# Guys - do you feel an 'ick' factor if you see a gay couple kiss? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 25, 2012, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787 "2012-03-25T20:26:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mr.Kobayashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4af34b/32.png) [@Mr.Kobayashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Kobayashi)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/1 "2012-03-25T20:26:09Z")
I’m sure I’ve seen this discussed on the Dope before, but I’ll be damned if I can find the thread. Put simply, if while out and about you see two normal looking chaps plant one on each others lips, do you feel any sort of ‘squick’, any factor of revulsion either consciously or unconsciously? I have to confess, for a while I did and even now I get a very slight feeling of it if I see it. I think it was to do with unfamiliarity - I’m not at all disgusted by the concept (if anything I’m admittedly fascinated by society’s reactions to it), but for some reason I had trouble ‘processing’ it in the flesh. Is it an indication of a homophobe, a reaction to the unfamiliar? Both? Something else? ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/2 "2012-03-25T20:44:06Z")
Yes, can’t help it. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/3 "2012-03-25T20:48:20Z")
No. Pretty much of a non event to me. ---
**Author:** ![Terr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Terr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terr)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/4 "2012-03-25T20:50:08Z")
You should clarify, though. Very few guys will answer “yes” is the “gay couple” are two lesbians. Well, two good looking lesbians. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/5 "2012-03-25T20:56:27Z")
I may or may not have seen same sex couples kiss on the lips (other than two hetero girls at a party just for fun) but if so it wasn’t particularly dramatic or tramatic or I’d have remembered it. Now, if two males were to vigorously make out in front of me, I’d be a bit squicked out, but that’s definitely never happened and besides it’d also feel a bit weird to see a hetero couple or two girls do the same. ETA: “Other” since it depends on the level of kissing. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Kobayashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4af34b/32.png) [@Mr.Kobayashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Kobayashi)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/6 "2012-03-25T20:57:10Z")
> [@Terr](#): > > You should clarify, though. Very few guys will answer “yes” is the “gay couple” are two lesbians. Well, two good looking lesbians. In the OP/Poll ‘fella’ and ‘chap’ both mean blokes. Er, men. Yeah, two women kissing is rarely a cause for feeling uncomfortable for guys. As for ‘level’ of kiss, just a normal [kiss](http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44309000/jpg/_44309884_gall_kiss4.jpg), I’m not thinking that they’re trying to eat each others faces off or something over the top. ---
**Author:** ![Terr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Terr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terr)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/7 "2012-03-25T20:58:00Z")
> [@Mr.Kobayashi](#): > > In the OP ‘fella’ and ‘chap’ both mean blokes. Er, men. Yeah, two women kissing is rarely a cause for feeling uncomfortable for guys. My bad. Just looked at the title. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/8 "2012-03-25T20:59:44Z")
How timely - I was wondering about this earlier today (heard “Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera, the video of which featured two men kissing, made me wonder how people felt about seeing that, when to me as a gay guy it’s a lovely thing). I accept that straight people, men particularly, don’t want to see men kissing because of their cultural conditioning that it’s wrong. Women don’t seem to be so much of a problem, I can’t imagine why… I wonder if this is something that’ll fall out in the coming generation who are being raised to be, on the whole, neutral towards gayness. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim_r.mortiss/32/142_2.png) [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_R.Mortiss)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/9 "2012-03-25T21:01:26Z")
Definitely a gross-out. ---
**Author:** ![Stelios](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Stelios](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stelios)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/10 "2012-03-25T21:06:37Z")
Yep, can’t help it. It’s not something I’m proud of, but it seems to be a hard-wired reaction. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/11 "2012-03-25T21:11:54Z")
A peck/short kiss on the lips? No. A face-sucking make out session? Yes, most definitely. But then, a straight couple doing the same blatantly in public is just about as uncomfortable. Save it for bed. Two women? I dunno. If they were strangers or friends I wouldn’t be douchy enough to cheer them on, but the inappropriateness stays. And the 3rd option, “used to” could probably apply to most people who didn’t say “yes.” We’re all 10 years old at some point. ---
**Author:** ![Martin\_Hyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/47e85d/32.png) [@Martin\_Hyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martin_Hyde)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/12 "2012-03-25T21:13:45Z")
I don’t get grossed out very easily and I’ve been up close and personal to traumatic body wounds, large numbers of corpses and etc. so I think I’ve had a lot of opportunities to get “icked” out by things. I will say that whether it is two guys, two girls, or a guy and a girl I _dislike_ public displays of affection like that. Not saying I’d stop and criticize it, not saying people shouldn’t do it, just saying I personally dislike PDA. I’ve never engaged in it myself. I sort of have a Victorian mindset on things like propriety though, and believe a lot of things people are totally happy airing out in the public square are properly kept in private. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/13 "2012-03-25T21:18:37Z")
