# Guys ask girls out- useful convention, or unfair burden? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 3, 2012, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-ask-girls-out-useful-convention-or-unfair-burden/608232 "2012-01-03T06:00:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![kombatminipig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5ac83/32.png) [@kombatminipig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kombatminipig)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2012, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-ask-girls-out-useful-convention-or-unfair-burden/608232/161 "2012-01-09T16:40:07Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Of all the silly things said in this thread, I think this one takes the cake. If someone doesn’t agree, well, they’re immature and afraid of being labeled a slut or just haven’t been “introduced to the concept in the right way.” > > I don’t know what this Scotsman puts on his porridge, but he’s wearing frilly panties under his kilt. Absolutely, that’s exactly what I meant. :smack: Don’t misunderstand me, I simply meant to say that there isn’t any inherent difference between genders when it comes to sex, whether serious or casual. What society tells us that we’re supposed to feel and value is another story. ---
**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2012, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-ask-girls-out-useful-convention-or-unfair-burden/608232/162 "2012-02-16T22:37:54Z")
I was reading the article [Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others](http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/3088165/ns/today-today_hidden/t/why-men-marry-some-women-not-others/#.Tz0ISuT7qVo) and it reminded me of this thread: > [@](#): > > These men have been rejected and demeaned for years by women because they weren’t tall enough or handsome enough or smooth enough. It’s easy to understand why they’re so reluctant to put their egos on the line once more. If you meet a man who appeals to you, don’t let his lack of social skills dissuade you from showing you’re interested in him. Only after being convinced you like him will he be able to summon the courage to ask you for a date. You may even end up having to do the asking, but it might be worthwhile: These “diamonds in the rough” are often strong candidates for marriage. > … > Maybe that’s why seven out of eight men aged fifty and over who were about to marry for the first time were marrying women who had been divorced. These women told us they saw lack of social skills or a few inches in height as a minor detail, because they had already had a man who was tall or suave, and he hadn’t made a very good husband. A lot of good men get out of the market because they don’t have the social skills to succeed in asking women out. The guys that are left are good at asking women out, but (in my experience) those guys are not looking for a long-term relationship–much less marriage. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-ask-girls-out-useful-convention-or-unfair-burden/608232/163 "2012-02-17T17:09:52Z")
Whenever I’m out with a group of male friends it’s interesting to see that the guys in serious relationships are the ones who flirt the most with women. Now, these aren’t guys who cheat (AFAIK); they just have that confidence and can just be relaxed and fun because they don’t actually want it to lead anywhere. But from a woman’s POV, if you’re quite passive in meeting new men, and are put off by initial nervousness, you may find yourself in the “all the nice guys are married” zone for a while. ---
**Author:** ![ataraxy22](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ataraxy22/32/307_2.png) [@ataraxy22](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ataraxy22)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-ask-girls-out-useful-convention-or-unfair-burden/608232/164 "2012-02-17T20:16:25Z")
I’d think at least 7 out of 8 women in the dating pool of your average 50+ year old man would be divorced. That these men would be choosing to marry previously married women is not exactly surprising! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-ask-girls-out-useful-convention-or-unfair-burden/608232.md?page=8)