# Guy Stuff **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 5, 1999, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130 "1999-11-05T19:00:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 34
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/661 "1999-12-02T12:59:00Z")
I think they put it all on my Visa card Chief, don’t worry. * * * **Dopeler effect:** The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/662 "1999-12-02T13:02:00Z")
You are the best Uncle… and thank god, signing your name wasnt too hard… The Hunky Unky just rolled right off the pen 🙂 * * * I am me… accept it or not. ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/663 "1999-12-02T13:05:00Z")
ummmm Oh yeah… it was all Cristi’s idea… between her leading me astray and all the beer… what can I say… I was easily led * * * I am me… accept it or not. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/664 "1999-12-02T17:22:00Z")
So where do I send my bill? -Melin, Esq. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/665 "1999-12-02T17:23:00Z")
So where do I send my bill? -Melin, Esq. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/666 "1999-12-02T17:28:00Z")
## -1 and counting… Coldfire * * * “You know how complex women are” - Neil Peart, Rush (1993) ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/667 "1999-12-02T17:28:00Z")
6 6 6 !!! * * * Coldfire * * * “You know how complex women are” - Neil Peart, Rush (1993) ---
**Author:** ![Atrael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Atrael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atrael)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/668 "1999-12-02T17:39:00Z")
Just had to get this past the evil number… ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/669 "1999-12-02T17:46:00Z")
It was real, y’all. OK, it was _surreal_. nuthin’ wrong with that. I’m just glad that for one shining moment, this thread passed up The Earth Is Flat thread in Great Debates. We gotta party again soon…but not _too_ soon. I’m not as young as i used to be. 😉 * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/670 "1999-12-03T06:21:00Z")
Hey, before everybody takes off we need to pass the hat for Melin’s legal fees. And somebody has to hose out those buses and return 'em. Now cough up some cash. * * * **Dopeler effect:** The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/671 "1999-12-03T06:37:00Z")
Cash ? You never said anything about cash at the start of this venture UncleBeer. We all thought you were paying for everthing and cleaning up too. The host of a party usually does ya know. As for Melin well, yeah , here give her this :: hands over a roll of quarters, 2 coupons for buy one get one free pizza, a soda cap good for a free 20 oz soda, the number of a male stripper I know, and 10 $ 1.00 (for the stripper, he has a real problem with quarters in his g-sting, thong thing ! ):: That ought to take care of my part, I will need her when I find Lion, unless cutting off a certian body part and running it through a juicer isn’t against the law. * * * Ayesha - Lioness * * * There are two solutions to every problem : the wrong one, and mine (Thomas A. Edison) ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/672 "1999-12-02T21:12:00Z")
Woohoo! Lioness,if that stripper’s that good, you’ve got all the legal services you’ll need once you catch up with the King of the Jungle there! -Melin ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 1999, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/673 "1999-12-02T23:51:00Z")
Here Melin… :::rummages through pockets::: I’ve got some lint, a sticky BreathSaver, and two cents. Will that help? I just spent the last of my change calling my husband to let him know I was on my way home. He said “No hurry, honey. I’ve had you declared legally dead, and the kids and I were just packing to go to DisneyWorld with the insurance money.” Sigh. Well, at least I got the opportunity to be a bad influence on someone… ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/674 "1999-12-03T00:14:00Z")
**on** someone?!! ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/675 "1999-12-03T00:21:00Z")
Yeah, **on** someone! Sue said I led her astray. But I couldn’t have done it without you guys. You all taught me just how special it is to be a bad influence. :::snifsnif::: I love you guys! But I just realized something…I think Chief was making a sick joke, and it just sailed right over my head. Sigh. All that alcohol makes ya slow. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/676 "1999-12-03T03:34:00Z")
:::Rysdad glances around slowly surveying the carnage. Then, seemingly satisfied, he makes a fist and thrusts it into the air::: “YES!” :::His normally placid demeanor returns, yet a small smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. He stuffs his hands into his pockets, turns, and ambles away.::: ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/677 "1999-12-03T05:00:00Z")
I have a dime, three bottle caps and a Canadian penny. Hey, why not give Melin all the empties–she can sell 'em to a recycle place. ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/678 "1999-12-03T05:58:00Z")
Melin…here ya go… ::: reaches into _secret_ hiding place and pulls out—::: The sacred Moose Schlong, totem of this fine buncha n’er-do-wells. Wield it wisely, Melin, it packs quite a wallop. There’s a matching coat staggering around somewhere… Muchas smoochas to all ! -L- ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 1999, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/679 "1999-12-03T06:11:00Z")
Yes, and if you rub the coat long enought it becomes a three piece suit. 😉 Uh I doubt that Melin will be willing to touch the empties, they look kinda ,well like Homer has been using them. I’ll miss you guys, ::sniff sniff:: * * * Ayesha - Lioness * * * There are two solutions to every problem : the wrong one, and mine (Thomas A. Edison) ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 1999, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130/680 "1999-12-04T03:11:00Z")
Wow – the sacred moose schlong is MINE? ::wondering how it would look stuffed and mounted in my office – MAN that’ll scare the opposition!:: So how do I report this on my income tax? -Melin [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130.md?page=33) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guy-stuff/14130.md?page=35)