I said yes. I also would have said yes to old people kissing, or very ugly women kissing, so it is not just a gay thing. It’s a “couples i find extremely sexually unappealing” thing. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/14 "2012-03-25T21:18:42Z")
I don’t particularly like to watch any two people make out in public, but there is an additional hard-wired biological reaction to two guys swapping spit. I doubt that will ever change. Two women doing the same doesn’t evoke the same reaction for me. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/15 "2012-03-25T22:14:37Z")
I can’t ever remember feeling grossed out about any two people kissing, be they old or ugly, straight or gay. Unless it was a movie and somebody had just eaten something gross, or something like that. As a gay man it fascinates me that straight guys claim to have this “hard-wired” aversion to seeing 2 guys kiss. I have no such aversion to seeing a heterosexual couple kiss! I think it’s just a socially imprinted thing, and not necessarily biologically hard wired. I’ve never met any other gay guy who got “grossed out” when he saw a straight couple kiss. Now… if they are REALLY going to town, that’s where I would start to feel a bit uncomfortable, regardless of sexuality. ---
**Author:** ![AqualungBats5th](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6bbea6/32.png) [@AqualungBats5th](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AqualungBats5th)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/16 "2012-03-25T22:15:50Z")
OP, you might not have been able to find a specific thread but it’s hardly some secret many straight men feel that way. Pretty often when the topic of gay sex/affection comes up, some straight dude is right there to share about how gross he thinks it but he’s totally not a homophobe. Anyway, to answer the question, no. Not in the slightest. ---
**Author:** ![Martin\_Hyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/47e85d/32.png) [@Martin\_Hyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martin_Hyde)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/17 "2012-03-25T22:16:57Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > I can’t ever remember feeling grossed out about any two people kissing, be they old or ugly, straight or gay. Unless it was a movie and somebody had just eaten something gross, or something like that. > > As a gay man it fascinates me that straight guys claim to have this “hard-wired” aversion to seeing 2 guys kiss. I have no such aversion to seeing a heterosexual couple kiss! I think it’s just a socially imprinted thing, and not necessarily biologically hard wired. I’ve never met any other gay guy who got “grossed out” when he saw a straight couple kiss. > > Now… if they are REALLY going to town, that’s where I would start to feel a bit uncomfortable, regardless of sexuality. I dunno, I’ve known a lot of gay men who are extremely grossed out by women in general, so I think some people do have “natural” disgust for things that isn’t necessarily the result of social imprinting. ---
**Author:** ![Martin\_Hyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/47e85d/32.png) [@Martin\_Hyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martin_Hyde)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/18 "2012-03-25T22:18:09Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > I can’t ever remember feeling grossed out about any two people kissing, be they old or ugly, straight or gay. Unless it was a movie and somebody had just eaten something gross, or something like that. > > As a gay man it fascinates me that straight guys claim to have this “hard-wired” aversion to seeing 2 guys kiss. I have no such aversion to seeing a heterosexual couple kiss! I think it’s just a socially imprinted thing, and not necessarily biologically hard wired. I’ve never met any other gay guy who got “grossed out” when he saw a straight couple kiss. > > Now… if they are REALLY going to town, that’s where I would start to feel a bit uncomfortable, regardless of sexuality. To put it another way, just because I’m not grossed out by dead bodies, does that mean no one else could legitimately have a natural gross out reaction to a dead body? ---
**Author:** ![mister\_nyx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@mister\_nyx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mister_nyx)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/19 "2012-03-25T22:18:40Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > I don’t particularly like to watch any two people make out in public, but there is an additional hard-wired biological reaction to two guys swapping spit. I doubt that will ever change. Two women doing the same doesn’t evoke the same reaction for me. What’s the evidence that it’s a “hard-wired biological reaction” rather than the result of socialization? [QUOTE=Martin Hyde] I dunno, I’ve known a lot of gay men who are extremely grossed out by women in general, so I think some people do have “natural” disgust for things that isn’t necessarily the result of social imprinting. [/QUOTE] Have you now. ---
**Author:** ![Martin\_Hyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/47e85d/32.png) [@Martin\_Hyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martin_Hyde)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787/20 "2012-03-25T22:20:50Z")
> [@mister\_nyx](#): > > Have you now. Google “Dan Savage canned ham.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-do-you-feel-an-ick-factor-if-you-see-a-gay-couple-kiss/616787.md?page=2)