 'Nother Rush fan! Crank that stereo, Sealemon! “We are young, wandering the face of the earth, wondering what our dreams might be worth…” And hey, I think the Christmas decorations are up at Graceland…who’s up for a pilgrimage to go see the King? Party in the Jungle Room! ::finds half-empty bottle of Scotch, downs it:: * * * “The point of a journey is not to arrive.” -Neil Peart, Rush ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/352 "1999-11-12T20:48:00Z")
I didn’t, really, Chef. Falcon and ColdFire started playing Rush and I just joined in. Mmmm…These pork rinds are GREAT! And I don’t even _like_ pork rinds! 😉 Man, my ass is frozen! \< Glares at Sue, Falcon and Chrisi \>Sue, can you say “icicle enima?” Make me some cookies or sumthin’, and all will be forgiven… Ans as for ColdFire and Falcon, the first one of you monkeys that start’s singing “By Tor And The Snow Dog” is gonna wind up with frostbite in a _very_ interesting location… \< looking for some tequila to warm up with \> * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/353 "1999-11-12T20:48:00Z")
And YES! Had the 350th post! ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/354 "1999-11-12T20:57:00Z")
::leers at Sealemon:: Now, is that a threat or a promise, dear? Wait a minute…calling me a MONKEY! Them’s fighting words! ::goes searching for my “Fly By Night” CD, grinning evilly:: * * * “The point of a journey is not to arrive.” -Neil Peart, Rush ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/355 "1999-11-12T20:57:00Z")
Icicle _suppository_. :::looking down::: What do chilblains look like? :::draws drawers back up::: ---
**Author:** ![metroshane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/aeb1de/32.png) [@metroshane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/metroshane)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/356 "1999-11-12T21:06:00Z")
Did you ladies really have to shave my ass before drawing the peace symbol? (humming) watch out where the huskies go, and don’t you eat that yellow snow! * * * We live in an age that reads to much to be wise, and thinks too much to be beautiful–Oscar Wilde ---
**Author:** ![Imthecowgodmoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Imthecowgodmoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imthecowgodmoo)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/357 "1999-11-12T22:01:00Z")
mmmmwwwhat’s happenen??!? Where am I? Why’s it so dark? Am I in the trunk?!?! _BANGBANGBANG_\*\* HELP! I can’t find my beer! Wait a second, this isn’t the trunk… Who’s fat ass is sitting on me? AWWWWW, damn that stinks! * * * “I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.”-- Calvin and Hobbes (\_\_) `\/-------\ `| |-----| | …c.c…c.c… ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/358 "1999-11-12T22:15:00Z")
Yes we had to shave your ass, Metro. Before we shaved it, it was like trying to doodle on a Douglas fir. :::slugs off tequila bottle::: Are there any tatoo parlors close by? That peace symbol looks so good on Metro’s butt I think I’d like one of my own. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/359 "1999-11-12T22:22:00Z")
‘You’re watching Channel 88 and now we go over to our ‘Eye in the Sky’. Pete, you’ve got something to report…’ ‘Yes, Chuck, this is Pete O’Grady in the Channel 88 copter. We’ve got reports of unusual activity in the woods just off the highway. And I can see a vehicle - looks like a beer tanker - there may have been an accident because there are other vehicles parked nearby. Now I can see some movement in the woods and … wait I can zoom in on a group of people…’ (camera pans in on Sealemon presenting a target - frantic noises by studio director) 'and we interrupt that live transmission to bring you local news… * * * I just had deja vu, and I’m sure it’s happened before… ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 1999, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/360 "1999-11-12T22:38:00Z")
::finds tape, grins at Sealemon:: Here, let’s put THIS in the stereo! ::sings along:: _The battle’s over and the dust is clearing, Disciples of the Snow Dog sound the knell, Rejoicing echoes as the dawn is nearing, By-Tor in defeat retreats to Hell_ ::looks over at Sealemon:: HEY! Umm, what are you going to do with that snowball? HELP! * * * “The point of a journey is not to arrive.” -Neil Peart, Rush [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130.md?page=17) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130.md?page=19)